S/O Santa letter--Don't open in front of believers!

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Posted 11/14/2012 by twinsmom-fla99 in NSBR Board
 

twinsmom-fla99
AncestralPea

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Posted: 11/14/2012 10:45:52 AM
I saw a couple of posts on the other thread (and I've seen many here in the past) lamenting the end of Santa because Christmas isn't as fun. I've posted a S/O because (a) I don't want anyone to think I'm a "Santa hater" posting on that thread b/c I'm NOT, and (b ) I don't want to invite any "Santa haters" to that thread with my question.

So I was just wondering, for the peas who no longer have any believers, do you really find Christmas to be less "fun" without Santa?

For me personally, Christmas is maybe MORE fun without the guy in the red suit. I never encouraged my kids to believe once they truly doubted. When they asked the big question, I asked them "what do you think?", and when I could tell that they honestly had doubts (as opposed to being upset that an older child had said something), then I told them the truth. Suddenly, all those conflicting stories about Santa told in the Christmas specials made sense since they knew they were fiction.

I love the fact that we aren't "stressed"about the Santa gift that always seems to be so hard to find. Two of mine are "worriers" who were in a constant state of anxiety regarding whether or not Santa would get what they wanted. The other asked for the "hot" toy of the season every.single.year. LOL! And unfortunately, she was disappointed a couple of times b/c I just couldn't find what she wanted and wasn't willing to pay four or more times the retail price on ebay. I always steered her to an alternate choice, but in her heart, she was still hoping for the hot toy.

I love not having to tip-toe around the house until midnight or later b/c they are so excited they can't get to sleep and Santa can't come until they are. Without the worry of playing Santa, we can go to Midnight Mass, which is such a wonderful experience for the girls.

I love that their gift requests are more realistic now that they know that Santa doesn't make gifts magically appear and that some things are not in our budget. They aren't focused on wondering why Santa brought the neighbor's kid $1000 worth of gifts while they only had one gift each (of considerably less value) under the tree from Santa (the rest from Mom and Dad).

Each of my kids found out the truth when they were only 8. The oldest enjoyed being in on the fun of playing Santa for her younger sisters. Of course, the twins don't have younger siblings to play Santa for, but they have enjoyed playing along for their younger cousins. They also enjoy shopping for gifts for the Angel Tree knowing that the little kids who get them will think they are from Santa.

So . . . .

Do your kids think Christmas is "less fun" without Santa? I haven't seen any difference in the level of excitement about the holiday with mine. And honestly, it is much easier and less stressful for me and DH, so we actually enjoy it more.

And if you do think it is less fun, what kinds of things have you done to bring the fun back?

maddiebsmom
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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:12:46 AM
I think that this year may be the last for my oldest, I have printed both of the letters that are on two peas. I agree with you and am hoping that this is how I feel as the years pass. I am at a point where I am ok with letting go of Santa and moving on to the next phase of parenting through the holidays. I love the whole Santa experience but agree that there are so many conflcting stories in books, movies, other families traditions etc. It is also stressful to keep it all hidden and last year I started to "slip up". As a kid I just slowly figured it out and it was a fine transition. I am hoping for the same with my girls as the years go by. Thanks for providing such an upbeat perspective to the after santa years.

UkSue
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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:17:59 AM
Perhaps I'm in the minority, but I have never felt stressed by Santa. I always told my kids that I had to send money to Santa to help pay for gifts, and that is why some children get more than others. I love creeping around doing to stockings, lol, and as for the hot toy stuff, my kids have never been told they will definitely get the hot toy. There has never been any real tension over anything like that. I absolutely love the magic of Christmas Eve, the expectation and excitement so thick you could cut it with a knife.

Only my youngest would be likely to go to Midnight Mass with me, as the older two aren't Christians (yet- I keep hoping!) but I must admit, I really love going alone and having absolute peace to pray and enjoy it.
My youngest is 10 and to be honest, I'm not sure he really believes anymore, but like you, I will carry on until he asks the heartbreaking question.

I will be extremely sad at that point- however my stepson has a 1 year old and it all just goes on again with the next generation


It's not the passage of time that heals. It's what you do with that time.

Luvnlifelady
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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:19:12 AM
I actually like it better without "believers." It's so much easier when the kids know I (with some help from DH) put the whole thing together. They are aware of budgets also (but I usually go over anyway).

They are part of the festive build-up to the big day and it takes the pressure off of delivering something that they asked for "from the big guy."




twinsmom-fla99
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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:24:53 AM

Thanks for providing such an upbeat perspective to the after santa years.
You're welcome LOL! That's actually kinda why I posted. I was afraid I would be sad when the whole thing ended, but I just found that the fun is still there--it's just "different".

twinsmom-fla99
AncestralPea

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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:28:00 AM

as for the hot toy stuff, my kids have never been told they will definitely get the hot toy.
I didn't tell my kids they would get the hot toy either. As I stated in my post, I always steered them to an alternate choice.

But the expectation is still created by other kids who insist Santa will bring whatever you want if you believe hard enough. Or by those "miracle of Christmas" specials where the kid gets what s/he wanted through the magic of Santa. Although in most cases, those specials show Santa giving the child a different kind of gift than a toy (Dad comes home for Christmas, missing pet returns, Mom gets over devastating illness, etc.) But still, the "miracle worker" reputation persists.

TinCin
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Posted: 11/14/2012 11:32:55 AM
I have enjoyed Christmas both ways. My kids are now adults, no grands but Christmas is still a ball around here. I still stuff stockings too. I tried to quit but they were not happy campers. I have been told that I should do the stockings until I am ancient and decrepit.


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tinkgumby
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 11/14/2012 12:49:32 PM
I have had fun both ways. Now that my older boys know, I haven't had to watch what I say about getting stocking stuffers, etc. Not that we'd ever give up stockings!

Now that we have a toddler again, we are doing the Santa thing, but fairly low-key.


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Loydene
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Posted: 11/14/2012 2:31:13 PM
I've always thought it has been more fun since DS understood the "truth". Now, everyone is Santa: One year DS surprised me by decorating his room. He strung garland and put up his Christmas tree and brought me in totally as a surprise. DS thinks about filling stockings - and gets things AND fills them.

For us -- DS understanding that everyone is "Santa", that *making* Christmas is part of the fun, has brought even more joy to the season.

606slz
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Posted: 11/14/2012 2:38:04 PM
I got in trouble here once because I admitted telling my 8 year old the truth (he had repeatedly asked if he was real) I won't lie to my kids in that situation...


So I was just wondering, for the peas who no longer have any believers, do you really find Christmas to be less "fun" without Santa?




No way!!! We love it. It is the best time of year at my house.
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