How honest are you with your PL?

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Posted 1/15/2013 by bscrap in General Scrappin'
 

bscrap
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Posted: 1/15/2013 9:36:28 AM
Do you document the bad along with the good? Do you show sad moments along with happy times? I was going to add something to my PL and it got me thinking if it was something i would want documented forever. I want to be honest in my scrapbooking but without giving away too much information. I'm curious to hear how others balance their PL.


Lisa

Live life so you have no regrets.

KikiPEA
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Posted: 1/15/2013 9:49:22 AM
Why are you worried about giving away too much information? This book is for YOU and should contain anything and everything you know you want to remember. If you do, add it, if you don't, don't.




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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/15/2013 9:56:55 AM
It's not my journal, it's for family viewing, so I'm not as candid about my own feelings as I would be in my personal journal. But yes, I put in temper tantrums, dirty laundry, and all those other less-than-perfect moments that make up our daily lives.

So if my mom visited and we had a fight, I'd put that she visited. I probably wouldn't mention the fight, but I also wouldn't lie and say what a happy visit it was.


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bscrap
PeaAddict

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Posted: 1/15/2013 10:01:34 AM
It's not just my album, I consider it to be my family's album. It is something about one of my kids and i guess i wouldn't want to include something that they might get upset about or wonder why the heck i felt the need to put it in the album. It's nothing bad or embarrasing, but it got me thinking about how much information other's include in their own albums.


Lisa

Live life so you have no regrets.

scases
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/15/2013 10:27:31 AM
I am documenting most stuff. But I won't be documenting the bad stuff such as the argument and problems I had with my 14 year old that resulted in her being grounded for a a week. Instead I skip over that and document the highlights of the week such as we got new bedroom furniture this week and we baked cookies, but not the sibling fighting while backing cookies.



this little piggy
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/15/2013 10:48:51 AM
I personally think that leaving out the not so good stuff is lying by omission. I want my PL album to reflect my real life. My real life has some not so wonderful moments. When I look back later, I want to see all the shades of the rainbow, not just 1 or 2. I want to see how I overcame challenges and endured the down times that made me stronger. That's my take on it FOR ME.

MomToE&E
PeaFixture

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Posted: 1/15/2013 10:54:51 AM
I'm doing the same as Susan. I want to keep it "real", but years from now it won't matter that my daughter and I argued over her phone/ipod/computer time. Years from now it will be fun to see a picture of that phone/ipod/computer and a line or two about her deep and abiding "love" of these objects.

It's hard to find that balance, I think, but I just ask myself what do I want to remember.

So this week there is going to be a picture of their dirty stinky socks that they leave all over the house along with a few choice words from me about my "love" of constantly finding them or (worse) picking them up!!! Again - I'm trying to keep it real, but put it in perspective.




IAmMikki
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/15/2013 11:13:50 AM
I keep it real to a degree. I have added pictures and journaling about when my daughter had a meltdown over doing homework and passed out crying. I have journaled about being laid off (twice) this past year. My grandpa passed away in 2011, I really didn't want to journal about it, and thankfully I didn't have to, he was a Football Coach for UNLV so I got to include the article from the front page of the Sports Section instead.

I am an optimist, so I try my best to put a positive spin on the negative events. "Because I got laid off, I was able to spend the last few days of summmer vacation with Kaylee and see her go off on her first day of school." "Kaylee hates doing homework" with a follow-up of "She's gotten much better!". I like following up on the bad with how it's being resolved.

scrappychar
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Posted: 1/15/2013 11:28:49 AM
I try to keep it real. My son is autistic and there are struggles with that. I don't say things to embarrass anyone, or hurt anyone, and there are definitely some things I skip on, but I do document the harder things and the happy things


Charlene

jenp1024
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Posted: 1/15/2013 11:42:33 AM
I include the good and the bad. When my stepfather passed away, I included my thoughts on his funeral, and the prayer card from the funeral home. On Veteran's Day I did a tribute to him in my PL (and yes, I know he's technically remembered on Memorial Day now, but I like to remember him on both).

Do I include petty arguments with my husband? It depends on my mood. Usually not, as they really aren't worth remembering.

If you want to include the good with the bad, do it. If not, that's ok to. It's your (and your families) book, and you can "gloss over" whatever you like.

Keianna
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Posted: 1/15/2013 12:40:56 PM
I think you have to be honest in a tasteful way. If I fought with DH, I would put a blurb about how hard marriage can be, but how rewarding it is in the long run.



michele st
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Posted: 1/15/2013 12:47:00 PM
I had to take my friend for her colonoscopy this morning and I was wondering if I should take a picture of her and say "took Jane for her procdure"

northcarmen
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/15/2013 2:10:32 PM
This is something I've struggled with, to a degree. Fights, I'd probably not include. Messes, yes -- I have a 2-year-old, so at least a few of the messes are worth documenting. Things I've tried that haven't quite worked, yes -- like our failed attempt to make a snowman with snow that was too dry and powdery, and the huge spill of hot chocolate. Sometimes I've alluded to something difficult that's happened, like mentioning a very difficult phone call and how DH made butterfly-shaped pancakes to help me feel better. My uncle's funeral is in my album, as is a hospital visit (with a not so lovely photo of me in my hospital bed). I also did a fold-out journaling card with reflections on a family friend's illness, and I also documented 9/11 and Newtown. I have one blank week in March, when my mom said some very hurtful things to me and my husband, and I haven't figured out what to do with that. I don't want to gloss over the struggles of parenthood too much, because hopefully my daughter will read/inherit these books some day and I want her to see that parenting is hard but worthwhile. The e-mail conversation with my mom -- that I will tread gently with. It related to something that is an important theme in our albums, so it needs to be included somehow, but I haven't figured out yet (and it was 10 months ago, so I need to hurry up and figure it out!).

Carmen.


"Hold to the now, the here, through which all future plunges to the past." - James Joyce

FLCindy
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Posted: 1/15/2013 3:38:50 PM
I don't leave out much. However, you can substitute words that state what happened but doesn't contain the emotion, unless you want the emotion in your journaling.

A few words I've substituted:

Fight=does not agree
Struggled=challenged

I use "Oh Life" to journal.
It sends you a daily email prompt that asks, "How'd your day go?"
In a reply email, I usually state:
who
what
where
when
and why, if needed.

Journaling on a daily basis tends to box the emotion for that day. Sometimes, we don't want to face our emotion. Putting it off makes it grow bigger and bigger, even though we want to journal it. Journaling it every day gives me the choice to "take it off the shelf or keep it on the shelf."

It's also okay to state: happy, sad, worried, angry, confused, unsure, wary, excited, ect....Another way to describe the emotion is to journal what behavior(s) I observe. "Tears ran down her face" or "Mom trembled when she looked at the picture. she told me Grandpa came home late every night even though he worked 8am-5pm." You can guess the emotion from the description of the behavior.

Another rule: If an adult tells me how they feel, then I may add it to journaling. Otherwise, that's their emotion. I feel I don't have a right to define their emotion.

With kids, it's different. As parents, we pretty much know their emotions and why they behave the way they do.





leftturnonly
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Posted: 1/15/2013 3:50:42 PM

I personally think that leaving out the not so good stuff is lying by omission.


I have no problem with this in a scrapbook.




If PC is the way to get to Heaven, I'm going straight to Hell.



Cat E. Clysm
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Posted: 1/15/2013 3:54:19 PM
I include everything, but in my case, PL is just for me - I don't have family per se. For example, Friday I had a brain MRI, and I wanted to include a picture of the (terrifying) machine. That was not allowed, so I convinced the tech to let me take HIS picture, to at least document the experience.

The tech told me that the day before , a woman wanted to take a photo of her husband inside the machine. (She wasn't allowed, either.) I had to wonder if that lady is doing Project Life too! I also wondered how her husband felt about having his picture taken in those circumstances!

crimsoncat05
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Posted: 1/15/2013 5:18:57 PM
slight hijack: to Cat. E. Clysm (I like your peaname, by the way! )

if you want a picture of an MRI machine, you could always use Google images to find a photo that you could print out and include. Of course, it won't be your specific MRI machine, but still... you'll have an image of an MRI machine. I've done that before, if I forgot to take a photo.

(For example, we just got a couple new Blu-Ray box sets of a television show we love, so rather than taking a poorly-lit photo of them, I'm going to include a good image of the box that I found on a website.)




"Accepting anything without question is the antithesis of critical thinking and education. ~wren*walk, 8/20/12"


kshenkar
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Posted: 1/17/2013 2:11:15 PM
Basically, I include the things I WANT to remember. Which is not everything



Sophikins
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/17/2013 5:32:40 PM
When I was doing PL/P365 in 2009 my 15 yr old dd had a traumatic brain injury from a ski accident. She was in a coma and we did not know if she would ever recover. Those days are big blanks in my book. In fact, looking at that album now, the blanks for those days represent what my life was like better than any photo or even journaling.

After she woke up and began to recover, and when most of her facial bruises were healed, I started to take photos of her with her visitors, and some of her room in the rehab hospital with all the cards, posters, flowers etc. Much later, when she had follow up appointments with her doctors and therapists I took some photos of them together to remember the recovery process.


M

akenyon
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/17/2013 7:13:55 PM
Honest. But I scrap for me. No kids, so I don't worry about it. I frequently put journaling in envelopes, pockets, etc. My dad had lung cancer and not including it would seem dishonest. Now that he is in remission I am glad I included it. Even if I never read that journaling again writing it down help me deal.


Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.

Henry David Thoreau

Caitlynsmommy
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Posted: 1/17/2013 8:09:03 PM
I am pretty honest. Life is messy and hard sometimes. I want my kids to know that sometimes I just wanted to be alone and that is JUST FINE. I want them to know ME and my Husband as WE are not just as parents, does that make sense?


~Crystal/
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Pinkalicous
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Posted: 1/17/2013 8:10:16 PM
following this..


Queen of Pink in my house of blue.

Gnakersten
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Posted: 1/17/2013 8:15:09 PM
I was not brutally honest in my 2012 PL...I omitted several large difficult events and I regret it. So this year I am going to include even those hard moments because life is not all happy and colorful...I want it to be more balanced.

Brooklyns Mama
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/17/2013 8:17:36 PM
I will be.
Like this week I have barely been able to do any work or photos bc I have been helping my sister w her brutal divorce/custody. Therefore I do some hidden journaling about that.


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torrrific
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Posted: 1/17/2013 8:33:46 PM
I'm pretty honest with my PL. I obviously don't include things like fights or arguments, but I do include some not so "pretty" or "happy" events.

For example, last year for my PL included 3 funerals. They weren't things I wanted to pretend didn't happen.

susank12
PEAlicious

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Posted: 1/17/2013 9:53:27 PM
I am going to keep it real, documenting the passing of my mother-in-law last Sunday morning, her funeral and wake tomorrow and Saturday, the break in of our car (luckily nothing in it and it wasn't locked so no damage), and anything else that shows its ugly head. I will touch on it and if I feel like going in depth then I will. I want to be honest with what is going on this year and being PRESENT (OLW) in my life.


I'm an old pea with a forgetful memory (can't remember old login info)....please cut me some slack LOL!!!

lisaplus5
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/17/2013 10:11:51 PM
I am so very honest and real. My family needs to be real and honest and it will be wonderful to look back and see all God has brought us through!
My First 2013 post





www.createfor7.blogspot.com

LesMcF
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Posted: 1/17/2013 10:11:53 PM
I am a firm believer that you don't have to put everything in your books. You are not under oath when you scrapbook, you are the editor. When my middle son left for college he looked through all my books before he left (and he complained when I didn't journal enough but that is another story). Here is my advice, if you want your kid reading it before he or she leaves for college, put it in. Not everything needs to be scrapped.


Leslie

My life is an exercise in futility but it's the only exercise I get.

Lynne76
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/18/2013 12:31:50 PM
I document the bad along with the good. But I am aware when I do it that it's not a private diary and others will be reading it. So I censor sometimes. But I am honest. Like I put a blog post I read one week that spoke to me about the struggles of motherhood. I'm aware my son could read it one day and think it's his fault or something, but I also realize that he might read it as an adult and realize we had bad days as parents, and that's normal!

An example of something I didn't journal is my nephew's first birthday. We went to his party, so I had photos, but there's some family tension between some other family members that were all there and things were awkward. So I didn't want to journal that, because I didn't really want to be reminded of that part of the day. I just wanted to remember the celebration instead.


=)
Lynne

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Cat E. Clysm
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Posted: 1/18/2013 12:55:06 PM
crimsoncat05 - Thanks, I did google MRI and printed a little pic to include on my layout. I like it because it's a diagram showing a person lying inside the machine.

During 2009 when I did Project 365, I was allowed to take a photo of the mammogram machine. It's the same hospital, so maybe their rules changed.

drakumel
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/18/2013 1:20:10 PM
I want to remember "highlights" and not my troubles, so I skip troubles.
But if the week wasn't the best one I will just write that "not the best one" without details.

itsmeamanda
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/18/2013 1:39:53 PM
I try to be relatively honest, but a lot of times I will hide journaling in a folded journal card or bag.
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Cat E. Clysm
PeaAddict

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Posted: 1/18/2013 2:06:58 PM
I have a for-sale flyer from 1929 when my grandparents were forced to sell their farm in Colorado, at a great loss, because they had to move to Minnesota where my grandmother was treated (unsuccessfully) for severe diabetes at the Mayo Clinic.

I sure wish they had left a written record of their experiences during this very difficult and painful time.

My grandmother died before I was born, and my grandfather when I was a teenager - and I wasn't interested then in the "olden days." Now I would give anything to talk to them about their struggles in life. So I think it is really important to document the bad as well as the good things in your life. Someday your children and grandchildren will want to know more about your experiences.

MrsKLewis
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Posted: 1/18/2013 4:00:49 PM
My PL is a photo album. Not a diary. I add notes to remember details.


"Blessed are the children of Scrapbookers, for they shall inherit the Scrapbooks."
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senoritascrapper
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/18/2013 5:58:26 PM
Maybe it depends on what you use PL for. I use it as a family record of events. Everyone contributes and looks at it. I do not include sad or difficult moments from my own life. I have a journal for that.

peasacake
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/18/2013 6:02:31 PM
I put my very unhappy birthday in there and have put a few other things. I definitely don't put everything. I don't know any rhyme or reason what I put in there, but I do put less than happy things.
Not sure why the tech's wouldn't let you take pictures. I got pictures when my son had an mri done and my friend is battling cancer and she has pictures from everything. She had a gamma knife ray done and that helmet looked like something from space. I guess it is who you get.


Kim
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IScrapCrap
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/18/2013 6:05:23 PM

It's not just my album, I consider it to be my family's album. It is something about one of my kids and i guess i wouldn't want to include something that they might get upset about or wonder why the heck i felt the need to put it in the album. It's nothing bad or embarrasing, but it got me thinking about how much information other's include in their own albums.


I feel the same way as well. I also have my albums in my living room for anyone to look through. I know it's not a popular opinion, but I don't like the bad in my family scrapbooks. They are my escape to read about the good stuff when I'm having a bad day. If I want to scrap the bad, I keep those away from everyone. My kids would not appreciate me documenting some of the things that have happened to them.

*Delphinium Twinkle*
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Posted: 1/18/2013 6:15:15 PM
I document the good and the bad. My life is not all sunshine and roses. I see no reason to make it seem as if it is in my albums.


Bethie
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doesitmatter?
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Posted: 1/18/2013 7:48:48 PM
I keep it real but that doesn't mean that I choose to include everything. Depends what / who is going on.


Child of God, follower of Jesus, and so thankful for His presence in my life <><
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