| |
cycworker
On dry runs Santa drives the Isuzu
PeaNut 159,331
July 2004
Posts: 9,384
Layouts: 0
Loc: Vancouver Island, BC, Canada
 |  Posted: 2/8/2013 1:36:03 AM
this question is really about theology, so it may be helpful to be a practicing Christian in order to answer it.
I have heard it said that life will have you repeat a lesson until you learn it... like, you'll keep hitting the same roadblock until you get what the experience is meant to teach you. The thing is, I've really heard this from people who I'd consider New Age, and/or those who self-identify as such, or who self-identify as Buddhist.
What I am trying to figure out is whether there a Christian equivalent in terns of beliefs? I am trying to sort something out in my life... a pattern that keeps happening - and it does feel like God keeps allowing it to happen so as to teach me something.
Thoughts? Is that insane? Heretical? |
-Tania... but people who like me call me `Tang`
The secret of a good life is to have the right loyalties and hold them in the right scale of values.
Norman Thomas
US socialist politician (1884 - 1968)
Human and civil rights should NEVER be subject to the tyranny of the majority. Minorities gain legal equality only when those in power come to understand that their unearned privilege is wrong, and enforce change upon society. - ProfessorZed | |
|
|
KittenOnTheKeys
PeaFixture
PeaNut 498,237
February 2011
Posts: 3,059
Layouts: 0
Loc: SW
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 2:30:31 AM
Yes, Christians do believe that.
You will often hear a Christian joke about "not praying for patience" because trials will so follow (to develop patience). You also hear about the "refining fire" to purify one and develop character. Some use 1 Corinthians 3:13 to go with that. |
|
|
kissmevodka
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 130,936
February 2004
Posts: 2,953
Layouts: 35
Loc: Canberra, Australia
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 3:04:36 AM
I personally believe we get the same lessons repackaged until we learn! I call it going around the mountain. 
Have you someone you trust that can pray with and for you to help you? I also believe the teacher comes when the student is ready. God will bring the right people across your path who will help. Be open. You sure sound ready! |
"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."
Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter
| |
|
|
Layce
An Amusing Little Riesling
PeaNut 76,343
March 2003
Posts: 5,625
Layouts: 16
Loc: Past tense.
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 6:59:11 AM
I guess I would have to say, that that is not necessarily something that is taught as a rule or truth of the Christian faith.
As Christians we are given a lot of freedom - and guidance if we ask for it - to learn the life lessons we must learn to become all that we can be.
We do know that every good thing comes from God. So if repeating mistakes is helping to refine you, then well done! Our goal is to give Him a life well lived.
Hope this humble perspective helps
Latte
Layce |
Latte
Layce
take a picture, it'll last longer | |
|
|
moveablefeast
do justice, love mercy
PeaNut 265,707
June 2006
Posts: 11,126
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern Virginia
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 7:09:24 AM
I can't come up with a biblical or theological justification for it, but I also can't come up with a biblical or theological rebuttal of it. Therefore I leave it in the category of individual situational discernment.
So I would say that yes, sometimes God does allow this patterns so that we will learn from them, and be drawn more to Him or to let His work be visible in our lives.
I would also caution that sometimes what we think is a pattern or a cycle is really bondage to something, and what God wants for us is His freedom. I think God intends that we would live in freedom, and so the question of whether it's something we need to learn from or something we need to be freed from is actually important. | |
|
callypea
PeaAddict
PeaNut 113,672
October 2003
Posts: 1,556
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 2/8/2013 9:12:33 AM
I was about to write the same thing as moveablefeast. Sometimes it's bondage to sin. There's a verse in Psalms that says " set me free from my prison so I can serve you". If we don't break free from the bondage/prison we can't fully serve him.
This is something I'm dealing with right now too. In my case I haven't viewed it as bondage until recently but some days I don't want to break free because its comfortable. But that keeps me from going where God wants me to go and keeps me from his blessings. |
|
|
gottapeanow
Full of faith pea
PeaNut 79,417
April 2003
Posts: 9,828
Layouts: 57
Loc: Phoenix area
| Posted: 2/8/2013 9:41:16 AM
I agree w/ MF. I have often seen people trapped by bondages who are stuck in bad situations of their own making.
However, there are sometimes problems in our lives that are not of our own making. James 1 tells us to "Consider it joy" when trials come our way because trials bring perseverance. The trials bring us into a new level of maturity.
First, we do need to look at ourselves to see where the issues are coming from. But some of us are pretty introspective, feel guilty that we are struggling and beat ourselves up over our struggles. We think, "I must be doing something wrong."
That might not be the case. At all. Job, anyone? Joseph?
I am going through some extremely difficult challenges right now. I had a "friend" tell me everything I was doing wrong. She pulled what I call "Job's friend syndrome" on me. Beat you up when you're down. 
When I most needed her support and encouragement, I didn't get it. Any points she was trying to make were completely lost on me because of her method of delivery, the timing of her words, and even the accuracy of her words.
As I have reassessed the situations, I know that I made the right choices. I am holding onto Phil. 1:6. God has begun a good work in me and He will complete it. He will not drop me or leave me hanging. He has awesome plans for me.
Abraham betrayed his wife twice. He gave her to a foreign king. The first time, he didn't learn his lesson. The second time he did. His son, Isaac, was not born at the time. However, he repeated that exact same behavior. I am sure that Abraham and Sarah didn't talk about these events at dinner every night. But yet, Isaac had the same "weak spot" w/i his character.
The things (sin patterns) we allow in our own lives will be repeated in a worse measure in our children unless we properly deal with them in our own lives. Alcoholism is a common modern-day example. Statistics show that the son of an alcoholic father has a 7x greater risk of becoming an alcoholic than the son of a non-alcoholic father. I can link later tonight if anyone wants the documentation on that.
Lisa | |
|
cycworker
On dry runs Santa drives the Isuzu
PeaNut 159,331
July 2004
Posts: 9,384
Layouts: 0
Loc: Vancouver Island, BC, Canada
| Posted: 2/8/2013 11:25:11 AM
When you talk about bondage to sin... would self-sabotage or poor relationship choices fit in that category? |
-Tania... but people who like me call me `Tang`
The secret of a good life is to have the right loyalties and hold them in the right scale of values.
Norman Thomas
US socialist politician (1884 - 1968)
Human and civil rights should NEVER be subject to the tyranny of the majority. Minorities gain legal equality only when those in power come to understand that their unearned privilege is wrong, and enforce change upon society. - ProfessorZed | |
|
|
KittenOnTheKeys
PeaFixture
PeaNut 498,237
February 2011
Posts: 3,059
Layouts: 0
Loc: SW
| Posted: 2/8/2013 11:55:20 AM
When you talk about bondage to sin... would self-sabotage or poor relationship choices fit in that category?
Yes |
|
|
benem
Yo, that's fifty dollars for a T-shirt.
PeaNut 526,154
October 2011
Posts: 5,524
Layouts: 0
Loc: Illinois
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 1:23:49 PM
As far as I know Christians do believe that as well.
It falls under "God has a plan for your life" and "Everything happens for a reason". |
"We are NSBR. We talk about E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.
Diva Cups Merkins Tub Girl Crock Pots Kitten Heels The Hoff HOF Obama Bush Kardashians Shopping Carts Shopping Trolleys Dead Aunt Cookies Trolls Not Trolls Garden Snakes Snails Stripper Poles with or with out Birds In-Laws Scoff-Laws Blogs Borg Paint Colors Dinner Books and Each Other"
--SueSume, 3/21/13
| |
|
|
IleneTell
StuckOnPeas
PeaNut 434,842
August 2009
Posts: 2,427
Layouts: 635
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 1:50:38 PM
From a psychological standpoint, people often tend to engage in the same maladaptive pattern/dynamic that they allow in their life or even bring on, in order to create oppotunities to finally gain mastery of the issue. Once they become more conscious of what they're doing and why and why they keep creating it or allowing it to happen, they can finally resolve it and move past it. |
|
|
gottapeanow
Full of faith pea
PeaNut 79,417
April 2003
Posts: 9,828
Layouts: 57
Loc: Phoenix area
| Posted: 2/8/2013 3:36:05 PM
As far as I know Christians do believe that as well.
It falls under "God has a plan for your life" and "Everything happens for a reason".
From my understanding, that is not what the OP is asking at all. These quotes have nothing to do with her question.
Lisa | |
|
lynnea
BucketHead
PeaNut 92,997
June 2003
Posts: 663
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 2/8/2013 3:39:12 PM
I don't believe that. I don't believe that bad things happen to teach people lessons. I do believe that different people choose to learn through those hard times. I know a lot more about grief and being compassionate because I have seen some hard times. I don't believe God wanted me to be more compassionate so my Mother died to teach me that. | |
|
cycworker
On dry runs Santa drives the Isuzu
PeaNut 159,331
July 2004
Posts: 9,384
Layouts: 0
Loc: Vancouver Island, BC, Canada
| Posted: 2/8/2013 4:05:21 PM
From a psychological standpoint, people often tend to engage in the same maladaptive pattern/dynamic that they allow in their life or even bring on, in order to create oppotunities to finally gain mastery of the issue. Once they become more conscious of what they're doing and why and why they keep creating it or allowing it to happen, they can finally resolve it and move past it.
And again... things like:
*incessant people pleasing to the point of being a doormat;
*self-sabotaging
*not asking for help when you need it....
Would those kinds of things fit here? |
-Tania... but people who like me call me `Tang`
The secret of a good life is to have the right loyalties and hold them in the right scale of values.
Norman Thomas
US socialist politician (1884 - 1968)
Human and civil rights should NEVER be subject to the tyranny of the majority. Minorities gain legal equality only when those in power come to understand that their unearned privilege is wrong, and enforce change upon society. - ProfessorZed | |
|
|
zombie*grrl
AncestralPea
PeaNut 281,551
October 2006
Posts: 4,286
Layouts: 0
| Posted: 2/8/2013 5:38:29 PM
I think it has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with how quick you are to learn a lesson.
Sort of like Pavlov's dog.
I don't see God "letting" things happen repeatedly until you learn the lesson--you are. | |
|
Robbin
PeaFixture
PeaNut 11,958
March 2001
Posts: 3,384
Layouts: 30
 | Posted: 2/8/2013 6:02:28 PM
From a psychological standpoint, people often tend to engage in the same maladaptive pattern/dynamic that they allow in their life or even bring on, in order to create oppotunities to finally gain mastery of the issue. Once they become more conscious of what they're doing and why and why they keep creating it or allowing it to happen, they can finally resolve it and move past it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And again... things like:
*incessant people pleasing to the point of being a doormat;
*self-sabotaging
*not asking for help when you need it....
Would those kinds of things fit here?
I believe yes. I have a bad habit of picking friends that are like my mom, and then struggling through all that it entails! I was taking an abnormal psych class and came to view my pattern as a way to resolve my stuggles with my mom. It is STRANGE how similiar that cause me the greatest pain are the most like my mom...and yet I SEEK THEM OUT!! As does my sister.
I love God, and believe that he gives us many wonderful gifts and lessons, but some of the things in our lives are a creation from being human. I do believe that God can give strength, wisdom, peace, and grace as we move to be more like Him. |
|
|
scrappintoee
luv my bulldoggies
PeaNut 24,213
November 2001
Posts: 5,415
Layouts: 106
 | Posted: 2/9/2013 7:17:45 PM
I don't have an answer to your question, but I totally relate to what you said about trying to sort something out and wondering if God is allowing it to happen to teach me something.....OR, am I choosing to deal with it on my own and not listening to what He wants me to do? I still really have no answer, even though I've searched the bible and other Christian books, and prayed about it A LOT   | |
|
scrappintoee
luv my bulldoggies
PeaNut 24,213
November 2001
Posts: 5,415
Layouts: 106
| Posted: 2/9/2013 7:17:46 PM
I don't have an answer to your question, but I totally relate to what you said about trying to sort something out and wondering if God is allowing it to happen to teach me something.....OR, am I choosing to deal with it on my own and not listening to what He wants me to do?
I still really have no answer, (and I'm tryyyying to be patient---arghh!!) even though I've searched the bible and other Christian books, and prayed about it A LOT | |
|
dreamerpea
Ancient Ancestor of Pea
PeaNut 211,290
June 2005
Posts: 6,555
Layouts: 0
Loc: somewhere dreaming
 | Posted: 2/9/2013 9:02:02 PM
I keep telling my DD you can't run away from unpleasantness. Cause it will follow you where ever you are.
I told her you have to deal with it!
So no I don't think it is heretical at all.
I call it life! |
|
|
scrappintoee
luv my bulldoggies
PeaNut 24,213
November 2001
Posts: 5,415
Layouts: 106
| Posted: 2/14/2013 8:28:59 AM
interesting thread.....anyone else? | |
|
ramblin72
PeaNut
PeaNut 85,321
May 2003
Posts: 254
Layouts: 73
| Posted: 2/14/2013 8:59:47 AM
i personally believe it is an unrealistic view to think the world is conspiring to teach you lessons. for eg, say the lesson is on how to deal with your mother and the way she may criticize you (made up example). does that imply that your mother becomes an unwilling participant in a series of scenarios until YOU learn the life lesson?
that does not make sense to me and assumes the life path of others has to revolve around you until you learn the life lesson
it is more a matter of behavior and how you react to EVERYDAY occurrences.
in psychology there is a whole discussion on errors in thinking and to think that the universe conspires events around you is indicative of those errors. things like illusory correlation, illusion of control, magical thinking. it also why sports people wear lucky socks and jocks and gamblers believe the NEXT spin is the lucky one because they've had 4 bad spins in a row and 4 just happens to be the number of cars they've had and the table is black and so was their last pet dog. the justifications and correlations people can make are mind boggling!
just my opinion | |
|
bunnylady
PeaAddict
PeaNut 93,895
July 2003
Posts: 1,795
Layouts: 79
| Posted: 2/14/2013 9:41:00 AM
I have not found that specific teaching in the Bible or been taught it at church. But I will quote something that I read in a book my brother wrote:
"Because God's general revelation extends to all points of His creation, there may well be traces of truth, beauty, and goodness in many non-Christian belief systems. But we have no warrant for regarding any of these as alternative gospels or separate paths to salvation."
~ from the Amsterdam Declaration.
So if there is a teaching of Buddha or something that you gain from meditation or other Eastern philosophies, I don't think it's heretical to use other teachings to make yourself a better person. I don't think practicing Yoga means you worship the sun. LOL
What this quote seems to be saying, and I concur with it, is that when another belief system teachings something about salvation that is different from what God himself has revealed in the Bible, then that is a part of the system that you cannot espouse.
Just my take. |
|
|
bunnylady
PeaAddict
PeaNut 93,895
July 2003
Posts: 1,795
Layouts: 79
| Posted: 2/14/2013 9:43:58 AM
I'd also say that the book Boundaries is a fabulous text on this. It talks about the 10 Boundaries that are in place in this world, and how you react to them and internalize them absolutely affects how your life plays out.
If you repeatedly fail to set your own boundaries, or repeatedly cross others', things will not be good. But once you learn how to properly set AND respect boundaries, you see a different life open up. Making poor choices for the wrong reasons, or even sometimes for what you think are the "right" reasons, will yield sadness and despair and a lower quality of life.
That's that I got from it anyway.  |
|
|
nlbremer
BucketHead
PeaNut 243,520
January 2006
Posts: 857
Layouts: 43
Loc: Summerville, SC
| Posted: 2/14/2013 9:56:11 AM
I have always been told/taught that sometimes things just happen because we are imperfect people living in an imperfect world; however, I do believe that certain life lessons represent themselves in different ways in order to help us learn something. I don't know that it's Biblical as much as it is about us trying to strive for more in our life - to be the best "me" I can be sort of thing. I have experienced this in my life, and in my case it was also directly related to a talent I have that I was not using as I should have been.
God does not cause bad things to happen to us, but sometimes he does allow them - and there's always lessons to be learned through the trials if we allow ourself to see them. I see it like school - you have chapters of study, and then you have a quiz or a test to see if you grasp the material...not that it's a direct equivalent, but some parallels exist.
I hope this isn't too confusing. Feel free to PM if I can help you in any way! | |
|
