Does anyone else have a hard time spending money?

Two Peas is Closing
Click here to visit our final product sale. Click here to visit our FAQ page regarding the closing of Two Peas.

Posted 11/16/2012 by SillyRabbit in NSBR Board
 

SillyRabbit
PeaFixture

PeaNut 104,457
September 2003
Posts: 3,094
Layouts: 12
Loc: Where The Grass Is Blue

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:20:44 PM
Silly question I know, but I am kicking myself for cancelling an order because I am too frugal. I want an ipad. Very badly. I ordered one from the website and was so excited. Then, I started thinking I didn't really need it. We have a laptop and I have a Kindle Fire what do I need an ipad for? Completely talked myself out of it and cancelled my order. Ugh.

The thing is we can afford it. It's not like we're rolling in the dough, but we take care of our needs and plenty of wants. But I am so frugal, I can't allow myself to splurge unless something is broken. We still have our enormous, boxy tv because I don't see the point in replacing it since it works fine. DH doesn't care one way or the other. He's fine with the old stuff, but doesn't mind if we spend money if we want something. It's totally my hangup.

We had a rough financial patch a few years ago that we busted our asses to overcome so I know that fear of going back there always weighs on my mind when making purchasing decisions. We have plenty in our emergency fund, but I still think about what ifs. I think about how having something shiny and new is great, but being able to sleep at night without financial worries is so much better.

Please tell me I'm not alone in this. Better yet, talk me into getting the dang ipad.


Cindy

Uploaded with iPhone client

freecharlie
What happens in NSBR, stays in NSBR

PeaNut 109,127
September 2003
Posts: 22,066
Layouts: 4
Loc: Colorado

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:24:42 PM
You have the money to take care of your needs and some of your wants because you are frugal, so that isn't a bad thing.

Why do you want the Ipad?
Is there something else you won't be able to get/afford if you get one?
Will you next egg be hurt by this purchase?
Will the Ipad make you happy?
If you don't spend the money on an Ipad, what else are you going to do with it?


Tribbey: I believe, as long as Justice Dreifort is intolerant toward gays, lesbians, blacks, unions, women, poor people, and the first, fourth, fifth, and ninth amendments, I will remain intolerant toward him! [to Ainsley] Nice meeting you

IScrapCrap
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 570,639
October 2012
Posts: 2,808
Layouts: 0
Loc: pea formerly known as GIPfunny

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:28:15 PM
Yes, especially spending it on myself.

PEArfect
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 452,048
January 2010
Posts: 6,190
Layouts: 9
Loc: Indiana

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:35:06 PM
I always talk myself out of purchases. I've been stewing over a possible purchase for a few days now. I could save over $40 on the purchase, but I keep asking myself "do I really need it?" The discount ends tomorrow so I need to decide sometime tomorrow.


Jen


SillyRabbit
PeaFixture

PeaNut 104,457
September 2003
Posts: 3,094
Layouts: 12
Loc: Where The Grass Is Blue

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:43:51 PM
If I don't get the ipad, I will end up putting the money in savings and eventually buy something for my kids that they probably don't need. Seriously though, it's almost like it causes me to have a panic attack to spend money (other than everyday stuff). I swear I blame my boss. She is exactly like this, and she has rubbed off on me. We need counseling. And she's a psychotherapist.


Cindy

Uploaded with iPhone client

KikiNichole

PeaNut 69,597
February 2003
Posts: 27,801
Layouts: 2
Loc: Follow the Yellow Brick Road

Posted: 11/16/2012 10:46:58 PM
I wish I did...but I will say, I'm better than I used to be. Tonight was the first time in two years I've used a credit card to make a purchase...and it was only $30.00.

I still spend. Not as much and at least I'm not charging it, so things like Ipads are a lot harder for me to justify than they used to be.

But if you have the money and don't often treat yourself, I say get it.


~Kristen~

jgpea
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 378,405
June 2008
Posts: 2,152
Layouts: 9

Posted: 11/16/2012 11:04:15 PM
We DO NOT have a hard time spending money.

Got the credit card bills to show for it!

(TRYING to do better)

Treat yourself every now & then, it won't be the end of the world. Like anything else jn life, moderation is the key.
Uploaded with iPhone client

azredhead34
peaintheheat

PeaNut 2,698
February 2000
Posts: 28,190
Layouts: 272
Loc: Mesa, Arizona

Posted: 11/16/2012 11:08:59 PM
No you're not a lone. I also always think I can get it cheaper somewhere else. Especially if it's a big purchase item.
We're also trying to recover from tough financial spot. Things are stable and I don't want to go back to where were ever. It's still shaky but better. I have a hard time buying things that aren't on sale, unless we really need it.




AN
In Memoriam

PeaNut 236,442
December 2005
Posts: 15,972
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/16/2012 11:15:55 PM
I am not a spender by nature, but when I decide I want something - that's it, I'm getting it. Thank goodness I don't have a lot of wants!

That said, the thing that helps me make big purchases without feeling any guilt or regret over them is having the money earmarked for that. I do monthly budgeting, so if I put $100 in a clothes fund, or $1000 in a house decor fund, I don't feel an ounce bad spending that. If I haven't specifically made the decision and earmarked the money though, then I question it more.

Another thing I've heard others do is to set a specific timeline. If they see something and want it, they have a cooling off period of (1 day, 3 days, 1 week, 1 month, whatever). If they still really want it after that cooling off period, they get it without guilt.

Darkangel090260
PeaFixture

PeaNut 308,882
April 2007
Posts: 3,515
Layouts: 15

Posted: 11/17/2012 2:35:22 AM
Yes, I am looking a new pair of work out shoes, They are 18.00 and I have been putting it off. I get what is need and that's it.


I have quite a few learing disabilitys that effect my spelling a grammer. I do know my grammer and spelling suck. I have been working on this problem all my adult life.

miss_lizzie
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 229,470
October 2005
Posts: 2,143
Layouts: 0
Loc: My DH's heart

Posted: 11/17/2012 4:45:39 AM
I have a hard time spending on myself too. Spend on others? No problem, but it's so hard to spend on myself. Honestly, I think it's because I don't think I'm worth it. My DH is so supportive, though. If he knows I really want something--and it's not going to affect our financial lives--he buys it for me and tells me I deserve it. I love that man.

GrinningCat
Proudly Canadian

PeaNut 43,061
July 2002
Posts: 33,591
Layouts: 2

Posted: 11/17/2012 4:58:19 AM
No, I don't have a hard time spending money. Honestly, you wanted the iPad, you ordered it and now you've made yourself miserable because you cancelled the order. You say you can afford it, so why are you denying yourself? What's wrong with spending money on yourself? What's holding you back?

This topic is spoken of a lot on this board, and I don't get it. Sometimes (and I'm not saying you are doing this) it seems there is a bit of a martyr complex attached to it or that it's some kind of accomplishment by not spending money. As if some people are saying, "look how amazing and wonderful I am because I deny myself things all the time and don't spend money". But what have you really accomplished?

Cheap and excessively frugal people frustrate me. What's the point of having money available if you don't spend it?

SinCity2003
PeaNut

PeaNut 519,832
September 2011
Posts: 422
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/17/2012 6:05:54 AM
I wrote your same post almost 2 months ago. I earned bonus money and had put it aside for an iPad, but just couldn't make myself buy it. Those who responded told me to buy it and I did. I don't regret it for one second. I love, love, love my iPad.
However, I know exactly where you're coming from. We took a major financial hit in '08 and i'm fiercely protective of our money because of it.
Buy it, enjoy it!!!
Uploaded with iPhone client

petesmom
Tragically Flip

PeaNut 141,872
April 2004
Posts: 6,363
Layouts: 0
Loc: midwest

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:04:05 AM
*snort* I wish.

backtoscrap
PeaAddict

PeaNut 185,436
January 2005
Posts: 1,115
Layouts: 0
Loc: Southeastern MI

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:07:11 AM
I have a very hard time spending money on anything, it stems from my DH being laid off for over a year and struggling. We depleted our savings to keep up with the bills. He has been back to work for over 2 years now and my savings is larger than it has ever been, yet i still cringe at the thought of spending money. I am currently redecorating my living room and I did actually buy new carpet and furniture, it is however stressing me out LOL. I'd like new artwork for the walls next, not sure if I can do it.

IleneTell
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 434,842
August 2009
Posts: 2,838
Layouts: 654

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:29:49 AM
I tend to be frugal for the most part. Maybe it would help to buy it as a gift for yourself? You deserve a gift for the holidays too, so maybe this year it will be an iPad



pheestand
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 6,487
September 2000
Posts: 5,895
Layouts: 16
Loc: Livonia, MI USA

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:38:36 AM

I don't see the point in replacing it since it works fine.


This is me. I hate shopping/spending- ESPECIALLY when something still serves its purpose well. When i have a hole in my jeans, I buy another pair of jeans. Have a rip in that shirt? I'll look for another one. When the kids need clothes because they've outgrown them, then I have no problem shopping.

Right now my daughter wants to upgrade her phone from an Optimus S to a Galaxy. Why? Because her little 14 yr old friends all have iPhones. I ask her what their phone can do that hers can't. She can't answer. A phone - a device from which you can contact other people. She can call, text, email, take photos, play games, etc... The phone will cost a whopping $50, and because we have an old contract, upgrading phones means another $10 per month for 2 years. I just feel like rolling down the car window and tossing $300 out the window; to me, same end result.

UGH- I hate feeling like this sometimes. DH and I work hard, we spend wisely, and have a bank balance to show it. We aren't living in a box without the comforts of a decent life, yet we're not replacing iPhones every time someone sneezes either. I want to have children that don't have an appreciation for what they DO have; I hate entitled children (especially when most of them grow up to become entitled adults).


pheestand
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 6,487
September 2000
Posts: 5,895
Layouts: 16
Loc: Livonia, MI USA

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:38:38 AM

I don't see the point in replacing it since it works fine.


This is me. I hate shopping/spending- ESPECIALLY when something still serves its purpose well. When i have a hole in my jeans, I buy another pair of jeans. Have a rip in that shirt? I'll look for another one. When the kids need clothes because they've outgrown them, then I have no problem shopping.

Right now my daughter wants to upgrade her phone from an Optimus S to a Galaxy. Why? Because her little 14 yr old friends all have iPhones. I ask her what their phone can do that hers can't. She can't answer. A phone - a device from which you can contact other people. She can call, text, email, take photos, play games, etc... The phone will cost a whopping $50, and because we have an old contract, upgrading phones means another $10 per month for 2 years. I just feel like rolling down the car window and tossing $300 out the window; to me, same end result.

UGH- I hate feeling like this sometimes. DH and I work hard, we spend wisely, and have a bank balance to show it. We aren't living in a box without the comforts of a decent life, yet we're not replacing iPhones every time someone sneezes either. I want to have children that don't have an appreciation for what they DO have; I hate entitled children (especially when most of them grow up to become entitled adults).


Duchess of Stuff
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 449,226
December 2009
Posts: 2,562
Layouts: 0
Loc: Pea-get Sound

Posted: 11/17/2012 7:40:14 AM
Yes I do. If it is not at least 50% off it ain't happening

Wait for a sale and then go for it


~ "full price is a F-word" ~

Scraptologist
Princess Pinkness

PeaNut 2,163
December 1999
Posts: 9,777
Layouts: 76
Loc: I'm So Canadian Even My Blood Cells are Red and White

Posted: 11/17/2012 8:05:55 AM
I have a slush fund that I've managed to stash away a significant amount of money into...we usually use it for Christmas and vacation. But over the last couple years, I've been very reluctant to use it for that. I love watching it grow. So I kind of get it!

none2pleased
PeaAddict

PeaNut 250,729
February 2006
Posts: 1,301
Layouts: 0
Loc: Cruisin to anywhere but here

Posted: 11/17/2012 8:30:46 AM
I was that way before. Now I dont feel I spend too much, but I do not deprive myself of something that I really want. We spend a lot of our money on vacations and small trips now, which is something we did not do in the past. I posted on another thread that dh and I have decided that we do not want to wait until the "right time" to travel because that time may not ever get here.

With that said, I still have the original envy phone. I refuse to get another because mine works perfectly fine. I would be perfectly happy with old tv's computers etc because that is not what "I" want so I think that it is all relative for each person. Travelling and apparently makeup are my downfalls





Bumpsy
PeaAddict

PeaNut 494,958
January 2011
Posts: 1,303
Layouts: 8
Loc: Cork Ireland

Posted: 11/17/2012 8:35:44 AM
Not in the slightest no.
As long as the basics are covered I see nothing wrong with spending the 'spare' money on things I want and will bring me enjoyment. Life's too short to go without if you don't need to and let's face it you can't take it with you.
I see no purpose in hoarding money and watching it grow, what are you 'growing' it for?


I would go out tonight but I haven't got a stitch to wear.

JRussell
Peas and Harmony

PeaNut 26,719
January 2002
Posts: 9,592
Layouts: 58
Loc: Pond Inlet

Posted: 11/17/2012 9:13:16 AM
I like to watch money grow too However, I do have an iPad. I love it.

It's all about balance. I know that I want a new camera lens in the spring and we are taking a long summer vacation so I have to save and budget or it won't happen.

There is nothing wrong with being a frugal saver. Sounds very smart and wise to me. Just plan your treats

Btw, we got rid of our fat tv 2 years ago and still have one in our bedroom that 'could' be replaced but it works just fine


Uploaded with iPhone client

*Delphinium Twinkle*
I'm just a pea:)

PeaNut 163,613
August 2004
Posts: 78,773
Layouts: 236
Loc: *Sunny Southern California*

Posted: 11/17/2012 9:14:48 AM
"Yes I do. If it is not at least 50% off it ain't happening

Wait for a sale and then go for it"


That's how I am too


Bethie
proud Fiskateer #269
{My Blog}
*My Scraproom*
Uploaded with iPhone client

Ms. GreenGenes
AncestralPea

PeaNut 140,500
April 2004
Posts: 4,365
Layouts: 44
Loc: Just this side of crazy!

Posted: 11/17/2012 9:19:33 AM
I grew up in a very frugal household, mainly because we were a family of 7 living on commission-based income.

Once I got older and had my own money, the freedom was amazing. Once I married DH, who made good money and loved technology, I was hooked and we spent a LOT.

Now, we have learned to reign in our spending (four kids will teach you that quickly! ). Our iPad is a first gen, and we will not get another till it dies. That said, it has been an EXCELLENT investment, and has come in handy so.many.times. It has paid for itself many times over. The whole family uses it, and loves it, right down to my three year old.

A good splurge now and then is worth it, IMO, as long as it's a long term investment.


~ Tracey
Uploaded with iPhone client

Captain K
AncestralPea

PeaNut 247,594
February 2006
Posts: 4,495
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/17/2012 10:05:44 AM

That said, it has been an EXCELLENT investment, and has come in handy so.many.times. It has paid for itself many times over. The whole family uses it, and loves it, right down to my three year old.

A good splurge now and then is worth it, IMO, as long as it's a long term investment.


I believe the word you are looking for is "purchase." An iPad is NOT an investment, not matter how you want to justify it. It can be a great purchase, and totally justified, but calling it an investment - twice - is ridiculous.

I wasn't going to say anything when I read your first use of the word investment, because I know people use that word casually to say it has "paid off" for them, but then you said "long term investment" and that is just crazy. It is a PURCHASE.

sunluver
PeaAddict

PeaNut 387,904
August 2008
Posts: 1,953
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/17/2012 10:44:34 AM
I have a hard time spending on "want" items rather than "need" items. I'll always remember what my Dad taught me. Before you buy something you want, think about how many hours of work it will take you to pay for it. This simple statement makes me stop and think before I buy that "want" item.

Ms. GreenGenes
AncestralPea

PeaNut 140,500
April 2004
Posts: 4,365
Layouts: 44
Loc: Just this side of crazy!

Posted: 11/17/2012 11:43:18 AM
Captain K, I will not split hairs with you.

Have your opinion.

I'll have mine.

We bought it for a purpose, to use when DD had her last surgery. We took it to give her something to take her mind off the pain and discomfort.

We later used it for educational purposes with all our kids, on the advice of a tutor friend who gave us some tips on some good apps for that purpose.

I consider that an investment.

Whatever you think of my word choice is irrelevant to me.


~ Tracey
Uploaded with iPhone client

jarmommy
AncestralPea

PeaNut 359,731
January 2008
Posts: 4,907
Layouts: 1

Posted: 11/17/2012 12:53:46 PM
I'm the same way, I'm ok splurging on small purchases but big ones make me sweat. I've passed up buying an iPad more times than I can count, last nite I finally did it. Let me just say, I love the darn thing and wish I would've done it sooner. I know we will all use it and anything that helps the kids in school no matter how small is worth it. I absolutely LOVE my iPad.

ebarb63
BucketHead

PeaNut 372,904
April 2008
Posts: 902
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/17/2012 8:59:59 PM
I'm doing the same thing with my frig. This old clunker is over 20 years old. I know that it is going to just stop functioning one of these fine days. I keep a thermomator in there to make sure it is safe. But just seems dumb to me to buy another when this one is working fine. I tell myself "It just has to keep stuff frozen and cold". I have had the $ saved for a new one for three years so it's not like I can't afford a new one.
Show/Hide Icons . Show/Hide Signatures
Hide
{{ title }}
{{ icon }}
{{ body }}
{{ footer }}