Of course I think I really screwed up at work - help !

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Posted 1/23/2013 by Quinlove in NSBR Board
 

Quinlove
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:14:39 AM
Long story, please bear with me. In November I tripped and fell on my lunch hour at work. There is a fast food restuarant just about in our parking lot (JCPenney) and we all go there alot for lunch.

It was 6:30 (dark) and on my way back, I tripped over a grate and fell - broke my hand by putting my hand down on concrete. Somehow got back into work and they thought it would be workmans comp because I was on my lunch hour. It is not.

Surgery on my hand and off work for 3 weeks. My insurance at work only covers 80%. Surgery included a set of bars and pins (T bar?) and cost $$$. My son wanted me to see if the fast food rest. would cover my out of pocket expenses. Which are alot.

So, a few weeks ago, I meet the insurance guy from fast food rest. at the place in my work's parking lot. He recorded my statement and seemed to agree with me that it might not have been entirely my fault as there are big holes in parking lot where I fell.

Well - problem is - during this 20 minute meeting, my store manager came in and saw me in this meeting ! I completely forgot about her seeing me and since then she has treated me pretty bad. Work every weekend, etc. Maybe she thinks I was applying for a job or probably trying to sue fast food place - I am not. Just want medical bills that are not being paid, paid.

Do I talk to her about this ? explain it to her ? She probably thinks worse of me now. Which she never did before. Help please




~~ Marianne ~~


fishwitch
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:18:24 AM
Why would she think that you were applying for a job? Why couldn't it have just been a friend or something?



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Free~Bird
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:18:57 AM
I'd probably tell her, but I probably would have told her the moment she saw me. "Oh, hi Jane. This is Joe. He's with the insurance company for the restaurant from when I broke my hand. I'll be back at the office in just a bit."


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GrinningCat
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:20:30 AM
I'm not sure I understand why you think she thinks these things? It's really none of her business if you are trying to get your costs covered. And if she is treating you poorly over this, then she's a douche, plain and simple.

benem
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:25:55 AM
It's none of her business. If you think she is treating you badly you could try talking to her. But in my experience people who do that don't want to listen.


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kimberly38
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:26:37 AM
Your meeting with the insurance person was in the parking lot?

If so, this should have nothing whatsoever to do with your job. She does not know who you were meeting.

And who has ever had an interview in a parking lot?

I would approach your boss and ask her specifically as to why your work schedule has changed so drastically? Is there something you do not know about that you should be aware of? Is your performance off? What is her reasoning? Put the ball in her court. If she brings up the meeting, than you can tell her about it to a degree. If it does not involve your work, than, legally, it is none of her business.

You just say, "Oh that. That was an insurance person from the fast food restaurant regarding my injury in Nov." No one needs to know anytihng further.

Quinlove
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:28:30 AM
It seemed obvious that he was an insurance guy or atty. It was one of those situations where we both pretended not to notice the other. But she is pretty sharp and I figure she thinks it had to do with my hand.

I have never sued anyone in my life, not that I haven't had reasons to. We don't roll that way. By my son's prompting, I contacted fast food rest. and am trying to pursue that avenue.

Actually, I am only 99% sure that she saw me, and am worried about bringing it up, in the extreme small case that she did not. No, I am sure she did. I was right by the door off to the side alittle. And she lingured around getting salt and straws and such.... dang it.

I really should just go in and ask her if I have done something wrong at work - I have not. And see where it goes.





~~ Marianne ~~


Runner5
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:29:17 AM
If it were me (and I'm not the best at this kind of thing so take it with a grain of salt), I'd just go to my boss and say something like "Have I done anything to offend you or upset you? I'd like to clear the air."

If she tried to brush it off, I'd press it just a little saying "It seems like ever since you saw me in the parking lot speaking to the insurance rep from the restaurant where I broke my hand, things have been different."

Then I'd be quiet and wait to see what she says (and following her lead to either end the conversation or discuss things further). I'd also make sure all of my comments were made respectfully in a polite and engaging tone.

I tend to be direct and that hasn't always served me well. I just don't like to play games or walk on eggshells around people.


Mary




pretzels
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:41:21 AM
I'd just come out and say it: "I noticed you at blah, blah, blah, and I wanted to make it perfectly clear to you that blah, blah, blah." I don't think it hurts anything, and it clears the air. Maybe you're having to work lots of weekends to make up for the time you were off with your hand. I mean, others presumably had to work extra (or they hired temporary help) while you were off.

It's always better to be honest rather than sitting around wondering.

Quinlove
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:52:22 AM
I know I should talk to her. But - so many times I have apologized to her about something stupid I said or did - and she was unaware or pretended to not know what I was talking about, so I brought it up unnecessarily.

And - between the fall and the meeting at fast food place, I sent a letter to her boss, regional manager, how nice she and the other managers had treated me at work regarding time off from accident !! She had even offered to take me to surgery ! I had discussed this with the woman who does payroll and she thought that it would be very beneficial to the boss if I did this... I even included the payroll woman's name in e mail, since she played around with the pto hours a tiny bit.

I have never heard anything about doing this. Although the regional manager thanked me for the letter and said he would contact the appropriate people (my store manager,etc.) I do really try to always go out of my way to do the right thing and make people feel good about themselves.

So here I was thinking that my store manager would feel very good about me writing that praising letter to her boss - um... back fired kind of. And no, I did not do it for my own benefit. Seriously, I did not.




~~ Marianne ~~


I-95
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Posted: 1/23/2013 8:59:17 AM
I think you're worrying way too much. I probably wouldn't bring it up at all, but if the situation presents itself, casually mention that was the insurance guy, but she probably thought you were having a wild affair with someone and having a clandestine meeting in the parking lot

IleneTell
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:07:33 AM
You were outside in the parking lot, taking a break at work, and talked to a person....why would your manager think you were either applying for a job or trying to sue? You wouldn't have an interview in a parking lot. I'm not sure why she would possibly think any of those things.

Maybe she's treating you wrose for a different reason?

YOu could meet up with her and ask if everything is ok, that you want to make sure she's happy with your performance, etc - leave it pretty general and see what she says. If she does have an issue with you, it probably doesn't have anything to do with your parking lot meeting.



Annabella
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:16:18 AM
You're overthinking the letter. If she's treating you different now I would just walk into her office, close the door, and ask her why the change in temperment. Make no mention of her seeing you having a meeting in the parking lot.




Quinlove
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:21:44 AM
To clear things up - I was inside the fast food restuarant. Sitting at a table kind of near the door with a tape recorder going on the table. It was on my day off. She came in (figures) to get some food to go, which we almost always do, and saw me with him.

It was obvious that he was not someone who I was just having lunch with. And I am worried that she thinks I am trying to sue the resturant. I know, none of her business, but she has treated me badly ever since.

And, I also sent that praising letter just before this to her boss about her. I certainly couldn't bring that up if I talk to her - could/should I ??? I am just so upset about working every weekend when the other people in my dept get them off. Not that I don't mind taking my turn, but it just puts me in a bad mood that I am not being treated fairly.




~~ Marianne ~~


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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:24:03 AM
Maybe she thinks you're going to sue the company you work for?


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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:34:59 AM
Reading your updates, I now think you're worrying too much over this person.

If anything, she might have figured out why you were there (what difference does it make to her?). However, some ppl get really pissy over other ppl "suing" companies.

My husband had a work comp claim that went on for about 4 years with a former company. His new boss (and idiot and the owner of the company) basicalliy said that ppl that sue are pieces of shit.

Ironically, the new boss' wife had done just that when she fell someplace.

Later my husband got a double hernia working for that company and ended up off work for 8 weeks. Just glad it happened there and not here!


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scrappin jen
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:35:23 AM
I think you are overthinking it. You are probably working weekends because you had so much time off with your injury. While they were nice about it is does bump you down the list for the best days off for a bit would be my guess. While you were out the other workers had to fill in your piece so they are getting the reward for now. Not a big deal, but if it is bothering you-talk to her. It may seem odd to ask for more after you've been given much already in concessions.

To be honest though, I am not sure how falling on your own time ( during your break) is someone else's job to pay your medical bills though? Parking lots have holes, cracks, and uneven surfaces by nature. Meeting with their insurance people looking for a claim may be making you feel weird-as you said you are not sue happy. That maybe where your uneasiness is coming from?

divinghkns
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:36:08 AM

If it were me (and I'm not the best at this kind of thing so take it with a grain of salt), I'd just go to my boss and say something like "Have I done anything to offend you or upset you? I'd like to clear the air."

If she tried to brush it off, I'd press it just a little saying "It seems like ever since you saw me in the parking lot speaking to the insurance rep from the restaurant where I broke my hand, things have been different."

Then I'd be quiet and wait to see what she says (and following her lead to either end the conversation or discuss things further). I'd also make sure all of my comments were made respectfully in a polite and engaging tone.

I tend to be direct and that hasn't always served me well. I just don't like to play games or walk on eggshells around people.


I would go this route.

Actually, something similar to this happened to me and I handled it similarly to the suggestion I quoted. It's kind of a funny story now that it's a few years later...

I was married at the time, and I had set up one of my best girlfriends with a cute, nice, single engineer from work. They hit it off and dated for quite awhile and eventually got married. Well, shortly after they started dating, my birthday rolled around. And Erin (my girlfriend) thought it would be fun to decorate my desk. So she talked Bobby (the co-worker I set her up with) into coming in a bit early and decorating my desk. Well, something came up that morning with her daughter and she couldn't come in so Bobby said he'd handle it himself. Well, my boss caught him putting flowers, a card, a present and a cake on my desk. My boss didn't know Bobby was dating anyone, let alone my friend, so to him it looked like Bobby and I were having an affair.

Well, I guess Bobby realized it looked awkward and instead of explaining things, he just acted more awkward, left everything and left. So I get into work and my boss is acting super weird around me and I couldn't figure it out. I called Erin to thank her for all the stuff, and she started laughing and told me the whole story because Bobby had told her how awkward it all was. Well, then I was left in a predicament like you are...do I say something to my boss and risk him thinking I'm protesting too much or do I say something to clear the air? I waited for a while and towards the end of the day, I went into his office, and said I'm getting ready to head out, have a good night. He said "have plans for your birthday?" and then I was able to say "yeah, my hubby's going to take me out to dinner, but he's going to have to do really well to compete with the cake & flowers Erin sent over this morning." He looked confused and said "who's Erin" so then I was able to say, the girl I set Bobby up with and from there we were able to get it all out in the open. Things were fine after that.

So I guess I'm for that route, or the other gal who said to ask her why she's treating you differently w/o bringing up the incident. That let's her know that you are aware she is treating you differently, and give her a chance to respond.

Quinlove
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:40:08 AM
OMG Trollie - You might be right.

Today I am going to request a long weekend off in March to go to AZ to see my parents who will be visiting my sister. IF that gets denied (by her) then I will have to talk to her why I am being treated so badly. But, if it gets approved, I will let it go... sound like a plan ?

And, thanks so much peas... I really needed some outside help on this.




~~ Marianne ~~


Luvspaper
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Posted: 1/23/2013 9:57:58 AM
I agree with Scrappin Jen. I think you are way overthinking this. I would expect a worse schedule when coming back since others worked for you while you were gone. And the fact that they have redone the schedule since then and you weren't available. Hopefully the next time the schedule is redone, you will get better more favorable hours.

My only other question : was your leave covered under FMLA? If you were eligible, you pretty much have the right to be returned to an equivalent schedule.


obliolait
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Posted: 1/23/2013 10:02:01 AM
I'd think she would be extra nice to you if she thought you were going to sue

divinghkns
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Posted: 1/23/2013 1:19:41 PM
I was thinking about this more over lunch. Like Trollie said, she might think you are planning to sue your company, or she might be afraid that once the restaurant gets involved they/their insurance might come after your company for part of the claims. Whether they would have a valid argument or not probably depends on things we don't know from your post, but maybe she's just worried that even if you don't sue your company, the restaurant/insurance company might try to seek damages?


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valincal
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Posted: 1/23/2013 1:25:20 PM
Am I missing something? Why is it your store manager's concern where you are and what you are doing on your free time?






pennyring
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Posted: 1/23/2013 1:56:07 PM
I think this falls into one of two categories:

1. We always think everyone is looking at us, judging us, backstabbing us and doing stuff to us. In reality, they're in their own little world, thinking about their own issues. So what I'm saying is, the world doesn't revolve around you and you're just being paranoid.

or

2. Your boss is a controlling psycho. I've had controlling psycho bosses before, so I know what that's like.

Ultimately, unless she either confronts you or makes your life hell, I'd just ignore it and go about your business.

One question though: Are you always so paranoid in life, or is it just with this one person? That might lead to some answers right there.




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Posted: 1/23/2013 2:12:07 PM
The only thing you've mentioned as examples of her treating you badly is that you're working every weekend.

You're in retail and you were off for three weeks. I haven't heard anything which sounds like you're being mistreated.





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not2peased
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Posted: 1/23/2013 2:18:06 PM
I agree with Trollie


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