Update...OMG.... my friend went to get a massage and told her she was too fat

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Posted 1/21/2013 by WorkingClassDog in NSBR Board
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justalittletike
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Posted: 1/22/2013 2:53:30 PM
when I say media is one sided... I mean news TV media and how it is aired... they pick one or the other.

not the response of either party.



not2peased
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Posted: 1/22/2013 2:54:46 PM

How on earth could this person have known who it was on the other end of the phone? Do some places have special TV phones or something? Cause it that's true, then my city is much farther behind than I originally thought. I imagine any massage place probably gets calls similar to this all the time. How are they supposed to make the connection?


LOL, no kidding. or maybe they should have said-"hey are you the woman that ran out of here crying earlier?"

c'mon-a grownup would take a deep breath and say, "look, I was in there earlier today and was told I was too big for your table. I wanted to find out how big someone has to be and now that you've told me, I know I am not too large. the person's comments really upset me and I am giving you an opportunity to make it right" "I'd like to speak to the owner"

if at that point, they blow it-then facebook to your heart's content.


-Kerry


Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others.

Darcy_Collins
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Posted: 1/22/2013 2:55:55 PM

however, do we know that the OP, or her aggrieved friend actually recruited people to go trash this business?


Well 4 yelp reviews showed up today with one star citing the same incident. If she's not "recruiting", it sure looks like it.




WorkingClassDog
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Posted: 1/22/2013 3:19:08 PM
Well some are going to disagree or agree no matter what.. we call can say we agree to disagree... so it's said and done and put out there. Will watch tonight and see how it plays out.



lucyg819
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Posted: 1/22/2013 3:27:01 PM
Please post a link to the story after it airs, if it's online. The rest of us will be dying to see how it's reported.


LUCYG
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redboots
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Posted: 1/22/2013 3:41:50 PM

Well some are going to disagree or agree no matter what.. we call can say we agree to disagree... so it's said and done and put out there. Will watch tonight and see how it plays out.


Well, I certainly hope that the truth does come out. I also hope that no one decides to trash a business you're affiliated because they heard something unfavorable from someone who heard it from someone else.

I find it really disheartening that you and your friend's family and loved ones have had no problem publicly trashing a business that none of you have ever patronized. You have all behaved just as poorly as the business owner was purported to have behaved.


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Posted: 1/22/2013 4:45:34 PM

I find it really disheartening that you and your friend's family and loved ones have had no problem publicly trashing a business that none of you have ever patronized. You have all behaved just as poorly as the business owner was purported to have behaved.


I agree with this. I also think a whole lot may have been lost in translation, a sort of telephone game, if you will.

I think there is her side, their side, and the truth, and I believe she may be hypersensitive about her weight.


----Theresa

WorkingClassDog
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Posted: 1/22/2013 5:10:38 PM

I find it really disheartening that you and your friend's family and loved ones have had no problem publicly trashing a business that none of you have ever patronized. You have all behaved just as poorly as the business owner was purported to have behaved.


And I on the other hand find it disheartening that the business owner behaved the way she did. She called her fat. That isn't how to run a business.

Edited to add:


and I believe she may be hypersensitive about her weight.


No I don't think someone calling you fat to your face is being hypersensitive.. Just like if someone called you ugly or skinny. It doesn't make you feel good. It's putting someone down.



gar
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Posted: 1/22/2013 5:19:17 PM

I find it really disheartening that you and your friend's family and loved ones have had no problem publicly trashing a business that none of you have ever patronized. You have all behaved just as poorly as the business owner was purported to have behaved.


And I on the other hand find it disheartening that the business owner behaved the way she did. She called her fat. That isn't how to run a business.


I don't think anyone is disagreeing with that. But that incident happened between two people. If your friend's friends and relatives then choose not to frequent that salon - fine, but to publicly trash it is something else. Of course you believe her but no doubt the salon owner has people who would believe her too.




Today, I will be colouring outside the lines.


Enough
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Posted: 1/22/2013 5:21:50 PM

The people who are trying to damage a business's reputation based on a third hand account and without hearing the other side of the story, should stop and think a minute. What if it was your business and the Peas were attacking your reputation without knowing ALL the facts. Because face it, you don't.



So if your friend says xxx Restaurant has crappy food don't eat there. You wouldn't believe her? You would go there and try it for yourself? When my friend says she got crappy service at xxx massage, would I go find out for myself? Nope I would take her word on it. That's what friends do.



The person who experienced the bad service has every right to shout it from the rooftops, discuss it on Facebook, tell the Peas about it, call the media, tell everyone she knows until her dying day. Nobody would blame her. And anyone who hears about it has every right to decide from what they heard not to patronize that business. Nobody would blame them.

What I have a problem with is all the people here ruining the reputation of the business on their business page based on 3rd party info. They are giving reviews they have no right to give. Reviews they don't have the knowledge to give.

lucyg819
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Posted: 1/22/2013 5:23:48 PM

What I have a problem with is all the people here ruining the reputation of the business on their business page based on 3rd party info. They are giving reviews they have no right to give. Reviews they don't have the knowledge to give.

I don't think anyone is defending that kind of behavior, and do we know for sure that any peas have done that? I haven't seen anyone admit to it.


LUCYG
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Susie Pea
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Posted: 1/22/2013 5:26:22 PM

I find it really disheartening that you and your friend's family and loved ones have had no problem publicly trashing a business that none of you have ever patronized.


But wait, what about the peas and Donna Downey?


redboots
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Posted: 1/22/2013 6:10:15 PM

I don't think anyone is defending that kind of behavior, and do we know for sure that any peas have done that? I haven't seen anyone admit to it.


Whether it's a pea doing the trashing or not is irrelevant, IMO.

The point is that people who have never patronized this business are leaving reviews all over the place that they have no right to leave (Facebook and Yelp).

As I stated before, I believe that paying customers have every right to their opinion of a business and to make that opinion public. The woman in question who was supposedly insulted had every right to air her grievances.

But for rabid family and friends to leave negative reviews of a business they have never patronized is galling, IMO.

Also, the lady who started this whole thing never came out and said exactly what she was told by the owner. For all we know, she was told they were unable to accomodate her size, which is very different from calling her fat and telling her they wouldn't give her a massage. From what she said, I gather that she never bothered to explain who she was over the phone, either. Just assumed that the person taking the call would know it was her.

If it comes out that the owner told her, "you are too fat for us to serve," then I will absolutely agree that the OP's friend has a right to trash this business' reputation. (Though I'm sure armywife would have been equally upset if they'd have taken her and she'd have broken a table. Then the issue would be that they didn't tell her and humiliated her that way.)

In any case, bad service to one person doesn't give everyone that person knows the right to publicly trash a business. If you haven't spent money there or had direct experience as a customer there, your opinion is worthless and should be kept private.

There is A LOT being lost in translation here, and people are working hard to ruin a business woman's reputation based on second and third hand information.

Aren't we always saying we should wait for the facts before we make judgments? I think this is one case where it would have been prudent to do so.

redboots
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Posted: 1/22/2013 6:14:03 PM

But wait, what about the peas and Donna Downey?


There are many differences between the Donna Downey situation and this one, IMO.

The biggest being that there was actual proof of Donna Downey's mistreatment of an ill customer. That was not hearsay.

Secondly, many, if not most, of the people here who were offended by that situation WERE paying customers. We'd purchased Donna Downey's products or taken classes from her. I wasn't posting during that debacle, but I did lurk and I stopped buying her products immediately.

I'm all for the consumer speaking with their dollars, but in the case of the massage place, the people "speaking" haven't spent their dollars there and had no intention of doing so even before this issue came up.

It seems like a bunch of busybodies fighting a grown woman's battle for her, and none of them come off well, IMO.

luckywife
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Posted: 1/22/2013 11:54:13 PM
Has the spa owner contacted your friend yet? If she took down the FB page for the business, she must know it is causing a stir.


Mrs. Steven Rudy


I-95
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Posted: 1/23/2013 2:15:10 AM

Also, the lady who started this whole thing never came out and said exactly what she was told by the owner.


Actually, she did. She responded to that question back on p.2 under the Pea name ArmyWife0112.

pjaye
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Posted: 1/23/2013 4:15:36 AM
Armywife needs to take some time to read the "I'm scared and have my pouty pants on" thread.
Having cancer and your chemo not working is something to cry about.
Being fat and having someone call you fat isn't nice, but seriously it's not the end of the world and considering it is something she did to herself, no point boo-hooing about it when someone points it out.

Being fat is something within her control, having cancer isn't.
Someone needs to get some serious life perspective - go and volunteer at a hospital, or an animal shelter THAT may give her something to cry legitimate tears over.
Otherwise she needs to stop feeling sorry for herself and do something active to fix the problem instead of blaming her issues on other people.

gar
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Posted: 1/23/2013 5:06:41 AM
You have a good point there.



Today, I will be colouring outside the lines.


I-95
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Posted: 1/23/2013 5:10:05 AM
C'mon Pjaye, we can always find someone who has troubles worse than our own, but it doesn't negate the issues that have a direct impact on our lives. That should be obvious by the number of PVM and prayer request posts we see here.

I hope, when you have hurt in your life, you have people around you who are empathetic. It doesn't make anyone feel better to be told to suck it up because someone else has worse things to deal with.

basketlacey
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Posted: 1/23/2013 7:30:24 AM
I'm really shocked at the overall "pea" reaction to this story. I am not sure you can equate this with getting bad service at a restaurant. If the owner of this business used the word "fat" when addressing this customer, its unexcusable. Fat, really???

What if when I sat down to order Mexican food Sunday, what if my waitress said, "Oh no, you shouldn't order that item, you are too fat already. Why don't you order from the skinny menu over here?" Or walked into a cosmetic store and was told, "You're really too ugly for us to help you look better." I wouldn't expect strangers to come to my defense. But you better believe my friends and family would be livid (as would I if this happened to my friend).

I can't even imagine a situation where this is even reasonably acceptable. If the owner was having a bad day and lost her head for a second, she should have been bending over backwards to make it right. This is way beyond poor customer service.

OP's friend - I am very sorry this happened to you. I can't even imagine how you must have felt when leaving the store.



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Dalai Mama
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Posted: 1/23/2013 7:37:56 AM

I can't even imagine a situation where this is even reasonably acceptable.
I don't think anyone is arguing that it's acceptable.


Jo Mama

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basketlacey
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Posted: 1/23/2013 7:45:39 AM

I don't think anyone is arguing that it's acceptable.


You're right. Most people aren't saying that. I was reacting to posts like - she is hypersensitive about her weight and being fat is in her control so she needs to go fix it.

Admittedly, that isn't the majority of the posters here.



Basketlacey
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doesitmatter?
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:37:08 AM
Wow_ this quickly spiraled put of control. Shocking


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Jillsie Pea
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:10:08 AM
I'm still curious to know what exactly was said to her. If someone called me fat, I would be quoting word for word.

And again, I agree with Pjaye here.


redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:03:33 AM

What if when I sat down to order Mexican food Sunday, what if my waitress said, "Oh no, you shouldn't order that item, you are too fat already. Why don't you order from the skinny menu over here?" Or walked into a cosmetic store and was told, "You're really too ugly for us to help you look better." I wouldn't expect strangers to come to my defense. But you better believe my friends and family would be livid (as would I if this happened to my friend).


You are comparing apples and oranges.

I know I-95 is saying the offended party told us exactly what was said to her, but I disagree. It seems that Armywife deleted the post in which she claimed to quote the owner verbatim. Interesting, don't you think?

The bottom line is that she was not refused service on the basis of her weight. She was told that their facility could not accommodate her weight. There is a huge difference between 'we don't serve fat people' and 'you are too large for us to accommodate.'

The first statement implies judgment and the second is a statement of fact.

The fact that Army wife says she is nowhere near 400 lbs. is irrelevant unless she shared that with the person with whom she had this conversation. Weight is difficult to gauge.

Also, workingclassdog, I would hope that the news would find a shooting more worthy of coverage than someone's hurt feelings.

shannoninkc
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:29:58 AM
If I was Armywife, I would have deleted it too, and not come back to read such things like, "do something about your weight"....or "people have cancer, get over it".

Seems like she is no? Did a 1/2 marathon?

redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:34:30 AM
Also, I was wrong about her deleting her post.

Sorry - I looked for her post several times but was on my phone and obviously missed it.

lucyg819
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:34:46 AM

C'mon Pjaye, we can always find someone who has troubles worse than our own, but it doesn't negate the issues that have a direct impact on our lives. That should be obvious by the number of PVM and prayer request posts we see here.

I hope, when you have hurt in your life, you have people around you who are empathetic. It doesn't make anyone feel better to be told to suck it up because someone else has worse things to deal with.

You are far, FAR more polite than I could trust myself to be.

I will limit myself to saying that if all pjaye has to contribute to the discussion is that no one should complain about anything unless they are fighting a deadly cancer, she should just stay out of the thread completely.


LUCYG
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--Bertrand Russell



dawndoll
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:35:20 AM

But the blatant attempts to destroy a person's business in the media is just disgusting and livelihood is disgusting.



In today's world, businesses DO depend upon social media quite a bit, as a rule. Bad feedback happens to spread as fast or faster than good. Just a fact. Those in the service industry best be serving people properly if they know what is good for their business reputation. If they feel it is okay to destroy someone's feelings for being overweight, then they should not be surprised when the tables are turned.

As for giving them a 'chance to make it better', they surely had that chance immediately as the incident occurred. If they value their business and are smart, they would have AT THAT TIME put on their thinking caps and found a solution. Instead, they mistakenly decided that it was okay to isolate this one customer. Bad mistake, as has been shown here. A person leaving in tears makes it pretty obvious that you need to do some damage control, right then. Waiting until a sh*tstorm erupts is not smart businesswise. I can't believe that some of you think she should have argued or tried to beg them to reconsider. How relaxing would THAT massage be when she knew full well that the person has an attitude about her?
I have been morbidly obese, normal weight and everything in-between, so I am no stranger to fat intolerance in the general public. However, if a business establishment in the service industry (especially one whose goal is to make people 'feel better') had ever treated me that way, I would surely make a very public announcement, and I know my friends would voice their disgust as well. As they should. If that establishment doesn't care, then they should advertise "We serve those only #XXX or lighter." Would they do that? Of course not. Why? Because it would isolate a lot of people, and not only those who are actually over that weight limit. Others would be appalled at that and that would be bad for business. Word of mouth travels fast especially when it is negative. Any smart business owner knows this.

To be fair, I am very interested in what the business has to say about the issue. If the account is true, then they deserve to lose business for treating people shoddily. Imagine if they had said, "Your skin is too dark..." Oh, but that's right, fat intolerance is still an accepted prejudice.




redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:40:33 AM

Imagine if they had said, "Your skin is too dark..." Oh, but that's right, fat intolerance is still an accepted prejudice.


I'm sorry, but being fat is NOT like skin color or sexual orientation. It is not a disability, either. This statement is ridiculous and insulting to people who deal with prejudice based on things THEY CANNOT CHANGE.

A business being unable to accommodate a person of substantial size does NOT mean they are discriminatory. It means that they are unable (or unwilling, which is their right) to serve a segment of society that is outside the average.

In this case, the massage therapist did not believe that her table could accommodate Armywife's weight. Her table would be able to accommodate most of the general population. I do not believe that business owners should be required to incur extra expense to accommodate someone's weight.

redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:44:20 AM
I don't understand this idea that it's okay for completely uninvolved parties to trash a business publicly because they know someone who had a bad experience there.

Armywife can complain all she wants. She went there with the intention of being a paying customer and was not satisfied with the treatment she received.

If you've never spent a dime at an establishment and never had any intention to, your opinion on their services or establishment is completely worthless. You're going off of hearsay (100% in this instance) and putting someone's livelihood at risk because someone you know had a bad experience there.


dawndoll
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:57:01 AM

I don't understand this idea that it's okay for completely uninvolved parties to trash a business publicly because they know someone who had a bad experience there.


Right or wrong, that is the way it is these days. Media is media. Business people need to do all they can these days to keep ahead of the competition, which includes watching how they conduct themselves with the customers that do enter their establishment.
If "Susie" went to a local restaurant and saw a dead mouse in a trap, watched the food prep person pick it up and go back to food prep without washing their hands, do you think she would not tell people? Do you think others would avoid that restaurant for the poor hygiene practices? It goes to show the mindset and practices of the establishment.
I know we can think of another popular chain restaurant that people refuse to patronize because of their stance on a certain social issue. This isn't really much different.





redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:59:44 AM

Right or wrong, that is the way it is these days.


Wow. Well, right or wrong, lots of people "discriminate" against fat people, as you say.

It is the way the world is.

dawndoll
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Posted: 1/23/2013 11:13:36 AM
Yes, that is very true.
Smart businesses don't though.
We have seen here from multiple thoughtful massage therapists that every effort is taken to accommodate a client.
I haven't seen one of them say, "I'd just tell her she is too fat and let her leave here crying."
Being in business for myself, I do whatever I can to retain customers and have them spread good words about me and my business. If someone is unhappy I do what I can to correct the situation. I know there is a lot of competition out there and one bad move on my part can be destructive.




redboots
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Posted: 1/23/2013 11:18:40 AM

Being in business for myself, I do whatever I can to retain customers and have them spread good words about me and my business. If someone is unhappy I do what I can to correct the situation. I know there is a lot of competition out there and one bad move on my part can be destructive.


I am also self-employed, which is, perhaps, why I find the "reviews" from people who never patronized this business so troubling.

Word of mouth is my best advertising and I strive to keep my clients happy.

They key word here is "clients," though. The vast majority of the people trashing this business had never spent a dime there, and had no intention of doing so. It's one thing to decide not to patronize an establishment based on word of mouth. It's another matter entirely to go out of your way to trash a place you've never been to.

I have no problem with Armywife complaining about the business on Yelp, Facebook or any other avenue she deems necessary. But having her mommy and friends trash the place in those same venues is wrong, IMO, unless those people also received poor treatment at the spa in question.

KRC11
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Posted: 1/23/2013 12:47:40 PM
Just checking in for an update. I googled and did not find any news related hits for this center. All I found was the website and yelp reviews. The yelp reviews posted by one person says "Laura's review" was censored. Is that possible? And why would the other three remain by people who weren't even "Laura".



KRC11

WorkingClassDog
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Posted: 1/23/2013 12:47:53 PM
Just wanted to come back and say, there are no new updates and when/if Channel 31 is going to reschedule the interview. They were on the way to the business yesterday afternoon (we believe) but not sure if they even got there when they had to go to some other story. A shooting I believe.



Enough
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Posted: 1/23/2013 1:47:22 PM

Do you think others would avoid that restaurant for the poor hygiene practices?

Avoiding the business based on what you hear is understandable. Trashing the business on their business page based on an experience you don't even know actually happened, is just as disgusting as being called fat. Actually worse, because you are damaging their livelihood based on what could be a misunderstanding, or even an out right lie. (as far as anyone here knows)

shannoninkc
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Posted: 1/23/2013 2:52:27 PM
Okay, so based on the opinions stated in this thread, only armywife is allowed to complain. Anyone else cannot have an issue, unless they have the same experience?

So those "dirty diner" clips on the news, those are reported on because someone turns them in for dirty practices, etc. and the news crew shows up and asks them about their dirty establishment, and the whole city learns about it on tv. Isn't that sorta how that works?

I guess this is completely out of line, right? They just trashed an eatery based on what someone else has reported.

It would only be fair if *I* was in the McDonalds (or wherever) and an actual rat ran over MY foot. My friends foot? Why, I guess I better not complain! That would be cruel!

not2peased
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Posted: 1/23/2013 2:59:06 PM

Okay, so based on the opinions stated in this thread, only armywife is allowed to complain. Anyone else cannot have an issue, unless they have the same experience?

So those "dirty diner" clips on the news, those are reported on because someone turns them in for dirty practices, etc. and the news crew shows up and asks them about their dirty establishment, and the whole city learns about it on tv. Isn't that sorta how that works?

I guess this is completely out of line, right? They just trashed an eatery based on what someone else has reported.

It would only be fair if *I* was in the McDonalds (or wherever) and an actual rat ran over MY foot. My friends foot? Why, I guess I better not complain! That would be cruel!



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your arguments are absurd

I can't believe grown adults think this behavior is ok



-Kerry


Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others.

redboots
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:20:24 PM

Okay, so based on the opinions stated in this thread, only armywife is allowed to complain. Anyone else cannot have an issue, unless they have the same experience?

So those "dirty diner" clips on the news, those are reported on because someone turns them in for dirty practices, etc. and the news crew shows up and asks them about their dirty establishment, and the whole city learns about it on tv. Isn't that sorta how that works?

I guess this is completely out of line, right? They just trashed an eatery based on what someone else has reported.

It would only be fair if *I* was in the McDonalds (or wherever) and an actual rat ran over MY foot. My friends foot? Why, I guess I better not complain! That would be cruel!


Shannon, I want to preface my comments by saying that I always enjoy the humor in your posts. You often point out the absurdity that exists here and make me laugh.

I don't think you're seeing the issue from the other side, however.

First of all, NONE of the Armywife's accusations have been proven. A news report about a "dirty diner" would actually attempt to provide both sides of the story. All we've heard is what Armywife and her mob of supporters are claiming occurred.

Secondly, no one has said that Armywife had no right to complain via whatever avenues she deemed fit. She was attempting to be a paying customer of this business and was unhappy with the way they treated her. That's exactly why sites like Yelp exist.

What I have a problem with is all of these people who have never been to this massage center and whom had ZERO intention of patronizing the establishment prior to this drama going out of their way to trash a business they have not patronized personally. And over a situation they did NOT personally witness.

I've had bad experiences at plenty of places that I wouldn't recommend again. I have left negative Yelp reviews for a few of them. Conversely, I have avoided places with bad word of mouth. My friend and I were discussing a new Thai restaurant and she said the food was awful. I decided not to to eat there, but I did NOT leave a review based on my friend's bad experience.

Reviews are supposed to be left to people who have actually patronized a certain establishment, not to people who've heard bad things second, third and fourth hand.

Enough
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:25:28 PM

They just trashed an eatery based on what someone else has reported.


If a reporter is reporting on it, I expect he has looked into it and seen for himself that it is in fact a dirty diner.
I highly doubt even one person that trashed the massage business on their business page, has contacted the owner to get her side of the story and verified that it did in fact happen the way armywife said it did.

Annabella
Leads a Charmed Life

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:27:05 PM

Okay, so based on the opinions stated in this thread, only armywife is allowed to complain. Anyone else cannot have an issue, unless they have the same experience?




On yelp, only first hand accounts should be posted. On facebook, her friends can harass the business owner, but it's linked to your name, shows up in your friends newsfeed, I personally think it only makes you look bad to be attacking someone.

This reminds me of that newscaster who had a viewer write in to say she might want to lose some weight if she's going to be on TV. I can't remember his exact words but I thought it wasn't that bad when I looked it up. However the suggestion of it threw her over the edge, never mind that she indeed was over her BMI, and she basically held a press conference on the news to say how horrible his comments were and blamed her medical problems for preventing her from losing any weight.

But you know at the end of the day it's like flying SW airlines, if you're not going to fit in the seat they have to tell you to buy 2 and you can't get all huffy over it, some things are just fact. Newscasters are all lean and the guy who wrote her offered to help her lose weight so she can look her best in front of millions on TV. Sometimes you just have to throw opinions you don't like in the trash, no need to hold up a sign saying I'm fat and I'm proud.

The owner of the massage business does need to take the same sensitivity training class as SW employees in how to express her sentiments, but I feel that if you run home crying from such a remark, then yes you are indeed sensitive about your weight and need to explore why and what you can do about your weight, not attack the rude person who told you what you already know.

The other day I saw a woman who was very plus size (I have no idea what her weight was because I could never guess it) wearing light pink leggings with a shirt that stopped at her waist. Let me tell you, such leggings should be left for toddlers. But it told me one thing about her, she was proud to wear those leggings and would challenge anyone who dared say a word to her.

I once went to a bar after getting a spray tan and I guy offered to buy me a drink and halfway into the conversation he touches my forehead and says how shiny I am. Yes with that solution on my skin, it does come off easily and I really should have stayed home. But shoot I owned that I was shiny and proceeded to tell him how funny it is his name is Harry when he's bald. Throw one at me I'll throw one right back at you, and we continued to chat for a few more minutes pleasantly. I never let him know that remarked affected me any which way. Then I descretely grabbed a napkin to pat my forehead as I left because I got a text from other friends that they were at another bar, so I didn't want to show up looking like I rubbed baby oil on my face.

Once I read a comeback Rhianna had for someone who said she had a big forehead, she doesn't have to publically remark on things people say about her. My co-worker has a female black friend who refused to color her hair once she went gray until she went to Disneyworld with her family. And after her hair got wet in the rain it was such a mess, a kid yelled out "look there's Don King". The woman called my co-worker up and said she's now going to dye her hair because she can't have that happen to her again and they laughed over it.

These things happen to all of us, you have to change your reaction to it or get rid of the issue made fun of.




WorkingClassDog
Rick Springfield Junkie

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:31:11 PM

I don't think you're seeing the issue from the other side, however.

First of all, NONE of the Armywife's accusations have been proven. A news report about a "dirty diner" would actually attempt to provide both sides of the story. All we've heard is what Armywife and her mob of supporters are claiming occurred.



That can be said to just about anyone here claiming wrong doing. How is she supposed to have "proven" this? Record herself? People come on here all the time to complain about this, that and the other, but there is no proof, we have to believe what they say to an extent.

And to say "all we've hear is what Armywife and her mob are claiming".... I think mob is a little overboard.. her friends are not on here except for me. And the newsstation is (hopefully still) trying to get the owners point of view on this as stated above.

And it says miles to me that not once has the owner said a word or reached out to Armywife and shutting down her Facebook page. She could have issued a statement right on her page for the world to see. Something like "I am sorry for what happened and there was some misunderstandings and I would like to tell Armywife that I am sorry." Why couldn't the owner have done that???



Enough
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:36:57 PM
WorkingClassDog, the point is, at this time, no one BUT Armywife has the right to go on the massage business page to report and complain about what happened to Armywife.

not2peased
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:37:45 PM

And it says miles to me that not once has the owner said a word or reached out to Armywife and shutting down her Facebook page. She could have issued a statement right on her page for the world to see. Something like "I am sorry for what happened and there was some misunderstandings and I would like to tell Armywife that I am sorry." Why couldn't the owner have done that???


she may have been advised not to reach out. someone who would go to this extreme to ruin someone's business would probably try to sue said person also. saying your sorry-might be fueling the fire at this point and she may have been advised by legal counsel to keep her mouth shut the time for conversation was when army wife called the business not after she and her buddies torched the place

for army wife this was an experience that caused her to cry and have hurt feelings. for the business owner this could be the end of her livelihood and the beginning of complete financial ruin.


-Kerry


Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others.

redboots
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:45:11 PM

That can be said to just about anyone here claiming wrong doing. How is she supposed to have "proven" this? Record herself? People come on here all the time to complain about this, that and the other, but there is no proof, we have to believe what they say to an extent.

And to say "all we've hear is what Armywife and her mob are claiming".... I think mob is a little overboard.. her friends are not on here except for me. And the newsstation is (hopefully still) trying to get the owners point of view on this as stated above.

And it says miles to me that not once has the owner said a word or reached out to Armywife and shutting down her Facebook page. She could have issued a statement right on her page for the world to see. Something like "I am sorry for what happened and there was some misunderstandings and I would like to tell Armywife that I am sorry." Why couldn't the owner have done that???


For the umpteenth time, Armywife is free to claim whatever she wants. She actually patronized the business. She was there.

Those of you who left negative reviews on Yelp and on her Facebook page, however, had no right to do so. You were never a paying customer and you had no intention of being one even before this all went down. It's basically gossiping, IMO, and it's juvenile, unprofessional and vindictive.

Did your friend give the business owner the opportunity to respond? She admitted that she didn't identify herself when she called back after the incident and you said the business owner should have known who was calling. Do you realize how many calls the average business receives in a day? Do you really believe the person answering the phones (who may not have even been the person your friend dealt with) was supposed to magically guess who was calling and why? And then offer an apology based on the information she gleaned using her psychic powers?

I saw your friend's Facebook page, and the truth is that she is quite a large woman. The truth is that many massage tables may not be able to accommodate someone of her size. This is not discrimination, this is not being unkind, this is simple fact.

If, indeed, your friend was told "we do not serve fat people/you will break my table" then she has every right to report that and advise other people of size to avoid the humiliation she endured.

That does NOT give you, her mommy or anyone else she knows license to trash a business online on sites like Yelp. Why? Because YOU ARE NOT AND HAVE NOT EVER BEEN CUSTOMERS OF THIS ESTABLISHMENT.

I feel like you are being willfully dense here.

WorkingClassDog
Rick Springfield Junkie

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:48:43 PM
I trust my friend at what she said, bottom line.



redboots
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/23/2013 3:50:10 PM
Trust her all you want, but that still doesn't give you license to trash a business that you have never patronized.

Once again, you are ignoring the point of most of the posts here.

WorkingClassDog
Rick Springfield Junkie

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Posted: 1/23/2013 4:06:48 PM




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