If someone called and said they were dropping by what would your reaction be? (house cleanliness)

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Posted 1/29/2013 by toaojs in NSBR Board
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moveablefeast
do justice, love mercy

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Posted: 1/29/2013 4:38:23 PM
"Come on by if you like. My place is an epic disaster - life's been like that lately."

My friends wre just in my epic disaster yesterday. I've been sick, had a sick kid, and am moving my niece into my house. Messes everywhere. Probably like yours. It's okay. Life is like that sometimes.

I'm catching up a little. It's just that I haven't been caught up since before Christmas. Sigh. Just trying to stay ahead of the filth, and dealing with the clutter and disorganization as i go. I got my flylady routine back up and running, which has helped immensely.

Besides, I have been in my friends' houses. There are about two people I know in the world who are qualified to judge my housekeeping abilities or lack thereof. And they are lovely people who don't care what my house looks like. Good friends don't judge yr house, or you for what it looks like.

angievp
Ideay pues?

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Posted: 1/29/2013 4:46:09 PM
Ok.

But I have a housekeeper. She cleans, mops, dusts daily. Weekends the only thing that gets cluttered is the kitchen.

writermom1
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Posted: 1/29/2013 4:51:27 PM

I appreciate a heads-up even though my house is pretty presentable 9/10 days. If someone is stopping by, I will use an antibacterial wipe on the bathroom surfaces, put out a fresh hand towel and check to see if there's a shoe mountain in the foyer.


Get out of my house!!! And shut the front door!

We have shoe mountain too. We can have a foot of snow on an 8 degree day and there will still be a mixture from flip-flops to Muck Boots.

OP if you have been sick no one should judge. Anything short of a child tied to a chair is a win in that book.




renee_elp
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/29/2013 4:58:25 PM
My house is never really clean ... I do the necessary to keep it habitable but it's a lost cost due to a sick husband and animals.

Everyone is warned and if they want to come in spite of that, well ... they know what to expect.

I'm with the other ladies ... plan A if someone HAS to come over, is do a quick run through and deal with the really new gross stuff if there is any and then spray febreze and get ready for offering snacks or drinks.

When it's been bad, I only offer a bottled drink, for example, so that I just give them the bottle ... that's how bad it is sometimes.

If its a BFF, they already know me and won't care (to my face).

Kiwi-Jo
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Posted: 1/29/2013 5:40:14 PM
I really don't get the idea that having piles of shoes, or the children's schoolwork, or a sink full of unwashed dishes mean a home isn't company-ready.

Thos things are the sign that family lives there. Sure, they are not acceptable in a show-home - but are your visitors coming to visit a family or a show home?

None of these sorts of things indicate dirtiness or a lack of hygeine.

Would your visitors truly be critical if they happen to see a pile of laundry waiting to be put away? Or a pile of dirty shoes by the door?
If so, I think that says more about them, than it does about you!




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guzismom
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Posted: 1/29/2013 5:44:40 PM
Honestly, my answer would be "come on over, I'm home".

My husband and kids are a great help with the housework, so I can't imagine my house EVER being in the condition the OP described, sick or not. I'm lucky, I guess!


Marilyn (now in New Mexico!!)
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maryannscraps
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

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Posted: 1/29/2013 5:55:11 PM
I'd say "come on over" except if I was sick. And then because I felt crappy, not because the house was a stye.

My house is lived in, and that's just the way it is. It's pretty clean -- I'm good about keeping up with bathrooms and the kitchen and laundry. But I'm sure there are papers floating around in odd places, and DH has a robotic project that's taken over the family room. And piles of library books all over the coffee table, a boy scout merit badge project is covering the kitchen table, and the dog is lying on the couch again... but that's my life (and just what I can see from my messy desk!)

I'd throw on a pot of coffee and put out some girl scout cookies and light the fire.

My MIL is the only one who would ever say anything and she lives 1500 miles away, so I get more notice than 5 minutes.

Maryland
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Posted: 1/29/2013 6:03:10 PM
Freak out?!! I have 3 girls, so it's always a mess - all their stuff.

myboysnme
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Posted: 1/29/2013 6:04:09 PM
I never want anyone over here; my house is always in disarray. Interestingly, my adult son's friends are always hanging out here; they say they feel comfortable here.

My other son doesn't like his friends to come over because he says our house is too messy compared to their houses.


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Posted: 1/29/2013 6:08:45 PM
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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 6:56:04 PM
Come on in! All I have to do is put a clean hand towel in the bathroom and pick up a few dog toys.


Twins Rock
PeaAddict

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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:03:06 PM
I appreciate the heads up as well, but at the end of the day, the bathroom and kitchen are always clean and anything else, well, it is what it is.

With 4 young children, I consider it a good day if everything is picked up...if it is not, well, friends of mine don't mind.

As the great Dr. Suess said, those that matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.

scrapper100
Budletsmom

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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:03:28 PM
It depends who it is - I had this happen the other day and had 10 mins warning. I needed to change clothes and I just closed the door to my office/scraproom. My kitchen is a little messy but for the most part the main rooms are usually pretty neat.


Patti

scrapper100
Budletsmom

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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:03:29 PM
It depends who it is - I had this happen the other day and had 10 mins warning. I needed to change clothes and I just closed the door to my office/scraproom. My kitchen is a little messy but for the most part the main rooms are usually pretty neat.


Patti

Ariana_T
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:35:56 PM
I never feel company ready unless my house is perfectly clean. With two little kids home there are always toys everywhere during the daytime hours.

If I stopped by someone's house I wouldn't bat an eye at a mess, I was just raised with a clean freak mom and can't help myself when it comes to company at my own place. So, you're not alone!


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TXDancermom
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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:38:03 PM
just depends on who it is - if it is someone who has seen the "normal" of our house then fine - if not I might be give me 30 min.....


Captain K
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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:43:14 PM

(And when I say messy I mean cluttered and toys everywhere, not dirty).


I don't mean to pick on you, and this may not be your circumstance, but I'm always incredulous when people say this. It's one thing if your house is just a bit cluttered for a day or two because the kids pulled a bunch of stuff out to play and then something happened that you weren't able to clean it up that evening. I'm assuming that is your circumstance, being pregnant

But -- what I am talking about -- lots of people say that whose homes are perpetually cluttered and have stuff everywhere. When your house is like that for more than a few days, YES, YOUR HOUSE IS DIRTY.

There is no way to effectively clean when you have clutter everywhere. If there is stuff on the floor, you cannot vacuum. If there is clutter on flat surfaces, you cannot dust. If dishes sit in your sink for more than a few hours, bacteria is growing in there. If stuff is piled on beds, you can't change the sheets.

A house that is cluttered on a regular basis IS a dirty house, no matter how people want to spin it. I'm not talking about a house that gets messy one day a month.

To the OP, the main level is fine for people to drop by. The upper level isn't as great. Our room is clean, but we let the older kids keep their rooms as they wish. I'd just close the doors on those rooms if someone needed to go upstairs, although generally casual guests just stay on the main level.

mom22reds
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 7:50:12 PM
I would be okay with it. My house isn't perfect, but it's rarely in a condition such that I wouldn't want someone to come over. I could make it presentable within 5 minutes notice. But if it was my BFF, I wouldn't care what my house looked like, and hopefully she wouldn't either!

Sonia


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Organize my entire house one drawer, cabinet, nook and cranny at a time!

Kate-pea
PeaFixture

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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:01:14 PM

I absolutely dread things like neighbors dropping by, because my house is perpetually a mess.

The thing is, we clean religiously once a week. The place goes from disgusting to company-ready in about an hour (many hands make light work). The problem is that it goes back to looking awful within a day or so. We have a lot of people in a little space, two working parents, and no household help.

I would love to blame it all on my DH and kids, but I'm just not a great housekeeper. I really like at least an hour's notice if someone's dropping by!

Carey Ayn
why

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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:05:25 PM
This time of year: Fifteen to twenty minutes and I'd be meh/ok. Close friends and family maybe right away but it depends on the day.

An hour to feel good about it. I don't do much cleaning (other than basic stuff like dishes/wipe down/pick up/laundry maintenance) during the week. We are horrible about toy pick up, but we keep toys contained in the basement mostly.

In the summer, I'm usually better at daily cleaning since I'm home all day, so I'd be ok with a stop by, but I would much prefer a warning to pick up toys and do a quick freshen up since we have dogs and boys.



moveablefeast
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:06:09 PM

But -- what I am talking about -- lots of people say that whose homes are perpetually cluttered and have stuff everywhere. When your house is like that for more than a few days, YES, YOUR HOUSE IS DIRTY.

There is no way to effectively clean when you have clutter everywhere. If there is stuff on the floor, you cannot vacuum. If there is clutter on flat surfaces, you cannot dust. If dishes sit in your sink for more than a few hours, bacteria is growing in there. If stuff is piled on beds, you can't change the sheets.


Well, to be honest - I vacuum around the furniture, I never move it ever to vacuum underneath it. So vacuuming around a little clutter is no big deal to me. And I believe in rearranging your dust only but once in a while, usually when my daughter starts drawing pictures in the dust on the tv screen; so I dust the clutter too, when I get around to that, so that is no big deal to me either. And the dishwasher takes care of the bacteria (and the bleach wipe for the sink). And I toss the stuff off the bed to sleep in it, which tonight is just some clean laundry in case you are curious (I gave up folding to come downstairs and hang out with my husband); which gives me an idea for solving the problem of changing the sheets, which I do roughly once a week, but again, that is no big deal to me either.

So to be honest, I really am good with doing my best. I'm not too worried that the dust bunnies under the couch or today's scandalously yet unwashed lunch containers contain the plague. I do my best, i try, and it is really and truly good enough.

Captain K
AncestralPea

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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:07:28 PM

I absolutely dread things like neighbors dropping by, because my house is perpetually a mess.

The thing is, we clean religiously once a week. The place goes from disgusting to company-ready in about an hour (many hands make light work).


To me this just says you might have very high standards. If your house is cleaned once a week and it only takes an hour to get it all done (even with everyone helping), your house isn't really 'disgusting.' It might have dust on the coffee table and newspapers left strewn about and shoes/backpacks/toys left around, but it isn't really digusting. I think you might be being too hard on yourself! If your house was really so bad that it would be embarrassing if someone came by, I think it would take longer than an hour and you'd probably go more than a week between cleanings

But everyone has a different tolerance level, I'm just saying I think most people who clean once a week and can get it done in an hour probably have half-way decent homes for a friend to stop by.

ladypop
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:12:25 PM
Any time between 10 and 2 I'm good. Before 10, my kitchen is the Breakfast Appocalpse, the days laundry is lying in the hallway floor, the bathroom is full of toothpaste and shaving bristles and the couch is full of cats. After 10, the clothes are clean, the cats are brushed, the dishes are washed and the bathroom is pristine. Then my kids come home at 3 and we start again .


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peano
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:12:44 PM
No one I know just drops by--it's like a relic of another age, like calling cards on a silver tray.

But...if someone were to just drop by, as long as they didn't go upstairs, it would be OK. I'm adamant about a clean kitchen and bathroom, so they are generally always presentable. The tv room where DS hangs out always looks a little rumpled but can be pulled together pretty quickly. I've been better about vaccuming but there'd probably be fluff along the baseboards.


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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:16:44 PM

If someone called and said they were dropping by what would your reaction be? (house cleanliness)


It wouldn't bother me if someone dropped by. My house is not always guest ready, but I figure they can deal with it.

ScrappinMyLife
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:21:49 PM
I am not a fan of drop-ins.

To answer your question:
My home would be ready, except for the never made bed.

However, I would not have much to offer in the way of refreshments. I haven't been buying any snacks(that way I don't eat them), and I usually only drink water, hot tea, and cranberry juice, so that is all I have in stock. So, beverages, would be slim pickings.

AussieMeg
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:27:31 PM
Totally depends on who it is! A have a couple of neat freak friends and I would do a quick run through to hide shit that was lying around, then shut the doors to the rooms where I hid stuff. A quick check of the toilet and bathroom to make sure they were reasonably clean. that's about it.

Other friends and family, I wouldn't worry too much.

My house is NEVER totally 'visitor ready'.

kimberly38
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:30:53 PM
It depends on the type of relationship I had with whoever called. Most people do not call me and tell me they are dropping by. They will ask.

So, if someone called and they told me they were dropping by, I would say, "oh, isn't that nice? Sorry, I will not be available today. THanks for the thought anyhoo!".

Others, if they drop by on short notice and I hve other things to do, I will chat for a bit but then tell them I have things to do. Let's plan a get together for another time.

myshelly
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:35:40 PM
My house is never in a state that I would be embarrassed if people dropped by.

Growing up I was always embarrassed of my house. My mom is the world's worst housekeeper. I swore I would be the opposite and I am.

I am constantly walking around the house straightening/picking up thinking "what would company think if they dropped in right now?"

From birth my kids have been taught that you play with ONE thing, then put it away, then you can play with something else. There is NEVER a huge mess. Never.

I deep clean twice a week.

I had to drop in unannounced to a friend's house today. We had a storm while we were out of the house and it blew our gate out of place in such a way that we couldn't get back into the house, so I knocked on a friend's door and asked if we could come in until my DH got home. I want my friends and family to know they can drop in here like that when they need to.






biochemipea
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Posted: 1/29/2013 8:44:54 PM
Currently I would be quite anxious if someone wanted to drop in because we have a temporary kitchen set up in our dining room/living room.

I actually stopped letting someone come over to my house because I continually felt so judged by her opinion of my home and house-keeping. My house is usually clean (bathroom sinks sometimes need soap scrubbed off and toothpaste splatters from the kids wiped up, but counters and floors are always clean and dishes done) but is definitely lived in.







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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 9:01:20 PM
LOL I'd love to see "right this instant" pictures of all these perfect houses.

I'd be vacuuming like crazy since I have two fuffy hairy dogs.

Janeliz
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 1/29/2013 9:15:20 PM
I'd like to have a few minutes to check the bathrooms for cleanliness and make sure there's TP in there, etc., but other than that I'm good to go.

I look around right now, and there's a basketball on the ottoman, school bags in the front hall, running shoes by the door, and someone's glass on the table next to the couch. It wouldn't bother me to have those things there if someone dropped by, though. It's our home, not a Better Homes & Gardens spread.

freecharlie
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Posted: 1/29/2013 9:16:59 PM
Tonight, would be hell no.

Some nights are fine without picking up (except I would have to clean the toilet because that is something I am anal (ha ha) about if guest come over). Some require a 20 minute cleaning. Some I would freak out. It depends on the night and how hetic things have been.


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PeaFixture

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Posted: 1/29/2013 9:30:48 PM
Total panic.

i'd have to clean the kitchen like a possessed woman on speed and then attack the living room frantically. - i can close off most other doors.





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Posted: 1/29/2013 9:34:59 PM
My house is always company ready. I clean it as I dirty it and deep clean every two weeks.

blumargarita
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Posted: 1/29/2013 11:05:00 PM
I've been working really hard using the philosophy of "One Surface, One Drawer" at a time. My downstairs looks pretty darn good. I run my business from home so that was a priority. But I haven't really focused on the upstairs, which has been neglected for a while. It really needs shampooing, my son's (19) room is a wreck, we are living off one bathroom, etc. Problem
Is this. We have a family in our church that has been evicted and has not been able to find a new rental. I offered them our empty guest room. We've known each other forever, and I've seen her home, so I'm not stressed about her seeing/living up there, but I know people from church who have never been in my home will be here helping them move. ACK!! They still have two days to find a home, so crossing my fingers they find a place!!


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redboots
BucketHead

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Posted: 1/29/2013 11:10:45 PM
I'm not a huge fan of people dropping by unannounced, but not because of the state of my house. We keep it pretty clean around here.

In your case, though, I would have definitely said no - you're sick and in no position to have to put up with company (announced or otherwise). How rude of her to ask!

Pea-T-A-Mom
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Posted: 1/29/2013 11:11:11 PM
If I had 10 minutes, my house would be fine for a drop by.

If it was more than a drop by, ie an overnight guest, I'd need a bit more time.


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Posted: 1/29/2013 11:48:52 PM
I would need about 15 minutes. I try to keep my main floor presentable at all times. In 15 minutes I would wipe down the bathroom, vacuum and sweep. If I can keep it on the main floor I'm usually good to go pretty quickly.


Monique

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Posted: 1/30/2013 12:01:53 AM
We don't use our front room or dining room on a routine basis so they are always clean. I would have no problem inviting someone in to those rooms. The back of our first floor is our kitchen, and breakfast and family rooms. They are cluttered, sometimes worse than others, but it's never so bad that I would turn someone away or freak out. It's clean--we have a cleaning lady once a week--it's just not always picked up.

I have a book called "Life's Too Short to Fold Fitted Sheets" by Lisa Quinn and it's about simplifying. She has a checklist for cleaning your house quickly for company. Do things in this order--

1. Clean the toilet
2. Stash clutter
3. Vacuum carpets and floor
4. Get rid of excessive dust--EXCESSIVE, not just a little
5. Wipe out the yuck in the fridge if people might be going in there
6. Wipe mirrors with a microfiber cloth
7. Check ceilings and light fixtures for cobwebs
8. Shut the bedroom door
9. Spiff yourself up if you have time
10. A spritz of nontoxic spray cleaner in the air right by the front door--it will smell like you've been cleaning

I hate to think that we (universal "we" are not connecting with other people because we are worried about the clutter on the table.

I remember a pea--and I apologize for not remembering who it was--wrote that her mother (or grandmother?) used to say something to the effect of, "If people come to my house looking for dirt I don't want to let them down." People are coming to see YOU.




toaojs
AncestralPea

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Posted: 1/30/2013 12:12:09 AM
Well most of you made me feel better!!
This made me LOL...thanks for making me feel better.

Anything short of a child tied to a chair is a win in that book.


Kiwi-Jo I completely agree with this...

I really don't get the idea that having piles of shoes, or the children's schoolwork, or a sink full of unwashed dishes mean a home isn't company-ready.
Thos things are the sign that family lives there. Sure, they are not acceptable in a show-home - but are your visitors coming to visit a family or a show home?
None of these sorts of things indicate dirtiness or a lack of hygeine.
Would your visitors truly be critical if they happen to see a pile of laundry waiting to be put away? Or a pile of dirty shoes by the door?
If so, I think that says more about them, than it does about you!


I however have a friend(not the one that was dropping by) that her home is literally show home ready EVERY day. I'm not kidding, it is crazy how clean and tidy her house is but is FAR from homey/comfortable....we are always afraid to touch anything, or even help her clean up after supper cause she has HER way. I would much rather have a lived in home than her house.

Guizmom- you are lucky but I am as well usually. My husband is recovering from having a tumor removed from his pituitary gland and is still really weak and honestly is useless right now..hehe. What's funny is that my kid's rooms are the cleanest rooms in the house because I have taught them well enough to do it themselves.

Ariana- I am like you...if someone's house is messy I don't care. In fact, I have been in houses where it was DIRTY and I just decided not to sit down or drink from the cups they offered but still had a nice short visit.



My Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/toaojb/











TinCin
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 29,331
February 2002
Posts: 6,720
Layouts: 0
Loc: Living in the palm of the hand.

Posted: 1/30/2013 12:33:44 AM
No worries, come on by. My house is seldom spotless but it is usually presentable and being ill is a great excuse for a messy house.


PROUD MEMBER OF UAW LOCAL 659 - Home of the Sit-Down Strike!

doesitmatter?
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 509,811
May 2011
Posts: 6,639
Layouts: 27

Posted: 1/30/2013 12:59:28 AM
If I was home it would probably be fine - unless I was meeting a deadline or nor feeling well. I don't keep my house perfect, but it's always presentable enough for friends to drop by / except my craft area - that can be a mess lol'


Child of God, follower of Jesus, and so thankful for His presence in my life <><
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cycworker
On dry runs Santa drives the Isuzu

PeaNut 159,331
July 2004
Posts: 9,903
Layouts: 0
Loc: Vancouver Island, BC, Canada

Posted: 1/30/2013 1:06:12 AM
I'd be fine with it. They ought to be coming to see me, not my home. If people want to get all judge-y about that kind of stuff they should just not come over, period.


-Tania... but people who like me call me `Tang`


The secret of a good life is to have the right loyalties and hold them in the right scale of values.
Norman Thomas
US socialist politician (1884 - 1968)

Human and civil rights should NEVER be subject to the tyranny of the majority. Minorities gain legal equality only when those in power come to understand that their unearned privilege is wrong, and enforce change upon society. - ProfessorZed

I-95
It's all just nonsense anyway!

PeaNut 97,456
July 2003
Posts: 20,385
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Loc: California, NY & Orlando

Posted: 1/30/2013 1:23:06 AM
It would depend on whether the kids were home, or not.

If the kids were home, there would be a trail of shoes, discarded clothing, CDs, iPods, books etc. but those can be picked up in a few minutes. Other than that, we're ready for company.

mytwoandras
PeaFixture

PeaNut 204,991
May 2005
Posts: 3,177
Layouts: 100
Loc: New Jersey

Posted: 1/30/2013 1:26:38 AM
As I get older I keep my house cleaner. If somebody called to say they were stopping over I would have to straighten up and probably do dishes. I guess it would take 15 minutes to be clean. In five it could be neat.

This is because one of our children moved out so we have two less dogs and one room that is always clean. The other bedrooms and playroom are in a different part of the house so we just keep the door shut if they are messy.

In our young married years we would have needed a lot of notice


visit me at my blog:my pair-a-dice

writermom1
Thrift Whisperer

PeaNut 114,407
November 2003
Posts: 22,729
Layouts: 66
Loc: At the intersection of Hooterville and Stars Hollow

Posted: 1/30/2013 7:35:07 AM
Hope you are better OP.

Re: the "lived in is more comfortable" argument.

I have to say I have two friends who have homes that are always show-ready as far as I've seen. It's breathtaking. It is also comfortable and welcoming. Despite the popular opinion that "lived in" is superior, these homes are inspiring to me, not at all cold or uninviting.

Granted they always inspire me to want to run home and purge something - possibly redecorate




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raindancer
Capt. Sparrow's Pirate Wench

PeaNut 217,886
August 2005
Posts: 16,684
Layouts: 44

Posted: 1/30/2013 8:18:08 AM
If I have been sick or in the middle if finals I would freak out a bit, normally though its fine. My neighbors stop by fairly regularly so I try to keep it at least clean enough so I'm not embarrassed to let them in if they need a cup of sugar.


~Heidi~



"You can make excuses or you can make progress but you can't make both."
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BEF2008
AncestralPea

PeaNut 183,504
January 2005
Posts: 4,477
Layouts: 0

Posted: 1/30/2013 8:59:15 AM
Our home is not House Beautiful but it's not a pig stye either. It's a lived-in house and I am not going to stress myself out on a daily basis to make it any more than that.

It could always be cleaner for guests and if I have warning, it'll be cleaner. With no warning, I'm not going to stop living in my home just to keep it clean IN CASE someone stops by.

AKathy
Peaing From Podunk

PeaNut 45,443
August 2002
Posts: 16,554
Layouts: 93
Loc: North Dakota

Posted: 1/30/2013 9:38:29 AM
I'm a neat freak who lives alone so my house is always company ready. C'mon over!


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Mother Goose's Meandering Mind


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