My mom's wedding ring...

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Posted 4/2/2013 by poppyred in NSBR Board
 

poppyred
AlienGreenPea

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Posted: 4/2/2013 12:48:58 PM
My mom passed away in Saturday after a brief illness. I have her wedding ring and I'm wondering what others here have had done with their mom's rings. It's got three larger diamonds in the middle and three smaller ones on either side.


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KikiPEA
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Posted: 4/2/2013 12:50:38 PM
ETA: I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers and hugs to you.

If you wouldn't wear it as it is, I would have the stones taken out and have them reset into something you WOULD wear, like another ring, necklace...




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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/2/2013 12:54:17 PM
I'm very sorry for the loss of your mother.


I would probably wear the ring on a necklace if I didn't want to wear it as a ring for myself.

ETA: A necklace like this one.



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eebud
Doxie Pea Mom

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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:01:05 PM
I am so sorry about your loss.

For me, I think it would depend on the setting and if it was something that was special on its own. For example, my mother had her mother's ring. It was a beautiful setting in a rose gold. She never wanted to do anything to the setting. My brother got married a little over a year ago and she gave him the ring for his new wife..........who also loves the ring. She was asking me about it because she was concerned that she was getting something that she thought maybe should go to me. I told her that I thought the ring was perfect for her and it really is. The style fits her perfectly. So, in this case, the ring stayed in tact. However, my other grandmother had a solitaire that is supposed to come to me some day if my dad doesn't sell it first. I might have that put into something else because it is a very simple setting, nothing really sentimental or special about the setting.





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TinaFB
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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:04:06 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss.

My father inherited his grandmother's wedding ring. He had the diamonds removed and put into necklaces for my sister and I. They were our high school graduation presents.

My stepmom has her grandfather's wedding band. She had it sized down and wears it as her every day wedding band.


Tina


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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:11:55 PM
I'm very sorry for your loss. I would not make any quick decisions regarding the ring & get more than one jeweler's opinion. My mom had her mother's ring re-done & I was not impressed with the jeweler's work.




froggy one
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:38:57 PM
I am sorry for your loss. My mother had a pretty engagement ring. She had it reset once and Dad had on made as matching pinky ring. When Mom died I got her ring. It is beautiful and I wear it whenever I have a chance to dress up or special occasions (which is very rare these days). I like to wear it places I think Mom would want to be, it makes me feel close. I am going to future DIL's shower Saturday and will probably wear it there.


Karen

lindywholoveskids
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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:45:51 PM
I agree about waiting for a while, and seeing what moves you.

about 2 years after my mom died I offered the large diamond in her engagement ring. She and our son-in-law worked with a designer to create a beautiful ring with two sapphires on either side of the diamond.

I felt really good about giving it to them, as my mom had intended for me to distribute the jewelry. I have offered some pieces to my niece but she passed on them.

ihavetoomuchstuff
PeaAddict

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Posted: 4/2/2013 1:50:44 PM
sorry for your loss

Mimima
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Posted: 4/2/2013 3:02:41 PM
I'm so sorry, may her Memory be Eternal.

I agree with waiting for a bit - perhaps wear it now and then during this time, to see if you like it as is or want to get it reset.


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fairycakes
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Posted: 4/2/2013 5:12:38 PM
sorry for your loss.
I had my dads wedding ring remade into something I designed myself,and i think of him every time i wear it.

Gravity
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/2/2013 5:17:38 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. ((HUGS))


Basket1lady
AncestralPea

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Posted: 4/2/2013 5:31:24 PM
My dad kept my mom's ring.

When she died, I was getting married in a few weeks and already had my rings. I suggested that Dad give it to my brother (20 at the time). But Dad was worried that if my brother divorced, it wouldn't stay in the family.

So Dad had it made into a ring for him. It has Mom's diamond solitaire in the middle, with two rubies on either side. My brother will eventually get the ring. I have all of my mom's other jewelry, so it's nice that my brother will have something from Mom.


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giatocj
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 4/2/2013 5:47:42 PM
I am very sorry for your loss.

I wear my mom's wedding ring, but it is a tri-color gold band with no stones. Maybe you could have the stones reset into another ring or even a necklace.

Darkangel090260
PeaFixture

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Posted: 4/2/2013 6:49:09 PM
If it was me and there where granddaughter, I would have the 3 large stones set in to single stone ring for the oldest three. The smaller stone i would turn in to a small necklace and earring set and keep it.

As for the setting i would melt it down and make my self or a Grandson band from it.


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Pea-T-A-Mom
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Posted: 4/2/2013 8:36:29 PM
I'm sorry for your loss.

I inherited my grandmother's engagement ring when my mother passed. My mother's rings went to my older sister.

My grandmother's ring was a solitaire diamond, bright white, flawless without a jeweler's glass, and even with, the appraiser was quite impressed.

I inherited it when I turned 18, it had been held in trust before then

I did not feel comfortable wearing it, so I kept it in a safety deposit box.

I was proposed to when I was 30, and my intended did not buy a ring, as he had bought me a lot of jewelry that I did not wear much, because it was not my taste. He planned to bring me shopping for my engagement ring.

I started wearing grandma's ring right away, to show everyone I was engaged. But when DH and I went shopping for wedding rings, I saw a setting I absolutely loved, but it had a diamond in the middle that was nowhere as brilliant as my grandma's diamond.

We had the diamond from my grandma's ring reset into the jeweler's ring, and I had an amythyst placed into my grandma's gold. Now I have two rings that I love!


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pennyring
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Posted: 4/2/2013 8:48:50 PM
I wear my Gramma's rings. I just had 'em sized to my fingers.




Cindy March
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Posted: 4/2/2013 9:18:34 PM
Sometimes I wear my mother's wedding band on a chain around my neck.


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omarakbt
AncestralPea

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Posted: 4/2/2013 10:56:20 PM
My grandmother's engagement ring I wear on occasion, it has a ruby as the center stone so something I wear when we go out. I'm wearing her band along with the rings I got for my 25th and 30th wedding anniversaries.
My sister in law took the stones out of her grandmother's ring and had a birth stone ring made for my DD on her 16th birthday ( April birthday and WAY hard to find an appropriate birth stone ring) and she had earrings made for her high school graduation. My SIL and BIL are childless by choice so she enjoyed giving something very special of hers to our DD


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Posted: 4/2/2013 11:53:00 PM
I'm sorry for your loss.

Don't rush into any decisions.

I have my mother's rings. Fortunately, all of them. I also have two daughters and they will one day get them. That weighs heavily on my decision to do nothing to change them. My girls don't know my mother (they were 2 and not yet in existence when she died at age 60) so this is an important link.

One other thing stuck in my mind when deciding to not change them: my mum once told me that she regretted getting very little of her mother's jewellery. It had been split between my uncle and my mom, with uncle giving his wife those items. Uncle has a son only. My mum wishes the jewellery had stayed in the female line of the family. I kind of have to agree. <shrug>



poppyred
AlienGreenPea

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Posted: 4/3/2013 9:32:05 AM
Thanks for all your ideas and kind words. I'm planning to wear it on my right index for the memorial service. I agree that not rushing into any decision is best right now.


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FlaMom
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Posted: 4/3/2013 9:59:06 AM
(((hugs)))


Tammy

MergeLeft
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Posted: 4/3/2013 10:07:20 AM
My mom's wedding ring will
go to my oldest daughter (her oldest granddaughter) by family tradition. I have to say that it's tempting to have it reset for me in the mean time, though. It's a much larger and nicer diamond than mine!


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piapea
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/3/2013 10:51:52 AM
My mom's engagement ring came to me, and I also held for my brothers their wedding ring sets (original and 25th anniversary.) DD got married in 2007 and we took mom's engagement ring and and had a modern pendant designed for the diamond, her fiance had earrings made in a matching design. Something old and something new.

My DS, and both DNs took the wedding bands and and small diamonds and created their own rings.

We were thrilled that the symbols of their forty years of marriage is part of their four grand children's future.

Mallie
PeaFixture

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Posted: 4/3/2013 11:05:35 AM
My MIL had a total of four diamonds in two rings and my SIL very nicely had the four diamonds set into pendants for each of the four granddaughters.

I have my mother's rings, but I never liked them and her marriage ended in divorce. I am going to keep the diamond (don't know what I'm going to do with it yet), but I'm selling th gold next week.

piapea
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 4/3/2013 11:15:19 AM
My mom's engagement ring came to me, and I also held for my brothers their wedding ring sets (original and 25th anniversary.) DD got married in 2007 and we took mom's engagement ring and and had a modern pendant designed for the diamond, her fiance had earrings made in a matching design. Something old and something new.

My DS, and both DNs took the wedding bands and and small diamonds and created their own rings.

We were thrilled that the symbols of their forty years of marriage is part of their four grand children's future.

3PSoup
AncestralPea

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Posted: 4/3/2013 12:56:37 PM
First I want to tell you how very sorry I am for the loss of your mom. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it losing a mom.

My mom is one of my best friends. We talk daily, have coffee or lunch out weekly.

((hugs)) to you

My opinion on her ring is the same as others have said; wait for a while until the shock has worn off. Then make your decision.

My DM has a considerable amount of jewelry and at one time I would have reset all of it because it was/is not my style. But my opinion has changed. The diamonds/stones don't mean as much to me anymore as the choice she has made in the overall ring setting. It is "her" style. She didn't pick out her ring(s) because the diamond/stone was such and such size or quality. She chose it because she liked the overall setting.

I guess the long and short of it is, I don't think I would change it. Appreciate the ring for what it is. As you grow older your tastes change. Maybe someday you will really like the setting. You never know. And, you would hate to look back and be sorry you changed it. JMHO

Restless Spirit
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Posted: 4/3/2013 1:17:05 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss.

When my dad died, my mother gave me his ring. It is just a big wide gold band.

When she died many years later, I inherited her wedding band (my siblings have no children). Her band just has a few tiny diamond chips that were reset rom her original wedding set that she wore through years before. They both got new bands for their 25th anniversary that us kids paid for.

I wore mom's band on and off for a few years. When our DD got engaged, she asked if she could carry her grandparents wedding rings down the aisle. I gave them both to her and the florist attached them with ribbon into her bouquet. She gave me back the rings and later after her honeymoon, I returned the rings to her as a gift. She was extremely close to my parents, especially her grandmother.

My DH inherited his Dad's wedding ring. His Mom's diamond from her original band had been reset in a new band several years earlier and *that* reset wedding band came up missing after her death. While going thru boxes and boxes of junk in the garage (she was a hoarder), I found her original, engraved wedding ring set - minus the original diamond. We gave DD her grandfather's ring (also engraved) and will some day put a diamond in her other grandmothers original set and give that to her, too.

Then our DD will have all four of her grandparents wedding rings, which will go to her only child, her son. She will eventually also get mine and my DH's wedding rings, too.

I'm glad that she will have all of them and can then decide how she wants to use or pass down these precious family heirlooms.


Karen
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