Do you think Thanksgiving is stressful because others say it should be

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Posted 11/14/2012 by scrappinghappy in NSBR Board
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scrappinghappy
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:36:41 PM
Do you get stressed about Thanksgiving because those around you are stressed.

For me it's just another meal, just more people than usual. And most of those people will be bringing something to share so just fun times and no stress for me.


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purpledaisy
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:38:06 PM
I don't really find Thanksgiving stressful. Christmas tends to run in that direction for me.


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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:39:22 PM
It doesn't stress me out at all. I love getting ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas, cooking, cleaning, focusing on family. It's like a little break from real life stress and worries.



busypea
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:42:03 PM
I don't find Thanksgiving stressful at all, and that's why it's my favorite holiday. Just time with family and friends with delicious food. What's stressful about that?

Quinlove
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:45:41 PM
One of best things about Thanksgiving is that my two favorite football teams play on that day... works out so good for us.

Detroit game first and then Dallas... every year.... yay




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scrapper100
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:46:36 PM
Not really although I need to finish up a couple of projects that are currently on the dining room table. I plan to pick up things like potatoes tomorrow just so it is done. Then I just have the perishables to pick up next week. I think once you cook the meal a few times it really isn't all that stressful. Of course we have a small family and everyone gets along so that right there takes most of the stress out of it. I don't invite any trouble makers


Patti

Nantini
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:50:23 PM
This is the first year I won't be cooking for 30+ people with all the china, crystal and table scapes. It should be stress free, but 1 person in our family has made any get together extremely stressful. I'm pretty pissed that it will probably be more stressful than it usually is. I plan to drink heavily.

I do get stressed, but usually because I do so much. Dammit one day I want people to remember how much I do and rarely get thanked. Sorry, I took a bitter pill today.

I think anytime you get all the family together at an appointed time and expect everyone to help out , it's going to be stressful.



Mimima
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:50:55 PM
I have zero stress about Thanksgiving, and even if I were the main cook in the house (which I am not) I'd still not stress.


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scrappinghappy
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Posted: 11/14/2012 5:55:13 PM
For me the meal itself won't be stressful but the fact that my house is topsy turvy, furniture all in the wrong rooms, half the floor missing cause of water damage, down one bathroom cause of said water damage, all my crystal, china and everything else from the first floor down in the basement also because of previously mentioned water damage. And said water damage occured 6 months ago and contractor has been messing with us. So after all THAT stress, cooking for 30+ should be a piece of cake, right


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pennyring
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:10:33 PM
We stress about making sure the house is clean and organized. Our house is small, so it is easily taken over with clutter.



gmcwife1
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:12:36 PM
No stress at all in my family - except from my mom. And that is her issue, she is one of those people that has to stress and it's too bad since it makes the holiday less enjoyable for the rest of us


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Miss Lerins Momma
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:28:40 PM
It's not really stressful for us, unless you count the stress on our pants by the end of the day

We start the day with breakfast with the inlaws, have lunch with my Aunt's family, then dinner with my family. Thankful that we have places to go and family to see!








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SmartyPants71
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:31:59 PM
Thanksgiving is not stressful at all for us - we made reservations!

mdoc
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:47:48 PM
I don't find Thanksgiving to be stressful at all. Sure, getting the meal done and on the table can sometimes be a logistical challenge, but it's just a meal. My mother was a terrible cook. There was a year when the turkey was way undercooked at 5 pm when it came out of the oven and we didn't eat until 8. There were many years when the turkey was tough, or it totally fell apart when my dad carved it. There was one year when she set the oven on fire and we had to go to my grandma's for dinner. But they were all great family Thanksgivings, and my siblings and I look back on those days with laughter and good feelings. I refuse to stress because stress would ruin my enjoyment of the holiday.

guzismom
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Posted: 11/14/2012 6:57:15 PM
I don't allow the holidays to become stressful.



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Woobster
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:13:38 PM
No... But I don't host.

I'm not a big fan of Thanksgiving anyways. I don't care for most of the food and I don't like football. I do have the day off this year, so it will be nice to be able to spend it with DH's family.

PierKiss
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:25:35 PM
The only thing I find stressful about Thanksgiving is the mountain of dishes it produces.



ScrappinCally
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:42:13 PM
I don't *do* stress. I have a big family, so when we all gather we are talking at least 50 people, plus there are also other pieces of family or friends who don't have anywhere to go.

We never host it at someones home, no one has a house big enough for one, but it helps in the sense that everyone knows they have to pitch in to clean up, etc. We make up a menu, each family makes 1 - 2 items and that is that. We meet, we eat, we laugh, we visit and play games.


Carrie

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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:45:39 PM

I don't allow the holidays to become stressful.


me too!



recap.pea
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:47:37 PM
I never found it stressful...if you are the one preparing the meal, as long as you properly plan, you shouldn't be stressed.

mom22reds
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:53:05 PM
Preparing for the Thanksgiving meal, and everything else related to that, doesn't stress me out in the least. When you compare it to Christmas, when I'm dealing with all the presents, wrapping, parties, etc., along with meal, there is absolutely no comparison. I LOVE preparing for Thanksgiving!

Sonia


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Katybee
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:55:35 PM
I think Thanksgiving is an easy meal to cook. Sometimes, the last few minutes of trying to get everything out hot at once is a little harrowing...but in general, everything is pretty simple. (Oh--and I keep a couple jars of Williams Sonoma gravy base on hand, because gravy is hard for me!)

And the men do the dishes 'round here.



Pea-T-A-Mom
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Posted: 11/14/2012 7:59:29 PM
It's a bit stressful for me, because it' s "my" holiday. And it's not the meal prep that's stressful, it is the house prep. Much rearranging of furniture, extra cleaning, making everything wheelchair accessible. Placing large tables all around tends to be tricky when working with wheelchairs.

Approximately 30 people will come to my house for Thanksgiving. I have a big family. DH has a smaller family, who will join in too.

BUT, the other family holidays will be hosted by other people. I host Thanksgiving, then sit back the rest of the year while other relatives have us over.


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CarolT
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Posted: 11/14/2012 8:06:15 PM
I love Thanksgiving - it's my favorite holiday, and while it can be a little hectic, I don't find it stressful at all.

I get the whole week off, so that makes things a lot easier! I used to get stressed our over Christmas because I tried to make everything "perfect" for everyone and I had unrealistic expectations. Now I'm much more "chill" about things and I have a much nicer holiday season


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Posted: 11/14/2012 8:12:01 PM
Thanksgiving is not stressful for me.

I am responsible for the entire meal. Days of planning. Days of preparation. 2 days of whirlwind baking & cooking. I it!




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lindywholoveskids
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Posted: 11/14/2012 9:18:24 PM
I'm amazed that so many peas do the whole thing themselves.
For our family, its hard to coordinate, but it's a group effort.

writermom1
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Posted: 11/15/2012 5:32:02 AM
You may have a point.

I host and have for a few years. I do everything cooking wise. I enjoy it.

I'm fortunate to have a schedule that allows me to bake, prep, shop in the days leading up to it. I imagine that helps.



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KatieBPea
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Posted: 11/15/2012 5:42:48 AM
I don't find it stressful, but I don't host Thanksgiving. I do seem to have some sort of pumpkin pie curse, which over the years has involved a can of evaporated milk that I discovered was spoiled upon opening it, forgetting to put in the sugar (which resulted in something akin to a pumpkin quiche) and one year, remembering ten minutes down the road that the pie was still at home.

I do cook a similar meal at Christmas and find that the only thing that's tricky is juggling the number of side dishes.

I can understand how it can be stressful, though, in that what one person finds enjoyable another finds challenging, and that in some cases you have family dynamics going on that are beyond the control of the hostess.

Here's to a stress-free Thanksgiving for everyone!



CMHS
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Posted: 11/15/2012 5:46:51 AM
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday so no stress for me. It's always just the 5 of us so there's no pressure to get the meal on the table at a certain time. We all just go with the flow and enjoy the day. Having said that, it's still a very special holiday for us all. I have the added bonus of my birthday being on Thanksgiving this year.


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TXDancermom
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Posted: 11/15/2012 5:55:24 AM
for me it is another day - bigger meal, and takes longer to prepare than a usual meal. Not a lot of stress, but ours is not a big family gathering.

I think it is stressful for people because they feel they have to live up to an ideal meal, that has to be perfect.

SuPeaNatural
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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:25:04 AM
We don't have thanksgiving here but Christmas or any other "gathering" doesn't stress me out. I have 4 sons, so I'm used to feeding a crowd.


"you bunch of Hippocrates" - troll on SBR board
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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:33:04 AM
Growing up, Thanksgiving was always a stressful time. My mom would go NUTS trying to get everything ready. Us girls bore the brunt of that. So I actually grew to hate Thanksgiving. Then I got married, and had to go to his parents house one year! Totally different scenerio! They were relaxed, and it was fun!

Now that I'm divorced, I hate it again. I'm at the point where I could take it or leave it. If it weren't for my kids, I'd probably never celebrate it again.




ksuheather
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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:34:32 AM
It used to be when I was young but not anymore. The only thing remotely stressful is the prospect of sharing MIL's house with 13 other people for the weekend but I've let it go that my SIL is lazy and I will just pitch in extra.



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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:54:47 AM
Uh duh, no. It's stressful for some people, but not for others. Depends on an individual's personal threshold for stress along with what they are facing with the meal. Simply because you see it as just another meal does not others feel stress only because they think they're supposed to. What a rude question.


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KittenOnTheKeys
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Posted: 11/15/2012 7:20:45 AM
Mom always made Thanksgiving stressful. It took me a few years to unwind but it is now pretty stress free. Mom was one of those who always had to have certain recipes and they had to be done a certain way - to the point of using certain mixing bowls and serving bowls. There is one bowl I still call the "olive bowl" because of that.

I don't have to have this recipe or that recipe. In fact, none of my family or friends will eat those that she had to have. We keep it simple and...ack!...healthy! Works for us.



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Posted: 11/15/2012 7:45:36 AM
Never understood it. My step mother used to FREAK OUT. Preparation, time management and expanded shopping. Nothing to get overwrought about.



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Posted: 11/15/2012 7:51:22 AM
I don't get stressed over holidays or birthdays. I've been through some fairly traumatic situations and I always tried to use those as the my litmus test. If it's worse than any of those things then I'll stress otherwise it's no biggie.


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ilovepaper
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Posted: 11/15/2012 7:58:03 AM
My Thanksgiving is very relaxed with my in-laws. My family, on the other hand, always has lots of drama and my aunt insists on doing everything "my way or the high way". She is a food-hoarder and prepares almost everything with ingredients that are expired so everyone is afraid to eat anything.


Andrea

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Posted: 11/15/2012 8:22:51 AM
Not stressful for me. I am SO excited about this Thanksgiving. My sister and her DH are coming all the way from California to Florida. I can't wait. I haven't seen her for 4 years. Her DH is leaving on Monday and she is going to stay for an extra week so we can do some girl stuff.



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Posted: 11/15/2012 8:29:05 AM
Not stressful. I ordered a Thanksgiving meal from a local restaurant. My guests can talk about me being 'lazy' and not cooking but the fact is...the food is good and free for them so they can shut up or not come.

eebud
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Posted: 11/15/2012 9:44:18 AM
I don't get stressed over Thanksgiving. I used to host almost every year. What was stressful to me was when I had others helping with the meal and bringing a dish I was depending on for the meal. Some people are not real reliable. When I quit depending on anyone else and doing it all myself, my stress level went way down. If someone insisted on bringing something, I would have them bring something that it was ok if it didn't show up. For instance, an extra veggie or an extra dessert. No biggie if they call at the last minute saying that can't make it.

This year, DH and I are spending Thanksgiving with my brother, SIL and bunch of their friends on a houseboat. I am bringing gumbo. I will make it ahead of time so Thanksgiving day will be a breeze, enjoyable, no stress, day............unless traffic is bad getting there. LOL We plan to leave really early though so traffic should not be an issue.





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Posted: 11/15/2012 9:46:36 AM
I also do not find it stressful! It is just another meal with a bit more company I don't set 'fancy' tables, we have fun decorating, more home spun I guess -- but nothing over the top. I actually find it less stressful because there is so much help if I want it, a drink in hand, music on, laughter and conversation!!!



jjjulee
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Posted: 11/15/2012 10:15:56 AM
Being stressed takes all the fun out of it.

We did Thanksgiving once with DH's family and his SIL made this big deal about everything having to be special and perfect and complained about everything from the place where the turkey was being carved to the way it was being carved, all under the guise of things having to be "perfect." She wasn't even doing 95% of the cooking. It ended up making everyone miserable. So much for perfect.

We've since stopped doing Thanksgiving with his family; this year, 30+ people in my family rented two beach houses for the week. Everyone is of the same mindset, we always have a blast, and we expect dinner to not be perfect. We don't set the table, it's done buffet style and if we have to eat in shifts because there isn't room, then that's what we do. It's just food. We enjoy hanging out with our family and having a good time.

LBP
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Posted: 11/15/2012 10:21:36 AM
No stress here either...Cooking a turkey is the easiest thing in the world and the rest in fun in my book. I love to cook Thanksgiving dinner. If everything isn't perfect, so what? We will find something to eat!

I used to spend a week cleaning my house and now I just do my general weekend clean up and let it go. No one cares!! As long as they go home full and we get to spend time together, that's all that matters.

Luvnlifelady
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Posted: 11/15/2012 10:23:09 AM
It's only stressful from a traffic standpoint for us. It normally takes twice as long to go the same distance. No fun when you're creeping along for over 2 hours!



AthenainCA
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Posted: 11/15/2012 11:22:30 AM
I don't think it's stressful either.

Then again, I don't have notions of a "perfect" holiday either. We have traditions, family, things that go right, things that go wrong. Eh, that's the way it goes.

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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:17:32 PM
Nope. I don't let other people stress effect me.


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tinaev
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Posted: 11/15/2012 6:21:43 PM
Back in the day when we had to drive to relatives' that were hosting Thanksgiving it was stressful. We'd need to wake up at about 6 AM, get stuck in traffic for about 4 hours, quickly eat and make small talk and then get back in the car to turn around and get up super early the next day for work. It was miserable so we haven't done it for the last few years. We just stay home and do a small immediate family turkey day with the four of us.

This year some extended family will be joining us and it should be fun. Nothing about the holiday stresses me out except for the driving and running around. Since it's at our house I will be exempt from any of that!

~*Laura*~
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Posted: 11/15/2012 7:19:45 PM
I don't find preparing for Thanksgiving to be stressful at all. We always go over to my brother and sister-in-law's house, so I bake the day before and bring several side dishes. The cooking is easy. However, the actual event at our in-law's house is stressful for me. They always have a large crowd of people. His relatives, their friends and their adult kid's boyfriends and girlfriends and extended friends. It gets loud and there is always lots of crosstalk. I love my peace and quiet so being in an atmosphere where there are lots of very talkative and loud people is especially hard for me to endure for long periods of time. I am usually exhausted when we get home in the evening.







Pea-T-A-Mom
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Posted: 11/16/2012 9:25:36 PM

Thanksgiving is my least favorite holiday. It's just food. Nothing fun like Santa, Easter Bunny, cool costumes. It's okay. I like to eat, but it's not stressful. Probably because it's never held at my house.


That's why it is my favorite holiday!!

No stress over gifts. Just family, enjoying each other.


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