I feel embarrassed and ashamed.

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Posted 4/30/2013 by LolaLayout in General Scrappin'
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LolaLayout
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 544,018
February 2012
Posts: 2,407
Layouts: 1

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:06:40 AM
My friend confided in me that my layouts are childish and repetitious, and look like a five year old did them.

I just don't know how to take that kind of brutal honesty.

This is not a friend that scrapbooks, but has had a successful career as a graphic artist.

Scrapbooking is my only hobby. I've done it for nearly a decade, and had thought I wasn't half-bad at it. I know it's only my friend's opinion, and that art is subjective, but dang, if that didn't hurt just a little.

And now I feel embarrassed at the mini albums I've given as gifts through the years.

I just feel humbled, and embarrassed. I feel like I'm not good enough for my supplies, if you could possibly understand what I mean by that.

I'm not looking for validation, or a pile-up on my friend, I guess I just wanted an ear. Thanks for listening.
------------------------------------------------------------------------


ETA my reply from page 3:

Thank you all for your kind words, and "being on my side" so to speak.

Yes, my friend isn't quite a friend at all, more an acquaintance that I feel I need to give space.

As to how she saw my album, she just flipped it open. It was sitting on the coffee table, and she stopped by to ask about a school trip both of our children will be taking soon. I hadn't offered it to her to look at, and was just as surprised as all of you when she criticized it. I tried to laugh it off, shrug my shoulders, and just kinda mumble, "Yeah, it's just a hobby," as I closed the book from her scrutiny and put it on a bookshelf as I was walking her back towards the front door to leave.

Looking back, maybe I wish I had said something about how rude she was, but it just caught me off guard, and I didn't want to make bad blood with someone who has a child that also goes to my child's small school.


And though I thank those that said my layouts were good, you must give all of your praise to the talented peas here that posted them in the gallery. I can only be credited with having good taste in "liking" their work that i am so inspired by. As others have stated, I haven't posted any layouts of my own.


Thank you again for all your good thoughts and support.



*Stop the glorification of busy*

seasonscraps
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 113,955
October 2003
Posts: 2,099
Layouts: 29

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:11:11 AM
I guess it's a good thing she doesn't have to like them!!

Scrap the way you love to scrap - you're doing this for you. Try not to think about what she said (what was even her point?!) and enjoy your work. And I am sure your gifts were well received.

hugs!



mikklynn
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 294,285
January 2007
Posts: 2,833
Layouts: 1
Loc: Minnesota

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:12:59 AM
Sorry, but I am going to "pile up" on her. Your friend is no friend. That is her OPINION. What a beeyotch.

Do not let someone else spoil your fun. Don't give her that power over you!


Lynn



WorkingClassDog
Rick Springfield Junkie

PeaNut 78,429
March 2003
Posts: 16,052
Layouts: 5
Loc: Mountain High Pea

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:13:40 AM
To me a friend would never ever say that... EVER. All my friend's scrap differently... some may not be my style or my style may not be what they like but we would never say it was bad/childish or anything to put down another person's work. That is mean, rude and I wouldn't consider someone a friend who would say that.



JanGram
Lucy's Mom

PeaNut 63,309
January 2003
Posts: 45,677
Layouts: 1,370
Loc: Kansas City, MO

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:13:44 AM
I'm sorry that she said that to you. Sounds like she could use some lessons in tact - and how to keep her critisisms to herself unless asked. Don't feel embarrassed about your scrappy gifts. I bet the recipients thought they were the best present ever.


Jan




princessesmith
PeaNut

PeaNut 557,720
June 2012
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Loc: Silver Spring, MD

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:13:59 AM
I'm so sorry your "friend" made you feel that way. I don't want to gang up on her, but if she was your friend she would not have said that to you. I personally feel that was very mean Keep doing what you are doing and don't let ANYONE tell you any different. It's your hobby and if you like your pages, then that's all that matters

Islandscrapper1
PeaNut

PeaNut 581,519
February 2013
Posts: 278
Layouts: 0

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:22:54 AM
I am so sorry someone said that to you, no one should say that, certainly not someone who is a friend. Perhaps because she is a graphic artist, she has her own style that differs from yours. Perhaps she thinks her style appeals to everyone, perhaps she simple doesn't "get" your style.

Art appeals to everyone on a different level, just like music. Not everyone like Monet, or Dali, or Picasso. Some people like country, or rap, others say its not even music. Please do not let one opinion stop you from creating YOUR art.

Create for yourself, for the enjoyment, to hold those memories, to remember the moment, and do not worry what anyone else says.

dalayney
Shut the PEA UP! Yer gettin me all twitterpaited!

PeaNut 123,471
January 2004
Posts: 16,907
Layouts: 165
Loc: Husker by Heart in WI

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:26:18 AM
It's not about what she thinks of your scrapbooking, or style of scrapbooking. As long as YOU like it, get enjoyment of it and are happy with it, that is all that counts.

I get flack too. "You're stuff is too cutesy." Kiss my cutesy hiney.



RonaDT
BucketHead

PeaNut 67,751
February 2003
Posts: 555
Layouts: 33
Loc: Milton, Ontario

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:28:34 AM
What a mean thing to say. Horrible.

As others have said, you scrapbook for you. Maybe your style is not at the graphic artist's extremely high ridiculous threshold (she sounds like a bit of a snob perhaps), but who cares? I have a friend who has a very basic, simple style, but she loves her pages, and enjoys creating them. That's the important thing.

So sorry your feelings were hurt. Nobody deserves that.



Rhonda in TX
BucketHead

PeaNut 339,706
September 2007
Posts: 775
Layouts: 18
Loc: Houston, TX

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:28:56 AM
Wow. Just...wow. What kind of friend would be so hurtful? I'm sorry she caused you to doubt yourself. If you're happy with your pages, that's ALL that matters. Like others have said, there are all kinds of different styles out there. Just because yours doesn't appeal to her does not mean that it doesn't have value.

I'm just stunned that someone could be that cruel.


Been scrappin' for 15 years
Homeschool mom of 2 - DS (16) and DD (15)

mrscraftyadams
Will I ever get to Buckethead?!

PeaNut 294,422
January 2007
Posts: 405
Layouts: 52
Loc: Bristol, TN

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:30:29 AM
I am so sorry your "friend" said this to you. I can't believe someone would say this! I don't know how I would have reacted if someone was so rude to my face. Everyone has their own style of scrapbooking (or any kind of arts/crafts). It's all very subjective. There are certain types of arts and crafts that I am drawn to, and others that I do not particularly like. However, I would never discourage someone by saying their stuff is bad. I appreciate all forms of creativity, though it may differ from my own.

I hope you never give your "friend" a mini album though! In fact, I would never share any scrapbook page with her. I understand how you could feel embarrassed - when I give a homemade gift of any kind, there is a feeling of vulnerability - what if the recipient doesn't like it? Or doesn't want to use it? But even if the mini album isn't their style, I'm sure the recipients of your mini albums have been grateful and happy to receive such nice gifts from you. It takes a lot of time and effort to put together such a thoughtful gift.

Did you tell your "friend" how much her comment hurt? Is she aware of how rude her comment was?



Mrs. Crafty Adams
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melanell
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 26,836
January 2002
Posts: 19,090
Layouts: 86

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:31:11 AM
I'm sorry he/she said that to you. It was certainly not a nice way to treat a friend.


I am sure others have found joy in the albums you have made them over the years. Please don't let this friend be the fly in that spoils your scrapping "ointment".

Scrapping brings you happiness. Don't allow one nasty comment to ruin that for you.


{{{hug}}}



tleaw
BucketHead

PeaNut 433,409
August 2009
Posts: 994
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Loc: So Cal

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:31:19 AM
I'm with the others and I wanna pile up on her!!! That is NO friend!!! You have no reason to feel bad about your creations!!! Especially gifts that you have made and given with love!!! I can't believe she would say that to you and she must be feeling really insecure about something to take that out on you and try to make you feel bad. My guess is she is jealous of your creativity!!! I'm sorry she hurt your feelings!!!

lumos
BucketHead

PeaNut 435,926
August 2009
Posts: 627
Layouts: 0
Loc: Ontario, Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:34:01 AM
Your friend is a professional graphic artist - that's way different from a hobby scrapbooker. She is really arrogant to judge someone else's work, in the first place, but to try to compare it to something she was trained for, studied for, and does professionally is just crazy, rude, and, again, arrogant.

Because professional ballerinas dance The Nutcracker, does that make the amateur community production worthless and a waste of time? Should a person who loves to draw give up because they can't make art like Van Gogh (who was ridiculed in his time, by the way)? What about a photographer - hey, I'm no Ansel Adams, but that doesn't mean I can't do my best and have fun.

Plus, maybe to her your work is amateurish, but to the other people you know who are NOT professional graphic designers, your work may be inspiring and impressive and may make THEM feel like they're not very good.

My point is - it's dumb to compare, and your friend was trying to raise herself up by putting you down. What you call brutal honesty, I call petty disregard for other people's feelings.

Plus, what's wrong with repetitious? And does she have her memories recorded like you do yours? I'm sure the people you gave your mini albums to love them because they came from YOU - with time, care, and love. And you recorded a piece of history or a memory for them. That's way better than designing flyers or whatever else a professional graphic artist does.

elphalba
PeaNut

PeaNut 31,845
March 2002
Posts: 463
Layouts: 53
Loc: Poconos PA

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:35:32 AM
I'm a brutally honest person with very little filter however there is a huge difference between honesty and cruelty. And there's no question that what she said was cruel.


Erica
Mom to six kids, two pugs and a cat
2013 Layouts Completed: 324 (and counting but no project life...)
2012 Layouts Completed: 219


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finally~a~mama
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 438,682
September 2009
Posts: 2,989
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Posted: 4/30/2013 10:36:01 AM
Wow. Too bad no one taught her the "if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all" rule....




Oh No!
BucketHead

PeaNut 82,790
April 2003
Posts: 913
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Posted: 4/30/2013 10:38:26 AM
Your friend is not a friend and she is rude.

There is a vast difference between what a professional, graphic artist spits out on her $1,000+ software and the beautiful heart felt, hand crafted pages that you create. If you wanted slick and glossy, you could have that. You have chosen another, more appealing route.

You have nothing to be ashamed of and everything to be proud of.

Want me to smack her for ya?

IAmMikki
BucketHead

PeaNut 520,674
September 2011
Posts: 723
Layouts: 7
Loc: Las Vegas, NV

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:46:03 AM
I know there are a lot of people in this world that approach things with "Brutal honesty", but that seems a bit mean-spirited. I don't have any friends that scrapbook, but I share my layouts on Facebook and Twitter and I have never had any of them critisize. I understand that as a graphic designer, seeing scrapbook layouts could be difficult, working in the industry of design changes how you view things. If you look at a magazine on the newsstand, rather than admire it for the content it's "the headline isn't placed properly" "yikes! Why did they put the pictures like that!" but you I don't agree with calling your layouts childish.

Shimelle and Paperclipping Roundtable has actually addressed "repeatative" before, noting that magazines ect will pick 3-4 "layout designs" and a small amount of fonts and use those consistancy, it provides good flow.

I think the most important thing is YOU enjoying your layouts. Do you like the way your memories are preserved? Not taking into account what your "friend" said, do you like the way they look? If there is something you wish was different, seek it out, incorporate more design principles or more art techniques if you like. If you're happy though, don't let ANYONE bring you down. You are doing something you love and you're loving doing it. The design or the products or photo placement aren't what are the most charished part of your scrapbooks.

besskinn
PeaAddict

PeaNut 471,901
June 2010
Posts: 1,666
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Loc: Hillsboro, TX

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:46:19 AM
What?? This was a "friend"? I'd be insulted and furious. This is a hobby and like previous posters have said there is a huge difference between being a graphic artist as a profession and being a crafter as a hobby. In my not-so-humble opinion, your friend was way out of line.


~Deedee
My blog: The Adventures of Me

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revirdsuba
Wise~old Pea

PeaNut 17,460
June 2001
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Loc: Central NJ

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:47:31 AM
I am sitting here with my mouth hanging open with no words to say about your friend's(?) comments.. PLEASE never, ever share you work with that person again! You have created for you and your family, you are preserving your memories for them also. Enjoy what you do.

Oh No!
BucketHead

PeaNut 82,790
April 2003
Posts: 913
Layouts: 0

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:51:34 AM
I suggest you give her a mini album on MANNERS.

lumos
BucketHead

PeaNut 435,926
August 2009
Posts: 627
Layouts: 0
Loc: Ontario, Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:55:29 AM

I suggest you give her a mini album on MANNERS.


I love this! That would be awesome.

mjthescrapbooker
PeaNut

PeaNut 361,706
February 2008
Posts: 290
Layouts: 98
Loc: Ottawa, Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 10:55:29 AM
I am in shock too! I must be naive, but I never thought somebody would say something like that to anybody!



She was rude and inconsiderate. What was she trying to achieve by telling you that? Surely she must have known nothing good would come out of it! I am very sorry your feelings are hurt.

I think what is important is that you like this hobby and enjoy it. You don't have to care about what others have to say about it and about your projects.


My blog: http://lescreationsdemariemily.blogspot.com

Belia
PeaAddict

PeaNut 503,375
March 2011
Posts: 1,411
Layouts: 3

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:02:35 AM
Your friend was mean.

Please, please, please, PLEASE don't let her mean and rude comments discourage you from your hobby. The whole tone of your post is so sad. I look at some of the elaborate, beautiful, intricate pages that use the most up-to-date materials and techniques in the gallery and think "Holy crow! My pages don't look ANYTHING like that!" And then I go back to my simple, flat, multi-photo, holiday-based LOs. I even still use a good sticker sneeze once in a while!

And I like them! I just did a page using paper from 2003 and a boring die-cut that took me about 10 minutes. But it told the story that I wanted it to and is in my scrapbook and I like it!

I would love to see some of your work. I bet it's perfectly fine.

Please, please, please don't let anyone make you feel bad about your hobby.

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

Justlulu
Garden Girl

PeaNut 232,474
November 2005
Posts: 6,578
Layouts: 797
Loc: Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:03:25 AM
Oh my heart. That was cruel of her.

I can't even fathom why a "friend" would say that. Scrapbook pages are about love, not design. They are not meant to be masterpieces, they are meant to tell a story, and you get to have a bit of fun while doing it. If you have fun? Then keep doing what you love to do!

Big huge hugs to you!!


Come visit me at http://www.paperlulu.com

myboysnme
Living life on the left

PeaNut 69,081
February 2003
Posts: 7,959
Layouts: 1

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:05:09 AM
What was the context of this conversation? Was she just looking at them and blurted this out? Was she talking about scrapbook layouts in general?

In any case, I have seen many scrapbookers whose work I thought was pretty awful. Sometimes I do layouts I don't care for and I do think I have some reptitious elements that I just sort of chock up to being my style. I have never told someone directly that I thought their stuff was bad, but if they asked me I would ask if they want some suggestions to make things a bit better. They never ask though - they love their style, or lack of it.

So if you like your pages, then don't compare yourself to a trained professional graphic artist. That's like comparing a ceramic Christmas tree to a bronze sculpture. Or a kid tossing a ball in the backyard to a professinoal athlete. That is why one thing is a hobby and one is a profession.

I'm just curious how this came to be something she thought was a helpful thing to say.


My choice is to not take it personally - people have opinions. Particularly people here.-Peabay 12/29/11
I know this is assuming, but I'm really starting to think you are one of those "entitled" peas - Dalayney 4/2/12
When someone elects you Queen of Two Peas, then you can make the rules. - Sue_Pea 12/22/13
"Myboysnme,...I bow down to you, oh queen of the scrapping goodness" - Irish Eyes 3/9/14
"Myboysnme -- ... Whoa. I bow to thee." - Jill S 4/26/14









fiddlerontheroof
BucketHead

PeaNut 286,696
December 2006
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Loc: Washington, DC

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:08:13 AM
I'm sorry that happened. We don't expect our friends to criticize us like that. Sure, your pages may not be her style, but that doesn't mean that they're "bad." She accomplished nothing by hurting your feelings like that. And it makes me wonder why she felt compared to talk to you like that.

If your pages make you happy, then continue to do them exactly the way you are doing them. They are made with love.




Casii
CasiioPEA

PeaNut 128,923
February 2004
Posts: 8,661
Layouts: 112
Loc: Maryland

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:08:33 AM
Regardless of what context the conversation took place in, she showed you who she is and she is not a friend to you.

Move on to healthier relationships where someone doesn't try to tear you down. And scrapbook for you, not to impress anyone else!


Ciao,
Casii

Granny Panty Chic

Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it. ~Mark Twain


Mom2sons
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 417,168
March 2009
Posts: 2,192
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Loc: South East of Disorder

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:10:28 AM

To me a friend would never ever say that... EVER.


^^^ That! I'm sorry but that person is not a friend. I hope you can ignore her hurtful comments and realize she is lacking something in her life for her to feel justified in making such hurtful remarks.

If it were me this person would no longer be in my "world."

{{{hugs}}}
Shara

Jenny Lilac
For Esme with Love and Squalor

PeaNut 45,964
August 2002
Posts: 11,736
Layouts: 280
Loc: Pioneer Valley, Massachusetts

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:15:47 AM
Wow with friends like that who needs enemies? You can't let yourself take her coments to heart. I don't see any layouts posted but I am sure they are beautiful and made with love.



corriew
PeaNut

PeaNut 480,957
September 2010
Posts: 155
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:17:54 AM
First let me say this person is not a friend, I would never say that to a stranger let alone someone I called a friend and I am known for being the type to give an honest.opinion when asked. Secondly I want to mention that many people with graphics training look down on scrapping in general amd scoff at the idea of it being art

luvmythree
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 223,222
September 2005
Posts: 2,894
Layouts: 47
Loc: Kansas

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:22:27 AM
How stinking mean. I'm sorry she said that, I hope you don't take what she said to heart.

I've been told the same types of things but ya know what? I don't care anymore I'm not doing MY hobby to make anyone else feel better.

So you keep on scrapping and to heck with what anyone else says.


Kirsten mom to~
Alexandria 20
Ethan 10
Owen 8 CFC syndrome,cp 29.5 wk preemie
Expecting my first grandbaby May 2013!
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purpledaisy
Calm

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November 2003
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:26:51 AM

Your friend is a professional graphic artist - that's way different from a hobby scrapbooker. She is really arrogant to judge someone else's work, in the first place, but to try to compare it to something she was trained for, studied for, and does professionally is just crazy, rude, and, again, arrogant.
I definitely agree with this. You have absolutely nothing to hang your head about or be ashamed! As long as you like the pages and projects you are doing, that is all that matters. That is why people (in this hobby) shouldn't compare styles, etc. What works for one person may not work for another person. But that is okay! As for the gifts you given, they were made with love right? That is what matters. Chin up, girl!


Becca

May we be consumed with the Creator of all things rather than with things created.

6 rings - no cheating! Go STEELERS!

Holding a grudge is letting someone live rent-free in your head.

katebroccoli
PeaFixture

PeaNut 325,160
July 2007
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:26:56 AM
I'm so sorry. The Peas are right - she is no friend to you. That's not honesty, that's cruelty.

If your pages make YOU happy, that is what is important. ((Hugs))


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anmolhai
AncestralPea

PeaNut 40,642
June 2002
Posts: 4,539
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Loc: Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:28:17 AM
What kind of friend is she WHo says that kind of thing to anyone

Sorry she made you feel that way . You scrap for YOU so don't let anyone make you feel bad about how you do it. Chin UP and scrap ON!!!


Live life !

PolarGreen12
AncestralPea

PeaNut 319,638
May 2007
Posts: 4,017
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Loc: Tulsa, OK

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:29:55 AM
*hugs*
What a hateful thing to say. If that was my friend I'd be telling her to kick rocks.
Keep making layouts the way you like and enjoy the hobby.


*Andrea*
My Pinterest





loveforpitbulls
PeaNut

PeaNut 577,998
January 2013
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Loc: Northern California

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:30:00 AM
Everyone here as pretty much covered all the points I would want to get across to you.

What a terrible, awful thing to say. I know my scrapping is not the best. I drool over the work of all the talented ladies here, but it is still my work and I am so proud of it. I do it for myself and no one else. I am sure your work is gorgeous, and fits your style.

Don't let the haters bring you down!


-Erika

Be Happy For This Moment. This Moment Is Your Life.

alone_inacrowdedroom
What are you looking at?

PeaNut 477,798
August 2010
Posts: 1,590
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:35:42 AM
Way back in jr high, we called people like this "frenemies". They'd be sweet to you most of the time, but would get cruel barbs in every once in awhile that hurt you to the core. Why the jr high analogy? Because that's the way your friend was acting by saying something so "Mean Girls" to you!!

I had a very close friend that didn't start out being judgmental in that way, but became very cruel after several years. I gave her the benefit of the doubt for awhile but there came a point where I couldn't deal with the negativity and had to cut ties with her. I haven't looked back, and I'm a lot happier for it. I don't know your whole situation, but it's something to think about.

I would imagine most of the people you gifted your minis to weren't graphic designers, and appreciated the time and heart you put into their gift. They probably weren't worried about if you were executing a perfect visual triangle on every spread. Don't let this stop you from creating in your own style!

Also, repetition is a design principle, and the repetition of elements and placement adds cohesion to an album. Maybe your "friend" should go back through her notes from design school!



doesitmatter?
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 509,811
May 2011
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:37:36 AM
I'm sorry but there was absolutely so reason for her to say that to you except to hurt you.

This is your hobby and as long as you enjoy the process and your pages - that is what matters. {hugs}


Child of God, follower of Jesus, and so thankful for His presence in my life <><
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PennyPaws
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 551,978
April 2012
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Loc: Canada

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:41:08 AM
I agree with the Peas that mentioned how graphic design and scrapbooking are different... She's not a good judge of scrapbooking because the the point of scrapbooking is so different than graphic design... You scrap because it tells a story and expresses love, and because it makes you happy... There may be skills that are useful to both, but the 'goal' of each is so different I don't see how she could even be in a spot to judge...

What some people call 'unfinished' is what others love and call 'minimal'... 'Cluttered' is 'layered' to others... So her own style preferences are in there too... It sounds like her style isn't the same as your's, and since it's not what she likes she's describing it in very harsh, negative terms... That her style isn't your style is okay, how she expressed that to you was hurtful and lacking any kindness or tact... Maybe she has a bit of a thick skin when it comes to critiquing art/style though... I imagine graphic designers get a fair amount of negative feedback from clients/etc, so maybe she didn't realize that how she gives feedback in an office setting isn't how to give it to a friend

FWIW, my Mom's style is more on the 'childish' side but it touches my heart so much to see her make things and I love when she gives things to me... She didn't have the most child-like childhood, so to see her just get right into supplies and play and be free and happy makes everything she creates so beautiful to me

However your style came about, don't change it for anyone... Play and have fun with your supplies


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Mallie
PeaFixture

PeaNut 574,604
December 2012
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Posted: 4/30/2013 11:44:33 AM


Your friend is what I call a Joy Sucker.

Don't let this joysucker rob you of a hobby you love.

EllenPea
Pea with a Pen

PeaNut 70,644
February 2003
Posts: 19,346
Layouts: 785
Loc: Southern California

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:47:03 AM
Wow. Just wow. I would like to hope that your friend then offered some constructive suggestions as to how you might improve, but something tells me that's not the case.



norcha
Going Up

PeaNut 377,524
May 2008
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Loc: Rochester, NY

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:58:37 AM
Oh my goodness! Nothing makes me sadder than to read a "friend" made you feel embarrassed and ashamed. A true friend and those words have nothing in common.

Please don't let those hurtful words color how you see yourself and the lovely memories you are keeping for yourself and loved ones.



rndo64
Half Way There!

PeaNut 535,711
January 2012
Posts: 263
Layouts: 0
Loc: Lyndhurst, NJ

Posted: 4/30/2013 11:59:30 AM
so sorry about that....
my own mom and sister, when they see my albums, they ALWAYS have to say this to me: "you need to get a life...you have too much free time on your hands." it really irks me too.

Purple Sparkles
BucketHead

PeaNut 3,486
March 2000
Posts: 623
Layouts: 7
Loc: In My Scrap Room

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:08:40 PM
Aw geez, I'm sorry. That must have been very hurtful. I'm sorry, but her comment was really rude. Don't let her steal your joy of creating! I'm sure everyone loved your heartfelt creations. I keep every handmade card and project given to me over the years because someone cared enough about me to create it with loving hands and their valuable time.

I, too, have been hurt when giving a handcrafted project to someone, and the recipient was less than excited. But that was their problem, not mine. My intentions were good.

Please remember one of the best quotes I have ever heard: "I am not responsible for someone else's bad behavior."

Keep creating, and love every minute of it!


~~Caroline

lascrapper
PeaAddict

PeaNut 12,690
March 2001
Posts: 1,861
Layouts: 0
Loc: Minnesota

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:17:56 PM
THinking what everyone above has already posted...

And adding this: my pages are about the memories and the love I share with the people I care about most. I'm not much of an artistic scrapper myself...but that is SO not the point of my albums!



SHEREJ
100 cans of Peas on the Wall...

PeaNut 223,259
September 2005
Posts: 141
Layouts: 42

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:30:10 PM
I am so sorry that you had to listen to a "friend" criticize you. While i was reading your post, I thought of the many handmade gifts I have received from my crafty family members and how those gifts are the ones that never end up in a donation bag. I love them and they always end up on display in my home or on me. I am sure that your family feels the same way about the gifts you give them and would be very sad if you stopped sharing yourself with them in this way. I don't know if you have kids or not but can you imagine telling one of your kids that you didn't want them to make you any more cards because they sucked and that from now on, they should stick to hallmark? Or if your husband spent a whole day making you a special meal would you tell him that it sucked and that next time, he should just take you out & let the professionals handle the cooking?

Just sayin that your "friend" should probably keep her opinions to her self!

minmoon
PeaNut

PeaNut 408,073
January 2009
Posts: 147
Layouts: 0

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:37:54 PM
Ugh Lola, that really stinks. You scrap for YOU and know that others out there likely appreciate your time, effort and thought.

StaZyG
BucketHead

PeaNut 561,149
July 2012
Posts: 602
Layouts: 15

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:39:23 PM
I think a true friend would appreciate you more. We all have different styles and like different things. It's nothing to be ashamed about. A true friend would encourage you and maybe offer a few tips to take your work to the next level particularly if they are an "expert". However it just sounds like she wanted to be rude. You don't need a friend like that!
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Scrapn Nana
PEAring through my camera lens

PeaNut 272,954
August 2006
Posts: 8,491
Layouts: 26

Posted: 4/30/2013 12:43:06 PM
Your friend was not being "honest" with you, but arrogant and mean spirited. She may be a graphic artist, but that does not give her the right to ridicule your scrapbooks.

She was deliberately belittling. That's not the thing a good friend would do. Therefore, your "friend" is not a good friend. I know little about her except for this, but I suggest you reconsider this relationship. If it isn't mutually supportive and helpful, then maybe it's time to step back at least for a time.

As for your scrapbooks, it isn't how your "friend" feels about them, but if they bring you and your family pleasure. There is no right or wrong way to scrapbook. There are no scrapbook police (although your "friend" sounds like a wanna-be cop).

Don't waste your scrapping love on your "friend." Do it for you. And love it for what it is, a way of showcasing your photos.

FWIW, your friend would probably look down on my style, too. But I don't care what others think. All that matters is that my family all love my albums. They are the ones for whom I scrapbook.

Don't let her ruin your enjoyment of scrapbooking. She was not being brutally honest, but brutal and vicious. Her opinion is not fact. And if you believe her lie, then she has taken something very precious from you. Don't let her.

Hugs!


My Scrapn' Blog

Photographers are violent people. First they frame you, then they shoot you, then they hang you on the wall; but if you're real good, they will scrapbook you!
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