Do you think Thanksgiving is stressful because others say it should be

Two Peas is Closing
Click here to visit our final product sale. Click here to visit our FAQ page regarding the closing of Two Peas.

Posted 11/14/2012 by scrappinghappy in NSBR Board
1 2 >

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 38,979
May 2002
Posts: 5,873
Layouts: 71
Loc: Anywhere one or more of my kids are

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:36:41 PM
Do you get stressed about Thanksgiving because those around you are stressed.

For me it's just another meal, just more people than usual. And most of those people will be bringing something to share so just fun times and no stress for me.


"you bunch of Hippocrates" - troll on SBR board
"What's a Hippocrate? A big box used to transport large African animals?" - SuPeaNatural

You gotta watch this video:
Right then, right then, I laughed so hard my water broke...and I wasn't even pregnant - Jeanne Robertson, age 65


PeaNut 116,261
November 2003
Posts: 25,809
Layouts: 102

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:38:06 PM
I don't really find Thanksgiving stressful. Christmas tends to run in that direction for me.


May we be consumed with the Creator of all things rather than with things created.

6 rings - no cheating! Go STEELERS!

Holding a grudge is letting someone live rent-free in your head.

Bring me that horizon!

PeaNut 239,162
December 2005
Posts: 29,196
Layouts: 417
Loc: The final frontier

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:39:22 PM
It doesn't stress me out at all. I love getting ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas, cooking, cleaning, focusing on family. It's like a little break from real life stress and worries.

boring + nerdy

PeaNut 52,817
October 2002
Posts: 27,974
Layouts: 145
Loc: Oregon

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:42:03 PM
I don't find Thanksgiving stressful at all, and that's why it's my favorite holiday. Just time with family and friends with delicious food. What's stressful about that?


PeaNut 30,457
February 2002
Posts: 1,084
Layouts: 2
Loc: Texas

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:45:41 PM
One of best things about Thanksgiving is that my two favorite football teams play on that day... works out so good for us.

Detroit game first and then Dallas... every year.... yay

~~ Marianne ~~


PeaNut 65,877
January 2003
Posts: 13,181
Layouts: 30
Loc: So CA

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:46:36 PM
Not really although I need to finish up a couple of projects that are currently on the dining room table. I plan to pick up things like potatoes tomorrow just so it is done. Then I just have the perishables to pick up next week. I think once you cook the meal a few times it really isn't all that stressful. Of course we have a small family and everyone gets along so that right there takes most of the stress out of it. I don't invite any trouble makers


Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 274,935
August 2006
Posts: 5,850
Layouts: 8

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:50:23 PM
This is the first year I won't be cooking for 30+ people with all the china, crystal and table scapes. It should be stress free, but 1 person in our family has made any get together extremely stressful. I'm pretty pissed that it will probably be more stressful than it usually is. I plan to drink heavily.

I do get stressed, but usually because I do so much. Dammit one day I want people to remember how much I do and rarely get thanked. Sorry, I took a bitter pill today.

I think anytime you get all the family together at an appointed time and expect everyone to help out , it's going to be stressful.

Stay Gold, Ponyboy

PeaNut 41,779
July 2002
Posts: 33,738
Layouts: 58
Loc: The Left Coast

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:50:55 PM
I have zero stress about Thanksgiving, and even if I were the main cook in the house (which I am not) I'd still not stress.

"She is too fond of books, and it has turned her brain." - Louisa May Alcott

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 38,979
May 2002
Posts: 5,873
Layouts: 71
Loc: Anywhere one or more of my kids are

Posted: 11/14/2012 5:55:13 PM
For me the meal itself won't be stressful but the fact that my house is topsy turvy, furniture all in the wrong rooms, half the floor missing cause of water damage, down one bathroom cause of said water damage, all my crystal, china and everything else from the first floor down in the basement also because of previously mentioned water damage. And said water damage occured 6 months ago and contractor has been messing with us. So after all THAT stress, cooking for 30+ should be a piece of cake, right


"you bunch of Hippocrates" - troll on SBR board
"What's a Hippocrate? A big box used to transport large African animals?" - SuPeaNatural

You gotta watch this video:
Right then, right then, I laughed so hard my water broke...and I wasn't even pregnant - Jeanne Robertson, age 65

Thrift Ninja

PeaNut 226,011
October 2005
Posts: 23,312
Layouts: 40
Loc: Rite Aid

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:10:33 PM
We stress about making sure the house is clean and organized. Our house is small, so it is easily taken over with clutter.


PeaNut 33,625
March 2002
Posts: 9,769
Layouts: 0
Loc: Washington State

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:12:36 PM
No stress at all in my family - except from my mom. And that is her issue, she is one of those people that has to stress and it's too bad since it makes the holiday less enjoyable for the rest of us

~ Dori ~

Miss Lerins Momma
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 151,660
June 2004
Posts: 13,597
Layouts: 38
Loc: KY

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:28:40 PM
It's not really stressful for us, unless you count the stress on our pants by the end of the day

We start the day with breakfast with the inlaws, have lunch with my Aunt's family, then dinner with my family. Thankful that we have places to go and family to see!

Trolls *heart* me!!


PeaNut 53,328
October 2002
Posts: 6,323
Layouts: 2
Loc: Bellaire, TX

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:31:59 PM
Thanksgiving is not stressful at all for us - we made reservations!

Peaing under the Radar

PeaNut 61,691
January 2003
Posts: 12,447
Layouts: 0
Loc: In the Middle

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:47:48 PM
I don't find Thanksgiving to be stressful at all. Sure, getting the meal done and on the table can sometimes be a logistical challenge, but it's just a meal. My mother was a terrible cook. There was a year when the turkey was way undercooked at 5 pm when it came out of the oven and we didn't eat until 8. There were many years when the turkey was tough, or it totally fell apart when my dad carved it. There was one year when she set the oven on fire and we had to go to my grandma's for dinner. But they were all great family Thanksgivings, and my siblings and I look back on those days with laughter and good feelings. I refuse to stress because stress would ruin my enjoyment of the holiday.

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 31,617
March 2002
Posts: 9,964
Layouts: 59
Loc: southern new mexico

Posted: 11/14/2012 6:57:15 PM
I don't allow the holidays to become stressful.

Marilyn (now in New Mexico!!)
SCUBA diving and SCRAPPING Mom of two

The Banana Under the Couch Pea

PeaNut 295,941
February 2007
Posts: 8,089
Layouts: 0
Loc: Somewhere over the rainbow...

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:13:38 PM
No... But I don't host.

I'm not a big fan of Thanksgiving anyways. I don't care for most of the food and I don't like football. I do have the day off this year, so it will be nice to be able to spend it with DH's family.

What if everything is an illusion & nothing exists

PeaNut 82,319
April 2003
Posts: 15,081
Layouts: 39

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:25:35 PM
The only thing I find stressful about Thanksgiving is the mountain of dishes it produces.


PeaNut 86,316
May 2003
Posts: 538
Layouts: 6
Loc: Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:42:13 PM
I don't *do* stress. I have a big family, so when we all gather we are talking at least 50 people, plus there are also other pieces of family or friends who don't have anywhere to go.

We never host it at someones home, no one has a house big enough for one, but it helps in the sense that everyone knows they have to pitch in to clean up, etc. We make up a menu, each family makes 1 - 2 items and that is that. We meet, we eat, we laugh, we visit and play games.


Pea -a Rican

PeaNut 270,600
July 2006
Posts: 2,421
Layouts: 17
Loc: Voting for OBAMA!

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:45:39 PM

I don't allow the holidays to become stressful.

me too!


PeaNut 288,074
December 2006
Posts: 4,556
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:47:37 PM
I never found it stressful...if you are the one preparing the meal, as long as you properly plan, you shouldn't be stressed.


PeaNut 191,815
February 2005
Posts: 2,220
Layouts: 4
Loc: Moorpark, CA

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:53:05 PM
Preparing for the Thanksgiving meal, and everything else related to that, doesn't stress me out in the least. When you compare it to Christmas, when I'm dealing with all the presents, wrapping, parties, etc., along with meal, there is absolutely no comparison. I LOVE preparing for Thanksgiving!


2014 Goal:

Organize my entire house one drawer, cabinet, nook and cranny at a time!


PeaNut 379,678
June 2008
Posts: 3,789
Layouts: 16
Loc: Enjoying the summer sun!

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:55:35 PM
I think Thanksgiving is an easy meal to cook. Sometimes, the last few minutes of trying to get everything out hot at once is a little harrowing...but in general, everything is pretty simple. (Oh--and I keep a couple jars of Williams Sonoma gravy base on hand, because gravy is hard for me!)

And the men do the dishes 'round here.

Scrapmaven is stalkin my Kitteh!

PeaNut 159,334
July 2004
Posts: 14,077
Layouts: 0
Loc: Left Coast

Posted: 11/14/2012 7:59:29 PM
It's a bit stressful for me, because it' s "my" holiday. And it's not the meal prep that's stressful, it is the house prep. Much rearranging of furniture, extra cleaning, making everything wheelchair accessible. Placing large tables all around tends to be tricky when working with wheelchairs.

Approximately 30 people will come to my house for Thanksgiving. I have a big family. DH has a smaller family, who will join in too.

BUT, the other family holidays will be hosted by other people. I host Thanksgiving, then sit back the rest of the year while other relatives have us over.


Slow Poke Pea

PeaNut 857
June 1999
Posts: 6,168
Layouts: 37
Loc: Central Florida

Posted: 11/14/2012 8:06:15 PM
I love Thanksgiving - it's my favorite holiday, and while it can be a little hectic, I don't find it stressful at all.

I get the whole week off, so that makes things a lot easier! I used to get stressed our over Christmas because I tried to make everything "perfect" for everyone and I had unrealistic expectations. Now I'm much more "chill" about things and I have a much nicer holiday season


& the Velcro dog

PeaNut 133,429
February 2004
Posts: 9,969
Layouts: 0
Loc: Somewhere over the Judgy-pants Rainbow

Posted: 11/14/2012 8:12:01 PM
Thanksgiving is not stressful for me.

I am responsible for the entire meal. Days of planning. Days of preparation. 2 days of whirlwind baking & cooking. I it!

The difference between genius and stupidity is genius has its limits. ~Albert Einstein

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 168,696
September 2004
Posts: 8,526
Layouts: 0
Loc: Northern California

Posted: 11/14/2012 9:18:24 PM
I'm amazed that so many peas do the whole thing themselves.
For our family, its hard to coordinate, but it's a group effort.

Thrift Whisperer

PeaNut 114,407
November 2003
Posts: 22,729
Layouts: 66
Loc: At the intersection of Hooterville and Stars Hollow

Posted: 11/15/2012 5:32:02 AM
You may have a point.

I host and have for a few years. I do everything cooking wise. I enjoy it.

I'm fortunate to have a schedule that allows me to bake, prep, shop in the days leading up to it. I imagine that helps.

Uploaded with iPhone client


PeaNut 30,940
February 2002
Posts: 4,786
Layouts: 0
Loc: NJ

Posted: 11/15/2012 5:42:48 AM
I don't find it stressful, but I don't host Thanksgiving. I do seem to have some sort of pumpkin pie curse, which over the years has involved a can of evaporated milk that I discovered was spoiled upon opening it, forgetting to put in the sugar (which resulted in something akin to a pumpkin quiche) and one year, remembering ten minutes down the road that the pie was still at home.

I do cook a similar meal at Christmas and find that the only thing that's tricky is juggling the number of side dishes.

I can understand how it can be stressful, though, in that what one person finds enjoyable another finds challenging, and that in some cases you have family dynamics going on that are beyond the control of the hostess.

Here's to a stress-free Thanksgiving for everyone!


PeaNut 407,137
January 2009
Posts: 1,319
Layouts: 0
Loc: New Jersey

Posted: 11/15/2012 5:46:51 AM
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday so no stress for me. It's always just the 5 of us so there's no pressure to get the meal on the table at a certain time. We all just go with the flow and enjoy the day. Having said that, it's still a very special holiday for us all. I have the added bonus of my birthday being on Thanksgiving this year.



PeaNut 146,748
May 2004
Posts: 4,306
Layouts: 1

Posted: 11/15/2012 5:55:24 AM
for me it is another day - bigger meal, and takes longer to prepare than a usual meal. Not a lot of stress, but ours is not a big family gathering.

I think it is stressful for people because they feel they have to live up to an ideal meal, that has to be perfect.


PeaNut 412,905
February 2009
Posts: 1,708
Layouts: 5

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:25:04 AM
We don't have thanksgiving here but Christmas or any other "gathering" doesn't stress me out. I have 4 sons, so I'm used to feeding a crowd.

"you bunch of Hippocrates" - troll on SBR board
"What's a Hippocrate? A big box used to transport large African animals?" - SuPeaNatural
Wow OP, I feel kinda famous now that I've been quoted in a siggy.


PeaNut 194,574
March 2005
Posts: 2,914
Layouts: 3
Loc: God's Country

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:33:04 AM
Growing up, Thanksgiving was always a stressful time. My mom would go NUTS trying to get everything ready. Us girls bore the brunt of that. So I actually grew to hate Thanksgiving. Then I got married, and had to go to his parents house one year! Totally different scenerio! They were relaxed, and it was fun!

Now that I'm divorced, I hate it again. I'm at the point where I could take it or leave it. If it weren't for my kids, I'd probably never celebrate it again.

low-information individual

PeaNut 190,373
February 2005
Posts: 8,196
Layouts: 0
Loc: wherever the army sends us

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:34:32 AM
It used to be when I was young but not anymore. The only thing remotely stressful is the prospect of sharing MIL's house with 13 other people for the weekend but I've let it go that my SIL is lazy and I will just pitch in extra.

A veteran is someone who, at one
point in his life, wrote a blank check
made payable to 'The United States of
America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.'


PeaNut 123,049
January 2004
Posts: 2,472
Layouts: 0
Loc: My couch

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:54:47 AM
Uh duh, no. It's stressful for some people, but not for others. Depends on an individual's personal threshold for stress along with what they are facing with the meal. Simply because you see it as just another meal does not others feel stress only because they think they're supposed to. What a rude question.

Uploaded with iPhone client


PeaNut 498,237
February 2011
Posts: 3,407
Layouts: 0
Loc: SW

Posted: 11/15/2012 7:20:45 AM
Mom always made Thanksgiving stressful. It took me a few years to unwind but it is now pretty stress free. Mom was one of those who always had to have certain recipes and they had to be done a certain way - to the point of using certain mixing bowls and serving bowls. There is one bowl I still call the "olive bowl" because of that.

I don't have to have this recipe or that recipe. In fact, none of my family or friends will eat those that she had to have. We keep it simple and...ack!...healthy! Works for us.

Shih Tzu Mommy
Million dollar camera, 10 dollar lock!

PeaNut 224,352
September 2005
Posts: 24,004
Layouts: 0
Loc: Right here

Posted: 11/15/2012 7:45:36 AM
Never understood it. My step mother used to FREAK OUT. Preparation, time management and expanded shopping. Nothing to get overwrought about.

Dog people are a special breed!


PeaNut 197,450
March 2005
Posts: 2,314
Layouts: 0
Loc: Epicenter of Awesome

Posted: 11/15/2012 7:51:22 AM
I don't get stressed over holidays or birthdays. I've been through some fairly traumatic situations and I always tried to use those as the my litmus test. If it's worse than any of those things then I'll stress otherwise it's no biggie.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. Mark Twain


PeaNut 48,645
September 2002
Posts: 4,583
Layouts: 151
Loc: Second star to the right, then straight on till morning....

Posted: 11/15/2012 7:58:03 AM
My Thanksgiving is very relaxed with my in-laws. My family, on the other hand, always has lots of drama and my aunt insists on doing everything "my way or the high way". She is a food-hoarder and prepares almost everything with ingredients that are expired so everyone is afraid to eat anything.


Don't shop...Adopt.

PeaNut 263,696
June 2006
Posts: 5,365
Layouts: 0
Loc: Home Sweet Home

Posted: 11/15/2012 8:22:51 AM
Not stressful for me. I am SO excited about this Thanksgiving. My sister and her DH are coming all the way from California to Florida. I can't wait. I haven't seen her for 4 years. Her DH is leaving on Monday and she is going to stay for an extra week so we can do some girl stuff.


While we may never
know the pain or
struggles of a rescue dog
the love they show
is unlike any other...


PeaNut 141,445
April 2004
Posts: 2,897
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/15/2012 8:29:05 AM
Not stressful. I ordered a Thanksgiving meal from a local restaurant. My guests can talk about me being 'lazy' and not cooking but the fact is...the food is good and free for them so they can shut up or not come.

Doxie Pea Mom

PeaNut 52,841
October 2002
Posts: 33,484
Layouts: 25

Posted: 11/15/2012 9:44:18 AM
I don't get stressed over Thanksgiving. I used to host almost every year. What was stressful to me was when I had others helping with the meal and bringing a dish I was depending on for the meal. Some people are not real reliable. When I quit depending on anyone else and doing it all myself, my stress level went way down. If someone insisted on bringing something, I would have them bring something that it was ok if it didn't show up. For instance, an extra veggie or an extra dessert. No biggie if they call at the last minute saying that can't make it.

This year, DH and I are spending Thanksgiving with my brother, SIL and bunch of their friends on a houseboat. I am bringing gumbo. I will make it ahead of time so Thanksgiving day will be a breeze, enjoyable, no stress, day............unless traffic is bad getting there. LOL We plan to leave really early though so traffic should not be an issue.

Hans on left, Bud in middle, Gretchen on right

* Happy Camper *

PeaNut 223,117
September 2005
Posts: 16,361
Layouts: 22
Loc: Heffalump Hollow

Posted: 11/15/2012 9:46:36 AM
I also do not find it stressful! It is just another meal with a bit more company I don't set 'fancy' tables, we have fun decorating, more home spun I guess -- but nothing over the top. I actually find it less stressful because there is so much help if I want it, a drink in hand, music on, laughter and conversation!!!


PeaNut 522,402
October 2011
Posts: 724
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/15/2012 10:15:56 AM
Being stressed takes all the fun out of it.

We did Thanksgiving once with DH's family and his SIL made this big deal about everything having to be special and perfect and complained about everything from the place where the turkey was being carved to the way it was being carved, all under the guise of things having to be "perfect." She wasn't even doing 95% of the cooking. It ended up making everyone miserable. So much for perfect.

We've since stopped doing Thanksgiving with his family; this year, 30+ people in my family rented two beach houses for the week. Everyone is of the same mindset, we always have a blast, and we expect dinner to not be perfect. We don't set the table, it's done buffet style and if we have to eat in shifts because there isn't room, then that's what we do. It's just food. We enjoy hanging out with our family and having a good time.


PeaNut 211,963
June 2005
Posts: 2,383
Layouts: 0
Loc: SW Virginia

Posted: 11/15/2012 10:21:36 AM
No stress here either...Cooking a turkey is the easiest thing in the world and the rest in fun in my book. I love to cook Thanksgiving dinner. If everything isn't perfect, so what? We will find something to eat!

I used to spend a week cleaning my house and now I just do my general weekend clean up and let it go. No one cares!! As long as they go home full and we get to spend time together, that's all that matters.

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 289,166
December 2006
Posts: 19,658
Layouts: 7
Loc: Southern California

Posted: 11/15/2012 10:23:09 AM
It's only stressful from a traffic standpoint for us. It normally takes twice as long to go the same distance. No fun when you're creeping along for over 2 hours!

Right Pea on the Left Coast

PeaNut 230,510
November 2005
Posts: 18,306
Layouts: 10
Loc: SoCal

Posted: 11/15/2012 11:22:30 AM
I don't think it's stressful either.

Then again, I don't have notions of a "perfect" holiday either. We have traditions, family, things that go right, things that go wrong. Eh, that's the way it goes.

*Delphinium Twinkle*
I'm just a pea:)

PeaNut 163,613
August 2004
Posts: 78,773
Layouts: 236
Loc: *Sunny Southern California*

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:17:32 PM
Nope. I don't let other people stress effect me.

proud Fiskateer #269
{My Blog}
*My Scraproom*
Uploaded with iPhone client


PeaNut 370,270
April 2008
Posts: 3,076
Layouts: 22

Posted: 11/15/2012 6:21:43 PM
Back in the day when we had to drive to relatives' that were hosting Thanksgiving it was stressful. We'd need to wake up at about 6 AM, get stuck in traffic for about 4 hours, quickly eat and make small talk and then get back in the car to turn around and get up super early the next day for work. It was miserable so we haven't done it for the last few years. We just stay home and do a small immediate family turkey day with the four of us.

This year some extended family will be joining us and it should be fun. Nothing about the holiday stresses me out except for the driving and running around. Since it's at our house I will be exempt from any of that!

Ruby Slippered Pea

PeaNut 74,765
March 2003
Posts: 5,903
Layouts: 3
Loc: Over the Rainbow

Posted: 11/15/2012 7:19:45 PM
I don't find preparing for Thanksgiving to be stressful at all. We always go over to my brother and sister-in-law's house, so I bake the day before and bring several side dishes. The cooking is easy. However, the actual event at our in-law's house is stressful for me. They always have a large crowd of people. His relatives, their friends and their adult kid's boyfriends and girlfriends and extended friends. It gets loud and there is always lots of crosstalk. I love my peace and quiet so being in an atmosphere where there are lots of very talkative and loud people is especially hard for me to endure for long periods of time. I am usually exhausted when we get home in the evening.

Scrapmaven is stalkin my Kitteh!

PeaNut 159,334
July 2004
Posts: 14,077
Layouts: 0
Loc: Left Coast

Posted: 11/16/2012 9:25:36 PM

Thanksgiving is my least favorite holiday. It's just food. Nothing fun like Santa, Easter Bunny, cool costumes. It's okay. I like to eat, but it's not stressful. Probably because it's never held at my house.

That's why it is my favorite holiday!!

No stress over gifts. Just family, enjoying each other.


1 2 >
Show/Hide Icons . Show/Hide Signatures
{{ title }}
{{ icon }}
{{ body }}
{{ footer }}