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jodster70
To the right, To the right
PeaNut 51,257
October 2002
Posts: 5,548
Layouts: 28
Loc: Usually NSBR, an un"pea"dictable place :)
 |  Posted: 1/10/2013 4:48:21 PM
The Math Counts v. basketball thread got me to thinking about how I view education versus the way others view their child's education.
What are your ambitions regarding your kids' educations? Just curious.
I am a former teacher, but I'm not as worried about my child's ambitions regarding college, etc. as some. My child is on the autistic spectrum (PDD), but it's too soon to know whether or not he's going to be college material or not.
Even if I knew he was college material for sure, I'm still not very ambitious when it comes to his education. I want him to be successful, but don't care if he goes to a trade school or community college. To be honest, I would prefer that he not go to an Ivy League school or private college because of the cost involved. I don't want him to incur a lot of debt to get his education. (I don't think that is an option anyway in my case, but I'm just saying.)
Don't get me wrong, I still want him to try his best in school, make good grades, and honor his commitments, but I'm not as concerned with education as some.
My ultimate goal for my son, whether he goes to college or not, is that he makes enough to live comfortably and that he's happy in whatever profession he chooses.
What are the peas' thoughts on this topic? |
**Jody**
"The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government -- lest it come to dominate our lives and interests."
Patrick Henry | |
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KittenOnTheKeys
PeaFixture
PeaNut 498,237
February 2011
Posts: 3,049
Layouts: 0
Loc: SW
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 4:56:38 PM
Education is important to me. That is why we homeschool. Our schools are usually somewhere in the 48-50 range. I make sure my autistic boys learn and not just get labeled and stuck to vegetate. He was just tested and outperformed most ps "normal" kids. |
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Aggiemom92
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 90,200
June 2003
Posts: 2,678
Layouts: 2
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 4:59:22 PM
My ultimate goal for my son, whether he goes to college or not, is that he makes enough to live comfortably
I know it's possible, but I think the opportunities to 'live comfortably' without any post-secondary education are diminishing. However, I don't think college is the only or even best option for everyone. We really need to increase and improve the 'other than college' opportunities for kids (trade schools, for example). |
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Seanna.
PeaFixture
PeaNut 142,904
April 2004
Posts: 3,478
Layouts: 20
Loc: TN
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:00:22 PM
It was a pretty big deal. I also don't think college is for everybody and that that is a GOOD thing. However, for my children, college was/is the vehicle to get them where they want to go, so we made decisions based on that. |
| When I went to edit my signature, the "Edit Signature" title was spelled wrong. So that was distracting and I forgot what I wanted my new signature to be. | |
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WannaPea
No Peas for you ! Come back one year!
PeaNut 151,172
June 2004
Posts: 26,828
Layouts: 175
Loc: In my PJ's
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gar
Whoopea!
PeaNut 172,235
October 2004
Posts: 12,438
Layouts: 0
Loc: England UK
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:02:29 PM
It's important but it's certainly not everything. I would far rather have an educated, well rounded child with social skills, hobbies, a wide range of interests etc than a kid who missed out on all the other things that make a successful life because of a super intensive education.
It's only part of the whole picture, in other words 
ETA - before someone else says it, one doesn't have to be at the expense of the others but it was a way of summarising my thoughts.
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"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
Stephen Roberts
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tamhugh
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 12,875
March 2001
Posts: 7,882
Layouts: 11
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:03:48 PM
I have to admit that I was pretty ambitious for them. From the time they were little, we discussed it in terms of when they went to college, not if they went. We did, however, always say that they just needed to do SOMETHING to continue education, whether that was college, trade school, military, etc. Deep down, I always hoped that would be college.
We have a good community college in our area, but DH and I always hoped that the boys would start out at a 4 year school. It was based purely on our own experiences. I was extremely sheltered as a teenager and DH was very immature. Going away to school benefitted us in ways that staying at home would never have done. I know that is not true for everyone, but it was so big for us that we couldn't imagine it not also being a benefit to our children. DH#1 was a fairly high achieving student and most of his friends were as well. 3 of them started on the community college route, and now almost 5 years later, none of them have a degree, although one will graduate in May. The other two have dropped out. All of his friends who went the 4 year route have graduated or are about to. OTOH, younger DS had no friends who chose community college. Two of his more goal oriented friends, both who chose pretty good schools, have dropped out this semester. So, it can absolutely go either way.
In the end, you just have to do what you think is best for your family. You know your situation and your child best. | |
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valincal
Comfortably numb.
PeaNut 227,939
October 2005
Posts: 13,599
Layouts: 5
Loc: Southern Alberta
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:06:34 PM
Education is very important to us. We set certain expectations of our kids at an early age and they've always (well, almost always!) stepped up to the challenge. Granted, neither of our boys have learning disabilities or other serious obstacles that stood in the way of their educational progress. My heart goes out to kids who struggle with school and to their parents as well.
I consider our family very lucky and I'm super proud of what my guys have achieved so far. 
We really need to increase and improve the 'other than college' opportunities for kids (trade schools, for example).
eta I very much agree with this.
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julieberg
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 160,179
July 2004
Posts: 6,441
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:07:42 PM
We are pretty insistent that our kids get a college education. My oldest ds wanted to be a firefighter. We told him that was fine, but he had to get a BS first. You need a BS to go up the ranks in the dept. anyways. He went to school for finance and is now working at a bank. He has friends who went the firefighter route and don't have jobs. Is he thrilled with his job? Not really, but when I asked him about being a firefighter, he said he is glad we pushed him to go to college.
Oldest DD has a BS in Public Relations and a minor in business. She is on her own and living paycheck to paycheck. She would be happier if she opened a boutique, which is her aspiration.  Kills me. She originally was going for interior design and freaked out that she wouldn't get a job in that field, so she switched majors. She regrets that.
Youngest DS was ready and geared for college. He is an engineering major.
My dh has a BS and a MBA, which I think helped the kids. That or they just wanted to get away from us. 
My brothers all have worked "blue collar" jobs their entire lives. I see the toll it has taken on their bodies and it isn't easy.
Bottom line is that most people will make more money and be more comfortable (financially and physically) with an education. Every cent we spent is money we don't regret spending. | |
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caroscraps
babies, babies, babies..................
PeaNut 20,301
August 2001
Posts: 11,669
Layouts: 0
Loc: The PEAch State
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:17:05 PM
All 3 of our children got Master's degrees, but one got his in an unconventional way. He had to learn how hard it was to make a living without a degree of any kind first. And he saw his siblings make better decisions. |
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h&hmommy
PeaAddict
PeaNut 337,614
September 2007
Posts: 1,286
Layouts: 0
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:21:01 PM
Education is VERY important in our home. The expectation is both kids will go to a four year college and hopefully come out very employable. Our DS (who is on the autism spectrum too) shows a strong aptitude in math and science and that bodes well for a good job.
I am a SAHM (former teacher) and I am staying right on top of their school work. To be honest, I would be disappointed if my kids decided to go to a trade school rather than the university. | |
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PunchPrincess
PeaNut 17,063
June 2001
Posts: 12,660
Layouts: 0
Loc: where 71 and 70 meet
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:21:20 PM
tamhugh, did you mean DS#1 when you said DH#1? |
<*********************************************************************>
PunchPrincess ( def. A long, long time ago when I first started scrapping I discovered punches -- round, square, squiggles, cars, etc. You name it. Like coat hangers they multiplied, under the bed I think until they were threatening to take over that precious space that we all covet and refuse to cede to other family members. Thus I became PunchPrincess. )
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CADoodlebug
Happy Happy Joy Joy Happy Happy Joy
PeaNut 178,445
November 2004
Posts: 17,064
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern California
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:25:32 PM
Interestingly, when my sister and I were younger
it was just assumed we would go to college after
high school. Neither of our parents went to college.
Although my dad did get his degree after retiring
with 30 years in the Navy.
Even though DS had comprehension difficulties,
there was no question he would go to college.
He got an AA degree then a degree in Accounting/
Finance and Business Management. Didn't go Ivy
League or the private college route but has a great
job as an accountant with hopes of getting his
CPA.
I think our trade schools are severely lacking
and if DS was at all gifted with his hands or
that kind of mind, it would have been okay.
Our plumber who charges $135 an hour or our
heating and air conditioning guy are making
the big bucks. |
Joy
"I just wish my mouth had a backspace key!"
  
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Basket1lady
PeaAddict
PeaNut 465,906
April 2010
Posts: 1,902
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern Virginia
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:27:17 PM
We have a 13 yo and a 15 yo. Education is a huge priority for us. We are military and when we move, I choose the school and then the house. We talk about WHEN they go to college, not IF.
DS is an Aspie, but is also very academically gifted. We fully expect him to go to college. He excels at math and science and should fit in with a career in either. DD is gifted as well, but her talents lie in the arts. We talk a lot about majors and jobs associated with them. We expect them to go to college, but we also expect them to be realistic in their job goals. We talk about how your job determines your standard of living. I would be fine if either went a trade route; I think those fields need smart people, too. Basically they need to choose a field where they would be happy and where they can remain employed.
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busypea
boring + nerdy
PeaNut 52,817
October 2002
Posts: 25,146
Layouts: 145
Loc: Oregon
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:27:23 PM
Education is very important to us, but we don't have specific aspirations for his post-high school education.
I think it's most likely that he will go to a traditional college, but if he chooses a different path, we're OK with that too, as long as his choice is well-reasoned.
We would definitely be the most comfortable with going to a 4 year school, because that's the route we both chose and it served us well. We recognize that some other kind of education might be what turns out to be best for him, though. | |
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theshyone
I'm Alive!
PeaNut 266,636
June 2006
Posts: 10,127
Layouts: 37
Loc: Alberta
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 5:29:40 PM
Education is not the end all be all of life.
Whether it be university; trade school; a profession or a stay at home woman or man; doesn't matter to us.
Living their lives; is what is important.
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My Blog
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world. Jack Layton
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Carey Ayn
why
PeaNut 41,258
June 2002
Posts: 17,551
Layouts: 321
Loc: Minnesota
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:29:51 PM
Very important but not at the expense of their happiness. |
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UkSue
AncestralPea
PeaNut 428,374
June 2009
Posts: 4,228
Layouts: 2
Loc: Greater London
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:32:09 PM
It's important but it's certainly not everything. I would far rather have an educated, well rounded child with social skills, hobbies, a wide range of interests etc than a kid who missed out on all the other things that make a successful life because of a super intensive education.
Gar summed it up perfectly for me.
My oldest (daughter) is a high flyer, who is probably no more bright than her younger brother, but works extremely hard. She has just finished a double degree in English and Spanish law and is now bilingual as she took extra classes and exams whilst at Uni in Spain .
My oldest son is very bright but downright lazy. I get very frustrated- he is always happy just to 'pass', has no idea what he wants to do with his life and has no real ambition.i have learnt that trying to force him to do work over and above the basics is like trying to push treacle up the wall!
My youngest (11)is on the Autism spectrum but is showing some serious skills in Computing and Maths. He has actually been helping his older brother with his 'A' level Computing homework (writing programmes). I have no idea what his future will be and am pretty anxious at the moment- we are waiting to hear whether he has got into the only local school that caters particularly for those on the Spectrum. They are over-subscribed, and we have been told,ironically, that as we have worked so hard with him on his social skills he may not get in as others may be seen as more needy  |
| Love is short, forgetting is long, and understanding longer still. | |
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freecharlie
Is the pool open yet?
PeaNut 109,127
September 2003
Posts: 19,232
Layouts: 4
Loc: Colorado
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:32:13 PM
Academics come first. If you slack off in school, you'll be grounded and won't be going to practice.
That said, school isn't the only thing in life. Sports, a healthy social life. And independant skills are important. |
| Tribbey: I believe, as long as Justice Dreifort is intolerant toward gays, lesbians, blacks, unions, women, poor people, and the first, fourth, fifth, and ninth amendments, I will remain intolerant toward him! [to Ainsley] Nice meeting you | |
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SDeven
Love Letters Pea
PeaNut 65,852
January 2003
Posts: 28,193
Layouts: 380
Loc: Nashville, TN!
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:32:16 PM
I have one child who is neuro-typical and one with Autism. What I expect for each of them is to be a person of faith, an honorable man, and as well-educated as is appropriate for each, in that order. One will go to college. The other will be happy to finally pass the GED.
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anmolhai
AncestralPea
PeaNut 40,642
June 2002
Posts: 4,364
Layouts: 71
Loc: Canada
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:36:09 PM
Education is very Important to us. In our house we always talk about when kids will go to University and never IF they go to university.We have been saving money for them. I know both kids will have Master's degree for sure. |
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*Delphinium Twinkle*
I'm just a pea:)
PeaNut 163,613
August 2004
Posts: 67,986
Layouts: 236
Loc: *Sunny Southern California*
| Posted: 1/10/2013 5:46:14 PM
It's very important in our home. although so is being well rounded.
Academics come first but cross country, drama, choir, scouting and community service are all very important too.
When given a choice my DS always chooses academics first.
He too, is on the autism spectrum but he's the top of his class so I have no doubt he'll be going to a university.
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sunny 5
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 472,024
June 2010
Posts: 2,062
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 1/10/2013 6:00:05 PM
education is very important..but good values come first. our daughter who has aspergers--is in her 5th yr of struggling through college. in the US, you don't have to pass classes just in your major...you have to take a "well rounded" program. so she has to attempt her required english class for the 4th time this yr. she is highly gifted...but can only take 2 classes at a time...
her sister struggles with depression...has only 4 quarters left...but is taking a break from school..
it is tough now
days.. | |
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pahina722
Peasfully Grading
PeaNut 167,524
September 2004
Posts: 5,949
Layouts: 1
Loc: Northwest Florida
| Posted: 1/10/2013 6:03:56 PM
Since DH and I both teach,obviously education is important to us. However, we've also seen far too many kids in our college classes who have no business in college and who would be better served in vo-tech classes. As a PP stated, our plumber and air conditioning guys make far more than I do with my master's degree.
DS knows that he is expected to get post-secondary education or training because jobs that require neither are rare. WHAT exactly he will get is up to him. He has the academic talent to do well in college . . . But at 15 he isn't sure what he really wants to pursue. |
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PEArfect
AncestralPea
PeaNut 452,048
January 2010
Posts: 4,464
Layouts: 0
Loc: Indiana
| Posted: 1/10/2013 6:22:09 PM
It's important, but it's not everything. I'm here to teach them, guide them, and support them in whatever they choose to do with their lives.
A college degree does not guarantee you a career. I know several college graduates that are working jobs that do not require a college degree. I also know a multi millionaire with an 8th grade education. |
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SillyRabbit
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 104,457
September 2003
Posts: 2,814
Layouts: 12
Loc: Where The Grass Is Blue
| Posted: 1/10/2013 6:51:05 PM
My philosophy is the same as yours. Neither of my children are college bound. My older DS will probably go to trade school. Younger DS is on the spectrum and will probably work in a sheltered workshop. I have an advanced degree and a CPA license but none of that is where I find value in myself. DH didn't go to college and is much happier in his career (and making much more money) than I am. I just want my boys to have happy lives doing something they can be proud of. |
Cindy 
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myboysnme
one of those "entitled" peas
PeaNut 69,081
February 2003
Posts: 6,730
Layouts: 1
| Posted: 1/10/2013 6:56:27 PM
My husband and i both have Master's Degrees and he is a teacher. Years ago an English teacher told me,in regard to my son, "Not everyone is cut out for college." I told her my son absolutely was going to college.
Well he has tried college and it is not for him. He still takes one or two classes at a time because every field he is interested in prefer college. I have spent almost all of his college fund on classes he dropped after the drop period, or he just stopped going.
So the question - how important is education to for your child? It is very important, except it isn't my call. All I can do is teach the importance of education, support his efforts to get an education, and let it go. |
My choice is to not take it personally - people have opinions. Particularly people here.-Peabay 12/29/11
I know this is assuming, but I'm really starting to think you are one of those "entitled" peas - Dalayney 4/2/12
profile pic courtesy of GreenEyedLady Designs at Scrap ARt Studio.
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moveablefeast
do justice, love mercy
PeaNut 265,707
June 2006
Posts: 11,106
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern Virginia
| Posted: 1/10/2013 7:09:03 PM
My daughter's ballet school has a fine philosophy on life: Talent is overrated. Hard work is more important.
I agree with them. I have an intelligent child. She is ahead of some of her peers in an academic sense - she has academic talent, and that is easy to see in her. But her talent will only take her so far. I want her to work hard and be the best *her* she can be. I want her to work hard. If that means she is an honors student and goes to an Ivy (or a Little Ivy, like her mama) then that is great. If that means she is an average student and goes to community college then that is fine too. If she is a musician like me, great - if she is an athlete like her dad, great - if she is something else entirely, fabulous! What I want is for her to work hard at what she does. I want her to do things she loves and have a good time too. But I want her to work hard.
The rest is details. I don't define success in school by what college you go to - one of my two degrees is from a little known state school with no real reputation for much except being a decent party school (although it has in recent years been listed as a "best value" among schools of its type - the money is why I went there), and I will tell you that I was more successful as a student at the nowheresville state school than I was at one of the most highly ranked private colleges in the country, because I worked harder. I had to define myself at that school because nobody did it for me that time around - at my Little Ivy I think we were defined when we walked in the door, in some ways.
So that is what I want for her. To work to her potential, to work hard, to define herself and be a fabulous her. My categories are going to end up being so meaningless to her, and that is appropriate. | |
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**Colleen**
AncestralPea
PeaNut 26,667
January 2002
Posts: 4,446
Layouts: 87
Loc: The Southland
| Posted: 1/10/2013 7:23:36 PM
We are helping pay for ds's law school education right now -- that pretty much says it all. We value education very highly. We never made college optional, it was always assumed he would go -- but he was always a good (if occasionally underachieving!) student.
If he hadn't been, we might have explored other options. I do think that most people (even those who choose careers that don't require it) would benefit from a college education though.
One thing I think we did right by ds is that we talked about college even in elementary school -- that he might have to work on some boring some stuff but then when you go to college you can study whatever you want. |
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batya
Making the WWW better, one post at a time.
PeaNut 59,094
December 2002
Posts: 31,790
Layouts: 24
Loc: up on my high horse
| Posted: 1/10/2013 7:35:59 PM
Aside from good physical, spiritual and mental health? It is of primary importance. Education is everything. I was raised that way, I am raising my children that way. But that doesn't mean that they can't be happy or choose their own paths. I don't see one thing having to do with the other. It also doesn't mean they should be stressed or have no time to breathe. |
OK. Newbie. This is how it works. If your post consists of 80% sanity, 10% stupidity and 10% all kinds of crazy, we immediately focus on the 20% b/c it discredits the 80%.
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journey fan
"Rome! By all means, Rome."
PeaNut 308,186
April 2007
Posts: 11,519
Layouts: 0
Loc: California Coast
| Posted: 1/10/2013 7:39:26 PM
Our education philosophy as communicated to our kids:
- You will do well in school because it's your job, not for any reward except the satisfaction of doing well (B average or better; everyone has their bad subject)
- College is a privilege, not a right, and we're not paying if you're not committed (i.e., we are not paying so you can party)
- We're setting aside money and will help you get loans or scholarships but you will pay back loans, not us.
- We can afford a State college. If you choose anything more expensive, you pay the difference. If you choose to not live at home, get a job and pay your own way.
- We are happy to use college funds for trade school, police or fire academy, culinary school, military, etc. (we don't feel that college is the ONLY way to a great job you love)
- If you don't pursue anything after high school, we'll hold your college fund until you get married, buy a home, etc.
So education is important to me but not for the reasons I think it is to most parents today. I don't expect them to "achieve". I want them to be happy and be able to support themselves (and pay us back if need be, lol).
It took me 13 years working FT/college PT to get my degree. It was a personal goal, it ended up helping me promote in a great career I had already built without college, and I learned that the world is wider than my own experience.
That's all I hope for my kids. How they get there is up to them
PS: I know parents of 4th graders who have them in activities the child hates because "it will look good on your college applications." That is SO not us! |
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jodster70
To the right, To the right
PeaNut 51,257
October 2002
Posts: 5,548
Layouts: 28
Loc: Usually NSBR, an un"pea"dictable place :)
| Posted: 1/10/2013 7:57:31 PM
Thanks for replying everyone. The replies are very interesting so far. I was thinking about it as I read the other thread and wanted to see what everyone else thought. |
**Jody**
"The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government -- lest it come to dominate our lives and interests."
Patrick Henry | |
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Epeanymous
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 15,108
May 2001
Posts: 2,151
Layouts: 1
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:04:42 PM
We are both academics. We value education highly. My oldest two kids so far seem to both love school and have ideas about their life that would involve college and postgraduate education, but they are still young.
Just FYI, Ivy League and similar schools, depending on your means, are often cheaper than going to public colleges. They offer amazing financial aid packages. | |
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IleneTell
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 434,842
August 2009
Posts: 2,427
Layouts: 635
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:07:24 PM
College is the minimum. I expect more beyond that. |
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jodster70
To the right, To the right
PeaNut 51,257
October 2002
Posts: 5,548
Layouts: 28
Loc: Usually NSBR, an un"pea"dictable place :)
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:12:33 PM
PS...
My parents weren't educated, and didn't care about what I did after high school. I always knew I wanted to go to college, but my mistake was not researching my chosen career (teaching) before I went into it.
I taught ten years, and it always stressed me out, though I liked working with kids.
If my son does go to college, I am going to stress that he needs to research his chosen career and make sure that's what he wants to do for the rest of his life. |
**Jody**
"The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government -- lest it come to dominate our lives and interests."
Patrick Henry | |
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writermom1
Thrift Whisperer
PeaNut 114,407
November 2003
Posts: 22,289
Layouts: 66
Loc: At the intersection of Hooterville and Stars Hollow
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:20:53 PM
My ultimate goal for my son, whether he goes to college or not, is that he makes enough to live comfortably and that he's happy in whatever profession he chooses.
This.
I also agree with Journeyfan. |
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Simply_Lovely
PeaFixture
PeaNut 463,295
April 2010
Posts: 3,280
Layouts: 3
Loc: New York City
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:31:12 PM
Aside from good physical, spiritual and mental health? It is of primary importance. Education is everything. I was raised that way, I am raising my children that way. But that doesn't mean that they can't be happy or choose their own paths. I don't see one thing having to do with the other. It also doesn't mean they should be stressed or have no time to breathe.
ITA! 100% Education is of the utmost importance in my family. Of course if my future child shows propensity for arts or athletics I will encourage that. But not at the expense of education. They would need something to fall back on just in case. |
 
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IScrapCrap
PeaAddict
PeaNut 570,639
October 2012
Posts: 1,025
Layouts: 0
Loc: pea formerly known as GIPfunny
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:46:38 PM
It depends on the child. I hope my oldest graduates from college. I hope my middle child can hold a full time job and live independently. I hope my youngest child will learn how to talk or sign, be toilet trained, and possibly be able to work with other adults once he is 22. | |
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Peabay
Happy now?
PeaNut 156,993
July 2004
Posts: 44,631
Layouts: 13
Loc: Connecticut
| Posted: 1/10/2013 8:49:38 PM
It is the be all and end all for us. Not attending college is not an option in our house. Now, the college can be a trade school should that be what my child desires, but continuing their education post high school is a must. It's not optional. |
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ramblin72
Half Way There!
PeaNut 85,321
May 2003
Posts: 250
Layouts: 73
| Posted: 1/10/2013 9:02:01 PM
my parents were not well educated (not dumb either)
they also were not the greatest parents
getting an education freed me from that in a lot of ways and not just in book smarts
the key to education for me is the freedom it can give you | |
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pynk E
PeaNut 48,314
September 2002
Posts: 13,258
Layouts: 295
| Posted: 1/10/2013 9:02:09 PM
A neurodevelopmental specialist once told me that having a degree is just a piece of paper if you do not have the social skills to hold down a job. Education is important. Working well with others, being a team player, is equally important. Education is important to us, being the best in the class isn't. Childhood is too short to be stressed by being the best.
With my autistic guys we mainstreamed through elementary and then moved them into an autism specific program with an emphasis on life skills. This year they are doing work experience.
With my 15y, we encouraged him to be the best he could be. Now in grade 10 he has total control on what he wants to take. He is in IB but isn't always enjoying it so he dropped one IB class in the second semester and went with a regular class. He's still trying to figure life out let alone know which direction to go with his education.
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Scrapalotomous
2 Headed Tasmanian Pea
PeaNut 106,860
September 2003
Posts: 6,060
Layouts: 24
Loc: The Apple Isle
| Posted: 1/10/2013 9:06:14 PM
Interesting question and replies.
I think a lot of it stems from what you believe education is and what it is for.
Me - I believe education is vitally important in developing well rounded people who are able to contribute fully to society.
What level academic success or attainment, as seems to be the thoughts of many responders here, will be a combination of their own interests, motivations and opportunities that come their way. DH and I will support, encourage and guide them through this in any way possible. |
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pennyring
Thrift Ninja
PeaNut 226,011
October 2005
Posts: 22,406
Layouts: 40
Loc: Rite Aid
| Posted: 1/10/2013 9:17:40 PM
I view college as not necessary, but a step up in the world. I believe a truly bright, vibrant soul will find their way, with or without college.
That said, DH and I would 100% encourage our children to pursue a college education. Neither his parents, nor mine, took any interest in our college educations. Like none at all. Zero.
I'm sure it's because we are both bright and they knew we would find our way in the world, and they were all apparently too self-absorbed to realize their children needed some direction.
What I'm saying is, we're both successful, but I feel like I would have been that much farther ahead if someone had bothered to help me a little. We plan to help our kids with that kind of thing, and we're already helping our nieces (age 8 and 15) to start thinking about their futures.
We're Adam Carolla fans and the way he puts it to his kid is like, "Do you want to drive the crappy car, or the nice car like Mommy? The nice car? Ok, this is what you have to do to get the nice car and the big house."
Nobody really lays that our for you. It's just common sense, but nobody talks about it. At least not in our homes when we were kids.
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mebarnet
I am not the Pea you are looking for
PeaNut 434,276
August 2009
Posts: 7,484
Layouts: 8
Loc: Tarpon Springs, Florida
| Posted: 1/10/2013 9:24:39 PM
Education is very important to me for my children. My youngest went to did schools for the first few years and now she has been in private school since I transitioned back to the civilian world. She is in 8 th grade right now so I moved to get into a good school district. The high school is a " university high school" and they have a medical program magnet the which we applied for. Even if she doesn't get in the first year, we are in the district now so she will have a better chance of getting in the following year.
I don't push her to do any specific thing, but I do want her to do good in school and make the most of the time she has. She is college material and wants to go, she is just not sure what she wants to do yet.
I had my oldest daughter quite young and carry the guilt because I don't feel that I did enough for her in her younger years. She did go to odd school for middle school and she ended up graduating high school almost two year early but then she did nothing with her life. Se is 23 now and has a 15 month old son. After her son was born, she realized she needed to make life better for him and enrolled in college. She just started her third semester. I honestly never thought she would go to college and she is struggling with it a bit but she is going and I'm so proud of her.
I think education is important but it doesn't matter to me if my kids go to an Ivy League or a trade school just so long as they are happy with what they are doing and not wasting their lives. |
Mari - Loving Scrapbook Generation kits and sketches!!!
2013
2012
12x12 double LO - 267 / 7 cards
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12x12 207 doubles / 8x8 39 doubles / 3 6x6 Holiday Daily / 20 cards | |
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TeachOne
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 2,387
January 2000
Posts: 2,966
Layouts: 12
Loc: USA
 | Posted: 1/10/2013 11:24:19 PM
Growing up college was expected for both dh and myself. We both have advanced degrees. I have several degrees to be exact. I fully expect all of my kids to attend a 4 year institution. I would love for them to get a post secondary degree as well. I have always believed that material things can be taken away but no one can take away your knowledge- so I encourage them to explore the world and learn as much as they can.
They are bright and have done well in school. In fact, they all received straight A's this semester. Some of them have to work harder than other, but dh and I sacrifice a lot to over see homework and other academic endeavors. In fact, we all spend most evenings studying and forgo a lot of tv during the week in order pursue work and academic endeavors. The kids are also involved in competitive sports and other clubs. We do discourage them from working during the school year because they already have a job- it's to do well in school.
I wouldn't freak out if one if my kids didn't go to college but I would be highly disappointed. I would definitely require them to attend a trade school though. | |
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BoSoxBeth
Working for SHALOM
PeaNut 44,871
August 2002
Posts: 17,096
Layouts: 8
| Posted: 1/10/2013 11:47:10 PM
Education is absolutely critical to me. | |
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tamhugh
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 12,875
March 2001
Posts: 7,882
Layouts: 11
| Posted: 1/10/2013 11:58:38 PM
tamhugh, did you mean DS#1 when you said DH#1?
Yes, LOL! I have two sons, but only one husband.  Maybe I should have taken some typing classes in college, because my fingers do not work as fast as my thoughts. | |
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_Kristi_
PeaAddict
PeaNut 307,675
April 2007
Posts: 1,044
Layouts: 5
Loc: California
| Posted: 1/11/2013 12:39:23 AM
It is very important!
I expect my kids to go to a 4 year college. I don't really care if they start at a Community College or Harvard. I just want them to have the experience and I think having a degree will benefit them for years to come.
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MandKsMom
BucketHead
PeaNut 336,381
September 2007
Posts: 555
Layouts: 0
Loc: North Las Vegas, NV
| Posted: 1/11/2013 2:52:38 AM
Education is very important in our family. A big reason why we decided to homeschool, we are military and have been stationed in Nevada (which we love) but the schools - all of them - are horrible. Decision to homeschool using a online curriculum has been our best choice for our children. We do expect them to go to college, both are very intelligent and are pretty career oriented at this point, 8th grade and 6th grade with professional aspirations in their futures.
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peasful1
Needs a New Pea Title
PeaNut 44,870
August 2002
Posts: 14,164
Layouts: 1
Loc: Valley of the Sun
| Posted: 1/11/2013 4:02:08 AM
Life is about balance. Many things are important and worthy of time, energy and expense. My kids are missing school right now so that they may travel halfway around the world to visit family. I'm ok with that. Youngest has missed class field trips (optional) to play big soccer tournaments. I think it's important to not be single-faceted in life. School is their primary focus but it's a long haul. Kindergarten to post-secondary or graduate school leaves plenty of space to shift ones attention every now and then. |
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"When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself." -- Wayne Dyer
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