My first attempt at handmade gifts apparently a bust!

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Posted 12/3/2012 by debinmaine in General Scrappin'
 

debinmaine
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Posted: 12/3/2012 8:34:09 PM
A couple of weeks ago we celebrated my mom's and 2 of her sisters birthday all at the same time. I gave all 3 of them handmade cards and not one of them made any kind of comment. My 2 aunts I printed out a subway art in the shape of a christmas tree...matted and framed them...and again..not really any kind of response.
Today I got a thank you card from one of them...thanking me for the frame and she said the frame now had her grandsons newest picture in it. :blink
Now I usually don't let things like this bother me....but I thought...wow...she really didn't understand that the gift was the subway art...and not just the frame....so I sent her a quick email just to let her know and explain to her the subway art...she replied back...yes, i read the words, thanks..you always do such nice things...but I still needed a frame for his picture.....

Have you ever had a response like this to something you've put your heart and thought into?....I'm sure it won't be the last time...but it kind of makes me feel like saying the heck with it and going and getting a card at the $ store next time

cdnmom6
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Posted: 12/3/2012 8:49:47 PM
Oh my. I'm so sorry. I've found some people are just better to buy for.
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Posted: 12/3/2012 8:55:20 PM
Yikes!!! It takes all kinds doesn't it. Sorry this happened to you






cdnscrapper
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Posted: 12/3/2012 10:39:37 PM
So sorry that your feelings were hurt, mine would be too. I learned a long time ago to only make things for people who appreciate it and buy things for those who do not. I wouldn't waste my time making her anything in the future with that kind of response as she obviously is someone who doesn't appreciate handmade gifts.



scrapprincess2002
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Posted: 12/3/2012 11:18:44 PM
yes i have those i make things for and those i buy for,,,
my parent i make things for my inlaws i buy for
i made mil a cute little brag book she has no clue where it got off to seriously htat is what she said to me!!
my mom has all her stuff proudly displayed in her living room.
you just have to figure out who understand your gifts and those who do not and dont let it hurt your feelings those who dont get it arent crafty and just dont understand...


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MerryMom937
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Posted: 12/4/2012 6:36:15 AM
Sometimes, the "subway art" concept doesn't appeal to everyone.

At least she noticed. And she did like the frame.

KBPea
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Posted: 12/4/2012 7:07:56 AM
Sorry to hear it didn't work out! They sound like cool gifts to me.

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Posted: 12/4/2012 7:33:14 AM
I'm sorry all your hard work didn't seem appreciated. I guess the saying is true...You live and learn.




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Posted: 12/4/2012 7:52:23 AM


Probably any of the peas would love your subway art.


Sometimes, the "subway art" concept doesn't appeal to everyone.




No, to the first poster and yes, to the second one.
I'm not a fan of the 'subway art'. If I liked the frame I'd probably have repurposed it, too.

As I said in another similar thread about homemade gifts - it's hit or miss just like it is with a store-bought gift. It's not about so much where it comes from (home vs store) most of the time, it's about a matter of taste and whether or not someone likes it. If she was in need of a frame there is the chance that if you had made one for that picture (had you known) she may have liked it.

I would not have hung up a framed subway art tree on my wall.



jrshapiro
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Posted: 12/4/2012 8:10:03 AM
That's a let down

Princess of Cute
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Posted: 12/4/2012 8:37:52 AM
Cringing for you. It's true it's not worth it for some to make handmade gifts. I did a few this year but it was either because I enjoyed the process or I really the knew the receiver would appreciate it. I guess it's good your aunt can be honest with you? Hugs.

fun4me
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Posted: 12/4/2012 8:52:41 AM
I am sorry this happened to you. This has taken me many years to learn ...when I give away my work, I give it because I felt good about making it - but have no expectations of how it will be received. This Christmas I made a few things to frame - but but some may keep the frames and toss the craft.

Most of the time I make scrapbook pages rather then cards, because both take me considerable time, and I realize the cards will probably be quickly tossed in the trash. I once gave someone a card that was very time consuming and received the response "You must have entirely too much time on your hands, to be able to spend it making that". I do make and give away bookmarks all the time. They are a joy for me to make & seem to be well received.

Having said all that - I treasure all the handmade gifts I have been given throughout the years. This Christmas as I decorated with many of the gifts that my dear friend made me, and my mother made me (both have passed this year) - I could picture their hands and hearts lovingly making their crafts.

Linda J

acepage
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Posted: 12/4/2012 11:08:25 AM
Ugggh. This is one of those times that you have every right to be frustrated, but have to know it's not a reflection on you. People just see things differently, and are into different things. Keep doing what you do, and what makes you happy!

MANY people will appreciate it!

northcarmen
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Posted: 12/4/2012 11:19:52 AM
Oh my word -- your aunt's response was just RUDE. Even if I didn't like a gift, I would still have sent a thank you for it, and not say I'd gotten rid of a part of the gift that I didn't care for. Yuck. So sorry that happened to you!

Carmen.


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Oh No!
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Posted: 12/4/2012 12:16:43 PM
Reminds me of the time I gave a friend who was in her 70s one of those small Creative Memories photo boxes. She has scrapbooked for years and love Creative Memories, but she just did not "get". I got a lovely thank you notee, thanking me for thinking of her, and for the gift saying something like, it is quite unusual, I am not quite sure what to do with it, but thank you.

Of course, I didn't make it, so it didn't hurt my feelings. I gave up hand made items years ago, when I realized they went to Goodwill or storage.

bluna
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Posted: 12/4/2012 12:30:54 PM
I think most scrapbookers/crafters experience this eventually. It seems only other crafters will ever truly appreciate a hand-made gift.

I do have to agree with Carmen, while it was nice that your aunt sent a thank you note, it seems rude to mention that she had dismantled the gift. Somethings are better left unsaid?!

Sorry that happened.


Let each woman exercise the art she knows.

~ Aristophanes (sort of)


bluna
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Posted: 12/4/2012 12:30:55 PM
I think most scrapbookers/crafters experience this eventually. It seems only other crafters will ever truly appreciate a hand-made gift.

I do have to agree with Carmen, while it was nice that your aunt sent a thank you note, it seems rude to mention that she had dismantled the gift. Somethings are better left unsaid?!

Sorry that happened.


Let each woman exercise the art she knows.

~ Aristophanes (sort of)


e_doe
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Posted: 12/4/2012 1:01:51 PM
I think the "I took it apart and used it elsewhere" reply is what gets my goat. I mean, regardless of whether the gift were handmade or not, you wouldn't say that.

Like if I got a hideous sweater, or even a really cute sweater, I wouldn't write in the thank you that I'd unraveled it to re-use the yarn. Or turned a purse into a phone case. Or smashed up the Wii just to see what was inside.

So I really wouldn't say it about something someone had put their time into. But again, differing tastes come into play.

And yes, I should have said "many of" instead of "any of" the peas would like your subway art.
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Posted: 12/4/2012 1:07:59 PM
Yikes. Sorry thats the response you got. Some people just don't get what ones into a handmade gift. That sounds like a lot of the people on my dads side. They don't get it either. So I've become very selective who gets handmade cards and gifts.


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Posted: 12/4/2012 1:54:38 PM

but I still needed a frame for his picture.....





Well, on the up side, I guess you know what to give her next time...


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KBPea
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Posted: 12/4/2012 1:58:55 PM

Oh my word -- your aunt's response was just RUDE. Even if I didn't like a gift, I would still have sent a thank you for it, and not say I'd gotten rid of a part of the gift that I didn't care for. Yuck. So sorry that happened to you!


That too.

nicolemartel
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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:24:25 PM
Oh wow, that's not cool!


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PickleballChamp
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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:31:08 PM
what a bummer! I'm so sorry! There is nothing worse than knowing what you made isn't appreciated! ugh!


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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:31:39 PM
I feel so bad for you. I'm sorry this happened to you. I don't make gifts anymore because they are not appreciated. So sad.


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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:39:21 PM
Oh, my, I'm so sorry! I understand your pain - and this is so true:

People just don't appreciate the effort that goes into handmade gifts
If a person does not make crafts themselves, then they have no idea the time and effort that it takes to create the crafts. Like many other peas have said, I am very careful to whom I give my handmade crafts. They are always given to friends and family members who craft themselves - and it's also something that I know they will like and can use.

In a similar situation, my DD and I set up at craft shows every now and then. DD makes crocheted items and I make various crafts, including paper crafts, handmade ornaments and handmade cards. We went to a craft show this weekend that was held at an elementary school (the first time we ever set up at the school). Although DD sold a couple items, I sold nothing at all. I've had low receipts before - but have never been to a craft show where I'd never sold anything. Very disappointing.

But, of course, gifting your handmade items to people you care about is a different situation - a very different kind of disappointment. Just remember that her remark was not a reflection of your quality of work; she probably just didn't "understand" subway art. At least you'll know better next time.

mommyladybug
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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:39:37 PM
I would be disappointed too! So sorry.



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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:48:21 PM

It seems only other crafters will ever truly appreciate a hand-made gift.


I disagree. There are plenty of people who appreciate a handmade gift that aren't crafters.
And I don't think being a crafter means you automatically appreciate a handmade gift. It

doesn't take us all the same amount of time to create. What takes me a few hours to do a simple layout could take someone else minutes to crank out. Some people can crank out a more complicated layout than mine in still half the time. So it's not really a matter of a fellow crafter understanding how much 'work' goes into making something because for some people it's little work. It could be something they threw together quickly that turned out well - or looks like it was thrown together. On the other hand, some stuff might take someone longer and still look thrown together.

I think too many assumptions get made about crafting and crafters.
Just because I craft doesn't mean I will always 'appreciate' a handmade gift. It's going to depend on a few things. Of course, I do have manners.



writermom1
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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:49:03 PM
I'm sorry that happened to you. It's understandably hurtful when your effort feels unappreciated.

That said art is a tricky gift at any time. Taste is subjective and many are particular about what they want to frame and display. Your aunt clearly is more invested in displaying photos than what you provided and she did say she likes the frame!

Is it possible she truly didn't "get" it and thought the framed Christmas print (?) was just a very lovely card that accompanied the gift of a picture frame to use as she wished?



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Posted: 12/4/2012 2:59:39 PM
That was incredibly rude of her.


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Posted: 12/4/2012 3:46:41 PM
Oh my goodness, that is so rude of her! Don't be discouraged by her. I understand that not everyone appreciates hanadmade gifts but to go out of her way to tell you she tossed your art is just obnoxious.



transprntbutterfly
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Posted: 12/4/2012 6:41:06 PM
I am so sorry that your gift was not appreciated.

I have learned that some people simply do not appreciate all of the time and love we put into handmade gifts and think of them as "cheap" (my mother for instance!) I am very selective who I give handmade gifts to and the list is pretty short.

SDeven
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Posted: 12/4/2012 6:47:55 PM
Oh my. That's just






LisaEDesign
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Posted: 12/4/2012 7:51:16 PM
I think that was very rude of her. She could use the gift as she chose but she didn't have to point out that she was only using the frame.

I'm sorry your gifts were appreciated. It is discouraging to make something for someone and they don't like it. However, it is wonderful to get real appreciation and recognition when you give a handmade gift to someone who really appreciates it. Hang in there and try again with someone else.


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debinmaine
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Posted: 12/4/2012 10:10:30 PM
Thanks everyone. I'm trying to look on the bright side...like some have said...at least she is using the picture frame!!!!

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Posted: 12/4/2012 10:14:51 PM
Uggh...so disappointing and rude. I will only ever give homeade stuff to people I KNOW will actually appreciate the time/effort. I'm so sorry that happened to you!


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