My Dogs Attacked Baby Jesus - Updated in OP

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Posted 12/9/2005 by Dharma in NSBR Board
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Deep
PeaFixture

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:05:02 PM

Did anyone else witness this or can you sneak jesus back into the manger later tonight?


Do I detect a skulk?


"Why can't I get a little ahead instead of a bigger behind?"

2Marbles
I <3 Capt. Tightpants!

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:13:46 PM
Lawnmower!!!!! bwhahahah!
Ok...this is so darned hilarious!!

Just one question....Do they sell the Savior alone? LOL

Do you go in the store and ask:
"Excuse me. Do you have any Baby Jesus'?"



2Marbles


Harrow: "I know him. And I think he's a psychotic lowlife."
Mal: "And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community."

Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:15:24 PM
Excuse me - I'm looking for the savior - can I find him here?


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:17:26 PM
I'm going into town, I'll know if I run into Dharma at Sears if she's asking for Jesus....


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

Scrapmom-of-2
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:18:50 PM
PIMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm dying here...no wait...that is the Easter holiday when Jesus..., well you know the story!






Deep
PeaFixture

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:26:01 PM
I now have the picture of someone coming to your home to minister: "Have you found Jesus?"

Uh..yeah...uh in the garage on the mower. ..



"Why can't I get a little ahead instead of a bigger behind?"

Leahr3011
BucketHead

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Posted: 12/9/2005 9:27:14 PM
LMAO This is hilarious!



GrinningCat
Proudly Canadian

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Posted: 12/9/2005 10:15:10 PM

I now have the picture of someone coming to your home to minister: "Have you found Jesus?"

Uh..yeah...uh in the garage on the mower. ..
I am so using that the next time I'm ministered to!

This whole thread is freaking hysterical!



Filet-o-Mich
and 3 small fries

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Posted: 12/9/2005 10:22:59 PM
Too funny!



mnpeanut
BucketHead

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Posted: 12/9/2005 10:24:53 PM
Thanks for the good laugh. If you replace it, the dogs may get it again.



elendae
>EPpea<

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Posted: 12/9/2005 10:29:15 PM
Funniest. 2Peas. Thread. Ever!

Thanks for the laugh!


Linda
my blog {bliss}
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wholarmor
I'm NOT a sack sniffer!

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Posted: 12/9/2005 11:48:55 PM
So did the Sherriff actually come? I bet the police department got a good laugh at of that. "Someone stole Jesus."
I'm glad you were able to find another one. That's a miracle in itself.


Kris
Mom to Kyrie(11), Isaiah(9), and Jayden(6)
my blog


M o l l y
Blue Cow

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Posted: 12/9/2005 11:48:56 PM
Is this proof, or not, that dogs know more than we do and we should trust their instincts? There seemed to be some discussion of that fact in a thread the other day.

But oh, no. Bad doggy, bad doggy.


**************************************
We are all in this together. One nation, with liberty and justice for all.
**************************************
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
**************************************
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more
will be asked. - Luke 12:48


M o l l y
Blue Cow

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Posted: 12/9/2005 11:50:44 PM

Bring the Savior back here RIGHT NOW
That is the funniest thing I've read in ages. Thanks for the laugh.


**************************************
We are all in this together. One nation, with liberty and justice for all.
**************************************
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
**************************************
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more
will be asked. - Luke 12:48


love labs
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Posted: 12/9/2005 11:58:11 PM
Just when I didn't think this story could be any funnier (more funny?)...the OP posts an update! ROFLOLPIMP funny!


NO the dogs may not have the stolen Jesus to play with
OMGosh! Where is my inhaler--I'm laughing so hard right now I'm gonna need it!

(Dharma, could you at least post the offenders' "mug" shots?!?)


----------------------------------------------------------

If life is a journey, shouldn't you be moving along?

kimlizzy
DownUnder Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 12:02:19 AM
ROFL Too funny.



love labs
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Posted: 12/10/2005 12:05:11 AM

They were in their 60s and I think they thought kids had vandalized their nativity.
They're probably relatives of the older folks on the next block over from us who decorate their cement Snow White and the & Dwarfs statues for Christmas.

One year, a couple of the dwarfs were stolen...and it made the "incident" made the Police Log in our local paper! We're a city of close to 100,000; guess we should be thankful that our major crime is stealing concrete dwarfs! LOL!

(and of course, it's nothing compared to the K-9 vs. the Nativity caper of 2005!)


----------------------------------------------------------

If life is a journey, shouldn't you be moving along?

~snowpea~
What to say, what to say....

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Posted: 12/10/2005 12:08:47 AM
dh and i both laughed out loud - bring the saviour back noW! (and he isn't drunk!!!!!!)


`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`

This is the great theatre of life. Admission is free but the taxation is mortal. You come when you can and leave when you must. The show is continuous. Good-night.
Robertson Davies

* Harmony *
Puddle Jumper

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Posted: 12/10/2005 12:31:57 AM
I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I'm going to wake my BF up! ROFL


"Bring the Savior back here RIGHT NOW!"
That line almost did me in



Cara in TX
Paper Angel in Bulletin Board Hell

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Posted: 12/10/2005 12:46:12 AM

This is the hardest I've laughed on this board in a while!


Me too! DS (12 next month) just came in from a late showing of Narnia and caught me. He said, Are you crying? No, honey, Mommy is just laughing so hard tears are coming out. So I read him the story and he thought it was hilarious.

Then he came back in the room and said, Tell the dog lady:

Her dogs have redefined "Away in a Manger!"



~Cara




DS#1~16yo DS#2(Autistic)~13yo
I've got the b**bs in the family, and they can be used for evil or for good. ~Qwendy, June, 2005
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revirdsuba
Wise~old Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 1:19:06 AM
Just toooooooooo funny.. TFS!!

Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/10/2005 1:24:34 AM
hahahaha wonder if they thought you were trying to push an agenda hahaha!

Maybe the dogs were trying to find God...


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

Skybar
Perfect Peaing

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Posted: 12/10/2005 1:49:00 AM
where was the 'warning label' on this post????

so glad I wasnt' talking a drink when I read it!
LOL! soooo funny!

These doGs are liberal, right? LOL !

and yes, they should be immediately enrolled in a religion class! (or loving your neighbor...and not coveting your neighbbor's property...); ok, they're doGs.... just stick to the basic 10 commandments!

I do hope you can get pics of the 'fallen' Mary and knocked over Joseph... and mangled Baby Jesus for a LO!
maybe the neighbors will let you reenact the crime?
ok, without the dogs loose ! ?
This would make a great book - Who Stole Jesus?

(those doGs wouldn't be Roman soldiers, would they?)



"A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education."
- President Theodore Roosevelt

On June 28, 1787, as Governor of Pennsylvania, Benjamin Franklin hosted the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia, where he moved:

"That henceforth prayers imploring the assistance of Heaven, and its blessing on our deliberations, be held in this Assembly every morning."

Franklin wrote April 17, 1787:

"Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters."

Benjamin Franklin wrote his epitaph:

"THE BODY of BENJAMIN FRANKLIN - Printer. Like the cover of an old book, Its contents torn out, And stripped of its lettering and gilding, Lies here, food for worms; Yet the work itself shall not be lost, For it will (as he believed) appear once more, In a new, And more beautiful edition, Corrected and amended By The AUTHOR."

Craftybanshee38
PeaNut

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:07:14 AM
"Bring the Savior back here RIGHT NOW!"


OMG! That is so funny. I have visions of absolute pandemoneum while baby Jesus gets carried off, Joseph and Mary go for a burton and the donkey and hay is in disarray

Hope you have a 'christmas miracle' and get a new baby Jesus



Sunshine36616
God peas protect me from your followers

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:16:10 AM
Aww, I feel kind of bad for the neighbors and their vintage baby Jesus



chrystyne731
**L O S T** Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:52:25 AM

""Bring the Savior back here RIGHT NOW!"


LMAO... sorry.... it's just..... hee hee.... funny mental picture.... would make a good SNL skit! Anyone seen the skit where Cheri Oteri is the lady in curlers on her front porch and is always trying to compete w/her neighbor and each other's outside manger scenes??? Man.... I would have love to seen this.



LMAO-I would so want to see this on SNL!!!


Chrystyne





M o l l y
Blue Cow

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Posted: 12/10/2005 4:51:37 PM
This thread deserves a BTT

I'm taking it that the dogs were making a style statement rather than a political or religious statement. Nativity from the 70s? It had to be an eyesore, right?


**************************************
We are all in this together. One nation, with liberty and justice for all.
**************************************
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
**************************************
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more
will be asked. - Luke 12:48


M o l l y
Blue Cow

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Posted: 12/10/2005 5:14:59 PM
The Devil comes in many guises.


**************************************
We are all in this together. One nation, with liberty and justice for all.
**************************************
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
**************************************
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more
will be asked. - Luke 12:48


veggieburger
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 5:19:05 PM
*the Jesus Snatcher* (why do I hear the theme from Dragnet!)

You are a delight Dharma ... I wish you'd relent on the doggies grounding and let them go to the big light display as I'm sure there's another story for us peas to be had there!


"Dogs are our link to paradise.
They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent.
To sit with a dog on a hillside on a
glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden,
where doing nothing was not boring - it was peace."

~Milan Kundera


iamkate
PeaAddict

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Posted: 12/10/2005 5:28:40 PM
well I didn;t shoot liquid thru my nose, but my dh did hear me laughing and after I read him the post I heard him chuckling a few moments later.

A video of that would be worth a mint... nice writing Dharma!!!

Glad everything worked out for you!!


**********************************************************
Kate- wife to Joe, mommy to Allison/7 and Joey/4

"NAW--- Kate... you're JUST THE RIGHT amount fruity." SharlaG 1-17-06



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Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/10/2005 5:30:01 PM
but what cute Jesus snatchers they are!


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

PharmaPea
PeaAddict

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Posted: 12/10/2005 5:55:47 PM
OMG.....this is so funny already...I cannot wait for more pictures....
Can you imagine the police blotter if Mr Neighbor had called?



~Lisa~

eebud
Doxie Pea Mom

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Posted: 12/10/2005 6:15:24 PM
This is hilarious!! Thanks for the laugh!!





Hans on left, Bud in middle, Gretchen on right

Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/10/2005 6:38:35 PM

PharmaPea, it would be nothing out of the ordinary here where lost herds of sheep and mushroom thievery appear in the paper on a regular basis. You're in the same state, you know how it is.


Oh but what of the Beavers football player getting drunk and kidnapping the gay ram from the college of agriculture....

Favorite news story - EVER!



~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/10/2005 6:42:38 PM
It was quite the topic of discussion around town for a few days.

Why couldn't they just tip cows like normal drunk football players...


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

annabug
Peace Out Girl Scout

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Posted: 12/10/2005 7:36:34 PM
This is toooooo funny! It's something my dog would do. . .she knows instinctively what I will chase her to get back, and what she can have. She sneaks to grab "treasures" and RUNS!

She would like to be a Savior Snatcher, too. . .


ttfnjoanna
***********



"Like what you do, do what you like."--Life is Good

"I've made some empty promises in my life. That was by far the most generous." Micheal Scott.

chrystyne731
**L O S T** Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 7:45:57 PM
I am still PIMP over this, but what BEAUTIFUL dogs you have.


Chrystyne





molove
Gabby Pea

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Posted: 12/10/2005 7:56:45 PM
Dharma,
that is the funniest story I have read on here in a long, long time.

It's a classic, HOF material. Save it.

Plus, the pictures of those dogs, in repose, just perfect. Thank you for this.

Anymore stories you would like to share? Cuz I'm all ears.



Chopped Liver *Ü*
Running from the drama llama

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:04:29 PM
Too funny!!

Btw, I am a liberal that has no desire to run off with baby Jesus in my mouth.


Sam



I live to die another day...until I fade away. Until the End

PharmaPea
PeaAddict

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:19:34 PM
I know...I am thinking of the entries in our local paper's police blotter.....
Poor Kya...evil Jesus snatcher would have a record in addition to her one way ticket to Hell..


~Lisa~

PghScrapper
Waiting for Godot

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:32:00 PM
I'm getting caught up tonight from a busy week, and just read this .....

OMG - funniest thing I've read in a LOOOONG time!



-----------------------------------------
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people. -Eleanor Roosevelt

DanaPea
Quietly sneaking

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Posted: 12/10/2005 8:46:40 PM
That's it. This is the funniest thread of the year. We can all stop trying



grumpypea
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 12/10/2005 9:24:40 PM
i am sorry but that is just too funny!!!!!!
TFS

scrappyknees
Mostly Lurking

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Posted: 12/10/2005 10:21:51 PM
ROFLMBO! I work at a church. I have GOT to share this story with the Pastor...


~Nancy~



**GypsyGirl**
Well, Bless Her Heart.......

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Posted: 12/11/2005 12:40:21 AM
Dharma - you mentioned in another thread that my Dandy looks like your Luther. You're right, they do resemble! If it's any consolation, mine would have been right there stealing Baby Jesus with your dogs. I'm laughing at them barking at the donkey!


Toni
Professional Expat Wife, Hell Holes are my Specialty!


Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
Lao Tzu (604 BC - 531 BC)



love labs
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Posted: 12/11/2005 11:48:57 AM
btt'ing--'cuz this is just too darn funny and we could use some laughs on page 1 this morning


----------------------------------------------------------

If life is a journey, shouldn't you be moving along?

Miss Jen
Mommy to Snowflakes

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Posted: 12/14/2005 5:16:32 PM
oh my gosh. i literally almost died of laughter (which doesn't mix well with an already hacking cough)



Mely
Right you are Ken

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Posted: 12/14/2005 5:18:10 PM
did you find a replacement savior yet?


~~~~ end of message ~~~~


Mom to James, Ryan, Dani and Mikey

melissa ...
PeaFixture

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Posted: 12/14/2005 6:53:33 PM
btt


************************************************


::*~it is what it is~*::


pet_lovr
AncestralPea

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Posted: 12/20/2005 6:57:21 PM
BTT because I needed a laugh tonight and this did it

Thanks for the best story in the world for this holiday season


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