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manomo
PeaNut
PeaNut 249,133
February 2006
Posts: 437
Layouts: 0
 |  Posted: 11/25/2012 4:51:46 PM
This is the topic of discussion today with some of my friends. If you have married children do you buy them an anniversary gift or do your parents buy one for you and your DH? | |
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mom22reds
PeaAddict
PeaNut 191,815
February 2005
Posts: 1,948
Layouts: 4
Loc: Moorpark, CA
 |  Posted: 11/25/2012 4:54:20 PM
No, at least not in my family. I think that would be sort of odd...
Sonia |
2013 Goal:
Organize my entire house one drawer, cabinet, nook and cranny at a time!
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megmc
AncestralPea
PeaNut 497,090
January 2011
Posts: 4,910
Layouts: 0
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 4:54:54 PM
What a wonderful idea. Never heard of it before, but really a great idea. Even just a card would be nice.
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SuzastampinCTMH
PeaFixture
PeaNut 157,667
July 2004
Posts: 3,790
Layouts: 15
Loc: Upstate NY
| Posted: 11/25/2012 4:55:43 PM
My parents bought us gifts when they were alive. We gave them gifts also. |
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pennyring
Thrift Ninja
PeaNut 226,011
October 2005
Posts: 22,413
Layouts: 40
Loc: Rite Aid
| Posted: 11/25/2012 4:55:48 PM
No, my family would do a card or something (if they thought about it), but not a gift.
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Princess Pea
AncestralPea
PeaNut 57,475
December 2002
Posts: 4,815
Layouts: 0
Loc: The South
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 4:55:49 PM
My mom never has. I think my ILs gave us something for our first anniversary, and usually a card every year since. |
Melissa
Wife, Mommy, and First Grade Teacher
Visit my blog: www.mrswilliamson.com
"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are."
Theodore Roosevelt
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voltagain
OklaPhoma
PeaNut 18,334
July 2001
Posts: 35,139
Layouts: 15
Loc: State of cultural confusion. Yeehaw and Aloha have collided!
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 4:55:53 PM
No.. in my family the only people who exchange gifts for an anniversary are the two who married each other. The rest of us may say "congratulations" but that is about the extent of it..
well..other than super big anniversaries like 50. |
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Kelpea
In a HapPea Place
PeaNut 176,832
November 2004
Posts: 12,224
Layouts: 2
Loc: gone to chemo with BethAnne
| Posted: 11/25/2012 4:56:59 PM
Every year my sweetheart of a MIL would send DH and I a check with a card, to "go out for a nice dinner." This was the first year we didn't get her card. She passed away this summer. She was incredibly thoughtful that way. |
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mdoc
Peaing under the Radar
PeaNut 61,691
January 2003
Posts: 11,823
Layouts: 0
Loc: In the Middle
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:00:58 PM
My MIL always gives us an anniversary present - generally something for our home. In the past she's given us crystal bowls, turkey platters and the like. My mother completed a set of Waterford stemware for us over the years on our anniversary, but hasn't given us anything since that set was complete. | |
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batya
Making the WWW better, one post at a time.
PeaNut 59,094
December 2002
Posts: 31,838
Layouts: 24
Loc: up on my high horse
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:04:02 PM
My ILs send us a check and a card every year which is very kind. |
OK. Newbie. This is how it works. If your post consists of 80% sanity, 10% stupidity and 10% all kinds of crazy, we immediately focus on the 20% b/c it discredits the 80%.
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Peabay
Happy now?
PeaNut 156,993
July 2004
Posts: 44,672
Layouts: 13
Loc: Connecticut
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:08:27 PM
My mom sends us a check every year. |
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sunluver
PeaAddict
PeaNut 387,904
August 2008
Posts: 1,841
Layouts: 0
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 5:10:45 PM
No. We acknowledge each other's anniversary with a card. | |
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perumbula
oooh, what you said!
PeaNut 27,933
January 2002
Posts: 10,109
Layouts: 97
Loc: bedlam
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:14:03 PM
no. My MIL has sent a card a couple of times and if we see them we get a "congratulations" but that's it. My parents have never even sent a card. We often get a personal congratulations though because we see them for birthdays around that time. It's only fair we don't get gifts though because we don't buy anniversary gifts for them either. |
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Deena714
Half of NSBR's favorite power couple
PeaNut 64,257
January 2003
Posts: 18,891
Layouts: 88
Loc: Your Mom's house
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:16:03 PM
My mother in law will send us cards. Sometimes a restaurant gift cert if she has the money.
My parents probably don't even know what date my anniversary is. |
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PEAS well w/ others
Legen - wait for it - dary
PeaNut 257,161
April 2006
Posts: 13,717
Layouts: 0
Loc: In my big comfy bed
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stace3
nothing to see here
PeaNut 60,064
January 2003
Posts: 10,767
Layouts: 71
Loc: Ontario
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:28:22 PM
My mother sends a card. My FIL gives us money to go out for dinner. When my MIL was still alive, we gave them gifts for milestone anniversaries. | |
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VivMarina
PeaFixture
PeaNut 242,276
January 2006
Posts: 3,013
Layouts: 0
Loc: SF Bay Area
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:31:22 PM
My step-mom has often bought us anniversary gifts but then stopped when it became too much along with grand kids etc. But then did for our 25th.
Now she also buys me and DH gift cards for mothers day and fathers day which I thought unusual but very sweet. | |
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kmk1112
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 11,642
February 2001
Posts: 7,914
Layouts: 66
Loc: Ohio
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 5:34:24 PM
In our family, anniversaries are just between the couple. I might say happy anniversary to my parents, and they might to me, but no gifts except between the spouses.
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rathernot
BucketHead
PeaNut 407,891
January 2009
Posts: 663
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:37:09 PM
no | |
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Miss Ang
I'm a Toilet Paper Pea. Are you?
PeaNut 26,443
January 2002
Posts: 11,487
Layouts: 398
Loc: Illinois
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:38:23 PM
My parents have given us $50 every year on our anniversary. We use it to go out for dinner. I've never expected it, but my mom always gives us a check inside of a card.
DH's parents do not give us a "gift" but they do give us a card.
We do not usually buy either parents a gift, but we do give a card. Once in awhile if I come across something that I knew they want as a "couple" I will buy it, but usually not. |
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LottaFire
PeaNut
PeaNut 555,986
May 2012
Posts: 471
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:42:45 PM
My inlaws give my husband & I a card every year with $25 check or gift card to a restaurant. I think it's nice but weird. My husband's siblings may give them anniversary gifts, I don't know, but we don't. I think anniversaries are between the 2 who are married! | |
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Captain K
AncestralPea
PeaNut 247,594
February 2006
Posts: 4,495
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:44:35 PM
No. His grandmother does send us a card, which is very sweet, but that's it. I think that is fine, the anniversary is between us. | |
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*Fresca*
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 204,709
May 2005
Posts: 2,717
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern Illinois
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:48:46 PM
Yes, my Mom sends us a check for our anniversary. My in-laws take us out to dinner and give us a small gift. My daughter got married this past June and we will be giving them a gift or check for their anniversary. |
*Debbie*
*****Today I will be happy as a bird with a frenchfry***** | |
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2peafaithful
People not perfection
PeaNut 35,457
April 2002
Posts: 27,840
Layouts: 0
Loc: Right where I should be
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:57:27 PM
My mom does a card and sometimes a gift. This year she gave a couple devotional and it arrived in the mail. | |
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busypea
boring + nerdy
PeaNut 52,817
October 2002
Posts: 25,197
Layouts: 145
Loc: Oregon
| Posted: 11/25/2012 5:58:43 PM
Our parents usually treat us to dinner or brunch out for our anniversary and we do the same for theirs. No tangible gifts (except at milestone anniversaries).
I don't know why it would be weird. | |
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ahiller
*Fingers crossed*
PeaNut 48,862
September 2002
Posts: 7,206
Layouts: 252
Loc: MI
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:00:53 PM
Ours do. Usually a restaurant gift card or something we need for the house. | |
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GrammarGirl
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 261,174
May 2006
Posts: 2,139
Layouts: 0
Loc: Maryland
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:01:56 PM
My one-year anniversary was in April. My parents didn't get me a gift; however, I do wish they had acknowledged it with a phone call or card! |
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PeasfulHeart
PeaAddict
PeaNut 228,402
October 2005
Posts: 1,524
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:07:18 PM
I also believe that anniversaries are mainly to be celebrated between those who have married each other.
With that said though, with our two married daughters we've started a tradition that I hope to keep on doing. I check out the Urban Spoon website for the cities where they live and send them a $50.00 gift card from a restaurant I think they would enjoy. Where my kids live $50.00 doesn't go very far, but I send the card with the intention that they will go out and have a couple of drinks and an appetizer or two on us and know that we celebrate with them. Easy-peasy, not a lot of $$ but fun to do. |
| Life is mostly froth and bubble, two things stand like stone. Kindness in another's trouble, courage in your own. -Adam Lindsay Gordon | |
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TexasScrap
Going Up
PeaNut 27,295
January 2002
Posts: 1,234
Layouts: 7
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:19:27 PM
My family does nothing, but my inlaws have always given us a card and something home oriented - place settings, sheets, towels.
I really appreciate the sentiment.
I love the idea of a restaurant gift card  |
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Shih Tzu Mommy
Million dollar camera, 10 dollar lock!
PeaNut 224,352
September 2005
Posts: 23,525
Layouts: 0
Loc: Right here
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:27:31 PM
Well they certainly would not buy them for their single children. 
Yes, my mother and my inlaws give a gift and card at every anniversary. We do the same for my inlaws. |
Dog people are a special breed! | |
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DanaLZ
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 146,346
May 2004
Posts: 2,597
Layouts: 126
Loc: Peatown, WI
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 6:28:30 PM
My parents and in laws have always given us a card with money to go out to dinner. We also buy them a card and either take them out or give a small gift on their anniversaries. |
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guzismom
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 31,617
March 2002
Posts: 9,341
Layouts: 59
Loc: southern new mexico
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:29:46 PM
No, my parents never got me an anniversary gift.
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Marilyn (now in New Mexico!!)
SCUBA diving and SCRAPPING Mom of two
Canon 5DMkII, 24-70 2.8L; 70-200 2.8L IS, 50 1.4;
my blog | |
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SDeven
Love Letters Pea
PeaNut 65,852
January 2003
Posts: 28,207
Layouts: 380
Loc: Nashville, TN!
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:29:47 PM
My inlaws have been sending us out to eat every year on our anniversary for 20 years now. They pay for dinner.
It's very sweet.
My parents send a card. |
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gavinsmom
AncestralPea
PeaNut 9,019
January 2001
Posts: 4,573
Layouts: 22
Loc: michigan
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:31:49 PM
My MIL got very put out with me one year because I didn't acknowledge their anniversary. She does send us a card on our anniversary but since I wasn't 'there' for their wedding, I think it is ridiculous to expect 'me' to remember their anniversary. This year was their 50th so I planned a small party for them...except she told me what she expected and how she and her sister did things for their parents 25th and 40th anniversary.
Personally, I feel the anniversary is between the couple. It is nice when parents acknowledge them as they were a big part of the wedding but to expect kids(let alone DIL!) to make a fuss, especially on an insignificant number anniversary is ridiculous! |
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sara b
Labby "Mom"
PeaNut 33,785
March 2002
Posts: 22,169
Layouts: 95
Loc: Indianapolis, IN
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:34:41 PM
My parents are both gone but when they were still alive they didn't even send a card. We get a card and gift from my in-laws every year. It's very sweet that they remember. And honestly, their gift isn't like some big elaborate expensive gift but it's usually something very thoughtful.
We take them a card with cash in it for their anniversary. |
Sara B
"I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the unhibited creatures we might be if we weren't certain we knew better" George Bird Evans
"Handle every stressful situation like a dog (aka Lab ): If you can't eat it or play with it, pee on it & walk away!" (author unknown)
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IScrapCrap
PeaAddict
PeaNut 570,639
October 2012
Posts: 1,035
Layouts: 0
Loc: pea formerly known as GIPfunny
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:35:20 PM
Not in my family. The general consensus is an anniversary is between the husband and wife. The exceptions would be if there was a big milestone and then it's a party. Even then, no one brings presents. | |
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meridon
PeaAddict
PeaNut 419,133
April 2009
Posts: 1,091
Layouts: 0
Loc: in the deep South
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:38:07 PM
We get a card from my parents every year and either they or my in-laws will babysit so we can go to dinner. My sister is a newlywed and I gave them a gift for their first anniversary mainly because I saw something I loved on Etsy and wanted an excuse to give it to her, but it will be cards from now on. We also send cards to our parents on their anniversaries, but no gifts. |
"Patience is knowing it will happen and giving it time to."---Rodney White
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*theCakeGirl*
PeaFixture
PeaNut 220
April 1999
Posts: 3,506
Layouts: 148
Loc: Upstate NY
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 6:41:45 PM
My parents always do something either a card with a check or a nice gift. Anniversaries and birthdays have always been an important day in their book. |
http://www.nomadescollection.com/denisem
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LonghornMom
BucketHead
PeaNut 453,032
January 2010
Posts: 598
Layouts: 0
 | Posted: 11/25/2012 6:47:04 PM
Mine do. My mom gets us a gift (usually something home related that she notices we need - like new pillowcases, etc). My ILs send a check. I think it's really nice if them!
ETA: I read through the responses and wanted to add that we also get ILs a gift. (My parents are no longer married). We LIKE to celebrate their marriage and dont feel like we are expected to gift them something. DH and I feel blessed that they are such a great model of a long and lasting marriage and want to let them know that by commemorating each year on their anniversary.. | |
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Miss Lerins Momma
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 151,660
June 2004
Posts: 13,102
Layouts: 38
Loc: KY
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(By The Sea)
peain' with my toes in the sand
PeaNut 12,495
March 2001
Posts: 12,765
Layouts: 438
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:51:41 PM
My in-laws have given us gift cards to restaurants and a card in the past. It's really thoughtful of them to remember our anniversary like that. | |
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Vicki7
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 9,287
January 2001
Posts: 2,011
Layouts: 30
Loc: Florida
| Posted: 11/25/2012 6:57:06 PM
We gave our son and daughter in law some money for their first anniversary to help with their belated honeymoon. Same with our daughter though hers was about their 3rd anniversary. We send anniversary cards to the couple that live out of town and sometimes take them out to dinner after their anniversary or sometimes with us on our anniversary dinner since they're close. I love celebrating with them cause I'm happy for them <3 My mother in law has never forgotten our anniversary, she sends a card and I get a card most years from my mom.
Vicki | |
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mightyme
AlienGreenPea
PeaNut 562,444
August 2012
Posts: 508
Layouts: 2
| Posted: 11/25/2012 7:40:05 PM
Yes my parents send us money every year. | |
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Aggiemom92
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 90,200
June 2003
Posts: 2,692
Layouts: 2
| Posted: 11/25/2012 7:51:28 PM
My mom and MIL do, but it wouldn't bug me if they didn't. |
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TXDancermom
PeaFixture
PeaNut 146,748
May 2004
Posts: 3,661
Layouts: 1
| Posted: 11/25/2012 7:52:20 PM
I don't believe I have ever in 30+ years gotten even a card from my parents or dh's.
and I might send a card, but probably not a gift when my kids marry and have anniversaries
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SMayer
PeaAddict
PeaNut 432,055
July 2009
Posts: 1,517
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 11/25/2012 7:55:49 PM
I think an anniversary is between the husband and wife. It would freak me out if anyone, family or friend, got us a gift or card. | |
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cmpeter
PEAceful Pea
PeaNut 14,521
April 2001
Posts: 34,372
Layouts: 31
Loc: Washington State
| Posted: 11/25/2012 10:25:29 PM
Gifts, no...but dh's mom always sends a card. |
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BuckeyeSandy
Old Dogs are Best!
PeaNut 92,987
June 2003
Posts: 22,364
Layouts: 364
Loc: With my dogs
| Posted: 11/26/2012 12:07:34 AM
Our mothers send cards.
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Sandy
Every MOM is a working mom!
"Retired" after 22 years of an Air Force Career
REMEMBER this Veterans Day
To quote Wayne Gretzky, "You miss 100% of the shots you never take."
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sueg
PeaFixture
PeaNut 13,202
March 2001
Posts: 3,950
Layouts: 32
Loc: an Aussie in Germany
| Posted: 11/26/2012 2:35:47 AM
I think my MIL sent us a card for the first few years - I remeber thinking the first year that it was a bit odd. My parents (well, mainly dad, as mum passed on only 3 years after we married) never sent us anything, except for out 25th.
I only have one married child - they've been married for 2 years next week. I do send them a gift around this time of year - the Christmas Markets open here this week and I am buying them a nativity set bit by bit. Last year the got the Holy Family; this year I'm adding an angel and maybe a shepherd or 2. By the time they've been married 5 year, we should have a reasonable cast! |
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pjynx
This space for rent
PeaNut 69,453
February 2003
Posts: 5,062
Layouts: 4
Loc: Wherever my mind wanders
| Posted: 11/26/2012 8:37:20 AM
My dad sends us a card. My mom calls and dh's mom doesn't do anything except maybe post a congrats msg on FB.
Pam |
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