S/o female intuition... Share a story of when you ignored your intuition....

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Posted 1/26/2013 by TankTop in NSBR Board
 

TankTop
I teach, therefore I am a teacher

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Posted: 1/26/2013 2:47:41 PM
The other thread has great stories of people listening to that inner voice.

Now, lets share some stories of when we didn't listen.


"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome." Hope Floats


jarmommy
AncestralPea

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Posted: 1/26/2013 2:55:37 PM
When I married my XH. I can have a very nervous stomach and that morning I was on the toilet right up until we left and it continued all day. I sat outside the courthouse many a time trying to convince myself to get an annulment. I wish I would've listened to myself. It was a MISERABLE marriage and everyday for 6 years I kicked myself for doing it. The day I finally told him to leave and never come back was the best day in over 6 years.

KittenOnTheKeys
PeaFixture

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Posted: 1/26/2013 2:56:06 PM
I didn't ignore it, but my leader did.

During my college years, I was in a volunteer position with someone. A couple of us got this "gut feeling" and ended up going to the "leader" about this guy. The leader blew us off, so we decided to quit that volunteer position, so we could get far from this guy.

We later learn that this guy we had the "feeling" about was molesting children, young children, at this place. Leader feels like a heel for ignoring us and not doing anything to check in on him.



flanz
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 1/26/2013 2:56:56 PM
I'll play. (I posted the other intuition thread).

DD was very ill at age 13. She had a migraine that she was hospitalized with on DAY 17!!!! (We had been to pediatrician, neurologist specializing in kids, two trips to ER - nothing helped!!!) It was a truly horrible situation, and the day DD was admitted to hospital she had a simultaneous treatment with my acupuncturist and a cranio-sacral therapist. My gut told me that THIS was the path to healing for her, I felt it strongly. DH and our pediatrician were strongly insisting that time for hospitalization had arrived. It didn't feel right to me, and it turned out to be awful for DD. She had four days of intensive treatment for migraine - ice packs on her head, all day infusions of intravenous drugs for migraine (to shrink swollen blood vessels) and when we left the hospital, the A$$hole of a neurologist looked at her and me and said, "You don't have a brain tumor or meningitis, you have a horrible headache and I don't know what else to try. you have to go home and wait for it to get better!" I could have wrung his bloody neck!

We got a fabulous new neurologist for her the next day and he was amazing. He realized that Dd had a severe tension headache and that all of the opposite things that she needed had been done to her in hospital!
He had me call him mid-morning every day to tell him how her 24 hours had gone and we often spoke for 20-25 minutes. He acted like he didn't have any other patients. between him and the cranio-sacral therapist that I mentioned previously, it took her two years to heal from the trauma of what happened to her. Sadly, that very week DS andDD were rear-ended at a red light on their way to school and her neck was reinjured - two more difficult, but not as horrible, years for her!

Happy ending - she is now 22 yo, a healthy, independent college grad living a very happy life with her sweetheart of a boyfriend.

TankTop
I teach, therefore I am a teacher

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Posted: 1/26/2013 3:30:23 PM
The day I married my high school boyfriend I knew it was wrong. I just knew it. Nobody would listen to me. I was young and they told me it was nerves.

I knew it wasn't nerves.

I left him 4 years later after a very abusive marriage. I wish I would have listened to myself.


"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome." Hope Floats


PerfectCircles
In a world of spheres

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Posted: 1/26/2013 4:55:29 PM
I knew my exh was on the route to becoming an alcoholic before I married him. I convinced myself that I loved him enough to get through it with him if it happened. In the back of my mind I knew we'd divorce someday but I tried to convince myself otherwise. I had poor relationship role models. I stayed for 2 years as he became an active alcoholic and started his slow downward spiral, and for 2 more after he went to rehab and became a dry drunk. It wasn't until I realized if I stayed we would eventually have children and I'd have to share custody with him that I left.

He was well known in the community for his work with troubled youth. He attended a leadership program. He started drinking again when I left. He lost his job and hasn't had one since. He's been in jail twice for DUI and once for a physical fight he had with his live in girlfriend.

I wish I hadn't ignored my instincts when I married him but I'm glad I listened when I left.

zombie*grrl
WHO PUT A DICK IN THIS BOX?

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Posted: 1/26/2013 4:59:10 PM
I have two children. So I guess I ignored myself twice.

My favorite T-shirt says "It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" across it. My life's motto.

IScrapCrap
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/26/2013 5:01:29 PM
I haven't had good outcomes when I was certain I WAS listening to my intuition, gut, or whatever. I'm convinced I don't have that ability.

hallows
PeaNut

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Posted: 1/26/2013 5:15:15 PM
Warning: this story might be too graphic and too sensitive for some.

I found out I was pregnant with my first but felt like something was wrong. I thought it was hormones. We were trying to keep it a secret until we had an ultrasound photo to show. Every time we went to buy a onesie for our parents or a frame for the ultrasound, I refused to buy one. I just couldn't.

One morning I woke up in a panic. I looked at my DH and said "I don't feel pregnant. Somethings wrong. I need to tell my parents". My DH thought I was crazy but said "fine, tell them." I told my parents in tears. Petrified because I felt something was wrong. Everyone kept telling me it was just hormones.

Long story short there - the morning I woke up in a panic, was the morning the baby stopped growing.

Fast forward to medical intervention - I was given medication to pass the pregnancy at home. I took it and I felt afterwards like I hadn't passed enough/the medication didn't fully work. The Pregnancy Centre told me I was fine, my family told me I was fine etc.

About two weeks later, I began bleeding much more heavily. I saw my family doctor and told her "I think I'm bleeding too much. I think something is wrong". She told me "It's fine. You're fine" (without checking me out physically), my husband said I was fine, my family said I was fine, the pregnancy centre told me I was fine but my gut kept telling me something wasn't fine.

6 hours later I began haemorrhaging and was rushed to the hospital. While waiting for surgery, I "passed everything" but STILL felt like something was wrong. They sent me home anyways. I got home, screaming in pain - I was having contractions every minute or so. Again, everyone told me I was fine. The next morning, my husband found me in the bathroom and rushed me back to the hospital again. I ended up having emergency surgery - after 3 long weeks of me telling anyone who would listen to me that something was wrong.

Sorry that was so long but there were SO many times that I felt something was wrong and nobody listened. I should have spoken up for myself.

*~*amanda*~*
...

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Posted: 1/26/2013 6:44:11 PM
Im another who has to say when I married my xdh.

I wanted to break up with him about a month into dating him and he talked me into staying. We ended up getting married.

Bad, bad idea.



ScrapWench*
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Posted: 1/26/2013 7:23:06 PM

I have two children. So I guess I ignored myself twice.

My favorite T-shirt says "It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" across it. My life's motto.





We had a senior kegger at a crappy motel (it was 1983, we did a lot of shit kids would have a difficult time doing!). At the party was several guys from Butte, one of them was a cousin of a classmate. My best friend at the time was reeeeally drunk, and I was concerned about her and expressed my concerns, telling her to be careful. Just a bad vibe I guess. I left at about midnight? and went home. A couple of hours later, I woke up from a bad dream involving my friend. I just couldn't shake that feeling of doom I had. I started calling her house as soon as I got up and every hour or so for most of the day, but she never answered. I was *frantic* with worry by the time she called.

I asked her how she was and told her I had been worried about her. She said, "you know those guys from the party last night? We went to get more beer and they drove me out of town and gang-raped me."

I'd just had a feeling at the party from the way they were acting and my friend was drunk. They got off with slaps on the wrist, because she "was drunk", like a 16 year old virgin was asking to be beat up and gang-raped. It was unbelievable. She never really recovered from it emotionally. I was there for her as a friend for several years after, but "we broke up" because she said I was a toxic person. I still think of her frequently and with great fondness. We had a blast together in high school and college (which she dropped out of). I miss her.


----Theresa

zombie*grrl
WHO PUT A DICK IN THIS BOX?

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Posted: 1/26/2013 8:51:42 PM
Oh my god, it was a JOKE

I actually love my children.

I hope that is clarified to your satisfaction.

Mystie
Dancing to the end of love.

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Posted: 1/26/2013 9:05:52 PM

I haven't had good outcomes when I was certain I WAS listening to my intuition, gut, or whatever. I'm convinced I don't have that ability.


I was thinking the same thing. As a person with anxiety issues, if I listened to myself every time I had a bad feeling, I'd spend my life curled up in a ball on the floor of my closet.


Janelle



Mallie
PeaFixture

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Posted: 1/26/2013 9:30:51 PM
I let myself be persuaded that this person was good and decent and moral although my intuition was telling me otherwise. I let myself be persuaded because EVERYONE was telling me so. I thought that my gut must be wrong because EVERYONE was telling me so. Wrong, wrong, wrong. I was the only one who saw through him and worst of all, he sensed it and let's just say, it did not end well for me. He ended up smelling like a rose because he was a sociopath who was a master at covering his tracks. Sometimes there is no karma.

*Delphinium Twinkle*
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Posted: 1/26/2013 10:32:46 PM
When I was a sophomore in high school I walked home everyday.
A guy in an old blue car started following me home.
He would drive by. Turn around and drive by again. All the way to the street I turned into our neighborhood

This went on for about 4 or 5 months. It really bothered me because I knew he was following me but since he never drove into my neighborhood I didn't say anything.

One day I came home from school early. My freshman sister comes home and says that some guy followed her home. So I say was he on a blue car? She answers yes. Then I ask if he drove past then turned around and drive past again, over and over.
Once again she says yes.

My mom is freaking out then. She asks me how I know. So I say, we'll he's been following me for at least 4 months.

She calls the police. They come, take a report (I had memorized the license plate ) and then lecture me on why its important to tell right away.

So the police stake me out the next day after school.

They see the guy following me. They end up in a chase through town. He got away.

The next day not only did the regular police stake me out but so did the state police.
Once again a chase ensued.
The regular police lost him but the state police cornered him inside a grocery store in the next town.

He was questioned by all. He told them he "was lonely and wanted a friend"
He was armed.
He had a record.
Therefore considered armed and dangerous.

He was not arrested since he didn't actually do anything wrong but was threatened by the state police that if anything happened to me, ever, they would put him away forever.

Then, they told me he was armed and dangerous and what could have happened and I was lucky because he could have snapped anytime.

I never saw him again

I listened to my intuition after that.

ETA: the state police got involved because a very close family friend worked for them


Bethie
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ScrapWench*
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Posted: 1/27/2013 12:26:44 AM

Oh my god, it was a JOKE

I actually love my children.

I hope that is clarified to your satisfaction


Sorry, I didn't see the or the or the . What? There wasn't any of those you say?? Well, then how the *hell* would I have known you were joking?? Considering your post was on a rather serious thread about failed marriages, sick children and the like, you post was rather incongruous. But thanks for clarifying!<--see how that works?


----Theresa

zombie*grrl
WHO PUT A DICK IN THIS BOX?

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Posted: 1/27/2013 12:37:40 AM
Well heaven forfend I post anything not SERIOUS enough for you. I didn't see the rulez as you defined them.

See how this works? No? I guess you can't see my finger from there. But in the future, I'll know that you're actually dumb enough to think that I would post on this board of all places that I hate my kids, and everyone will need a smiley to clarify.


Enough
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/27/2013 12:48:45 AM

Sorry, I didn't see the or the or the . What? There wasn't any of those you say?? Well, then how the *hell* would I have known you were joking??


Oh come on!
Because of the joke tshirt she mentioned. Because she's been here for 6 years and has never given any reason to think she regrets her kids. Because it's an obviously silly thing to say. Because you have a brain in your head and life experience and realize all those reasons above, and a thousand others.



ScrapWench*
Seems a pity to miss such a good pudding.

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Posted: 1/27/2013 1:03:30 AM

Because it's an obviously silly thing to say. Because you have a brain in your head and life experience and realize all those reasons above, and a thousand others.


That's right, it is a silly thing to say on a thread with other very serious posts. In any other context I would have laughed, but in this case, I was confused, hence, the emoticon. I have a brain in my head, TYVM, and a very good sense of humor, but I did not find her post amusing on this very serious thread.

ETA:

Because she's been here for 6 years and has never given any reason to think she regrets her kids

Sorry! I failed to consult my spreadsheet to see if she had children and if I even remembered that she mentioned them before. My bad.



I'll know that you're actually dumb enough to think that I would post on this board of all places that I hate my kids

I think that your flip post was insensitive given the subject matter on this thread: failing marriages, very ill children, rape, etc. So who is the dumb one now? Can you see *my* finger? No? Well, piss off, then.


----Theresa

zombie*grrl
WHO PUT A DICK IN THIS BOX?

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Posted: 1/27/2013 1:07:20 AM
There was nothing about rape when I posted (you might want to take note of those kinds of things in the future), and if I had known that someone's bad choice of spouse would preclude me making any "flip" comments and therefore have offended you, I would have been sure to start my own thread. Complete with smilies, wench.

ETA: if you're counting Kitten's comments about a molester, I skipped right over that post. My bad. I should have read and carefully considered a choice of smilies before proceeding since you clearly...oh fuck it. You just wanted to be a bitch. Own it.


Enough
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/27/2013 12:22:49 PM

but I did not find her post amusing on this very serious thread.

No, you found it something you could create an imaginary drama over.



Sorry! I failed to consult my spreadsheet to see if she had children and if I even remembered that she mentioned them before. My bad.

Well, if we're to believe your entire claim on this thread, then it would really have upset you enough for you to remember if she had previously said anything on the subject of actually not wanting her children. So no, you don't need a spreadsheet to know that in 6 years, she has never given you any reason to ignore all the cues a rational person, with deductive reasoning skills, can see and reason out that she was making a joke.



In any other context I would have laughed, but in this case, I was confused, hence, the ...
You're really trying to convince us you're this stupid? Carry on then.



melanell
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 1/27/2013 12:44:12 PM

Oh my god, it was a JOKE

I actually love my children.



Don't you wish 2 Peas had a sarcasm sign for some posts?

I can't tell you how often I didn't post something because I was sure there would be peas who took it seriously.

When you speak fluent sarcasm in real life, it can be hard to convey that online. I tend to just say nothing.



ScrapWench*
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Posted: 1/27/2013 3:51:33 PM

. I should have read and carefully considered a choice of smilies before proceeding since you clearly...oh fuck it. You just wanted to be a bitch. Own it.


Do tell how posting a few of these after you post this

I have two children. So I guess I ignored myself twice.

My favorite T-shirt says "It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" across it. My life's motto.

is being a bitch?? Because I didn't catch your snarkiness? Well, you just carry on then!


----Theresa

Mewcat
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 1/27/2013 3:53:42 PM
I got a job working at a law firm that did loan mods before the economy tanked. One of my friends that was a lawyer worked there and she was to be my boss. I found out after I was hired that the co-owner was a creepy male lawyer. Every time he would come near me my "this isn't right radar" would go off.

I told SO and he reminded me to trust my intuition. Before I left I found out that creepy lawyer guy was embezzling money. I was glad to get out of there when I did. They went out of business less than 6 months after I left.


~*Melissa*~

hgiffor
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/27/2013 4:30:18 PM
This just happened yesterday! I pulled into our local Walmart parking lot and into a spot
and just before I shut the car off I had a feeling I should move it. I shrugged it off and shut the car off, pulled the keys, and turned to get my handbag from the back seat. Just as I turned the car pulling in the next spot over hit my car. Ugh! Yikes! The driver was a kid. She just cut the corner was wrong. Bottom line, there was no real damage...just scuffed tire and small scratch above the tire well. I'll tell you what will happen next time I have that feeling, I will act on it.


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peapermint
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Posted: 1/27/2013 4:58:30 PM

I haven't had good outcomes when I was certain I WAS listening to my intuition, gut, or whatever. I'm convinced I don't have that ability.


This! I've learned that I can't trust my "intuition" at all. It must be some other feeling I'm having; it rarely pans out, or if it does, I think it's coincidence.

I believe in intuition; I just don't seem to have much of it myself. It's particularly aggravating in matters of health and safety.

Justlulu
Garden Girl

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Posted: 1/27/2013 6:43:25 PM
I read this thread yesterday and apparently totally forgot.

I was at the top of our stairs last night and just had this feeling that I was going to fall down the stairs and that I should just stay upstairs. Being stubborn I decided I would just be careful and look where I was stepping. Despite looking my foot slipped out of my slipper and I landed on my back mid stair

I dropped the laptop I was carrying on my ankle and bruised it. I just laid on the ground in shock shaking and crying. Ugh. No major issues, but boy do I hurt today, and regret not listening to my inner voice.


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TREZmom
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Posted: 1/27/2013 8:00:15 PM
I knew when we bought our house (in 2006) that it was a mistake. Our realtor didn't have our best interests at heart and we got "taken for a ride" financially. Right after we put in the offer, I had major doubts, but it was immediately accepted and we didn't think we could back out. We should have taken the small loss on the earnest money, because now we're looking at tens of thousands of dollars down the drain.

I have lots of other examples of when I should have listened to my inner voice (mostly revolving around money), but I won't bother going into it here. I could kick myself for all those times that I didn't pay attention.

zombie*grrl
WHO PUT A DICK IN THIS BOX?

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Posted: 1/28/2013 12:08:58 AM
sarcasm isn't snarkiness, moron. You of all people should know the difference.

Enough of this...clearly, you need smilies to be able to properly detect sarcasm and jokes. End of story.

gabbina
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Posted: 1/28/2013 6:44:31 AM


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HerRoyalScrappiness
PeaAddict

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Posted: 1/28/2013 6:50:34 AM
Trezmom.... I could have written your post word for word


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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/28/2013 8:47:28 AM

I was thinking the same thing. As a person with anxiety issues, if I listened to myself every time I had a bad feeling, I'd spend my life curled up in a ball on the floor of my closet.


Glad to know I'm not the only one.


The pea formerly known as GIPfunny

MotherofJackals
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Posted: 1/28/2013 9:09:23 AM
As a child very good friend of mine often spoke of suicide and I never went to an adult about it. She did end up killing herself after high school and I've always felt a bit like it was my fault.
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