Am I just getting old and crotchety, or would this bug you also?

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Posted 2/5/2013 by devildog in NSBR Board
 

devildog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:41:54 AM
The house directly across the street from us...we're not friends with them, but we wave, dh will occasionally talk to the dh, etc. They have 4 kids, the youngest of which is a junior in hs. As of now, only 2 live at home, one is a girl, out of college working, and then the hs kid. We don't have any issues with them, never have. The kids were always respectful, no trouble, etc.

This kid uses our driveway as a way to turnaround. He parks facing one way on the street, but he always pulls into our driveway, backs out, and then drives out the opposite way he was parked. He does this every.single.day.

We have had our mailbox hit twice, we have tire marks on our grass by our driveway, and a neighbor on the other side of me had her mailbox hit once (I've seen him use her driveway to turnaround if we have a lot of action out front). And honestly, their friends, girlfriends, etc. have done it also.

My dh has asked the kid to not use our driveway, yet he still does it. We bought a new mailbox to be put in, but to be honest, I don't want the friggin' thing hit.

WTH--drive around the block!

So, am I just a cranky old lady?

little mama
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:43:24 AM
It wouldnt bother me that he was using my driveway to turn around, but the damage he has done would definitely bother me.

dizzypea
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:45:43 AM
It would bother me! Especially because of the damage and that he's been asked not to. I would give the parents a bill for the mailbox and explain that he's been asked not to use the driveway but continues to do so.

tallydale
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:46:56 AM
That would not bother me, but I live on a cul-de-sac and we like our 4 neighbors that live around us. We have and are going through the experience of young/new drivers and we just make sure they know what they should/should not do.
What would bother me is that your DH has asked him and he ignored it. In that case, maybe a casual mention to the parent might work.

blondiek237
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:47:04 AM
I agree--I would not have an issue with the turnaround, but would have issues with the damage. My friend lives on a busy street and has a large driveway and people were always using it to turnaround. He bought a sign (no turning in driveway--its like a street sign) and he planted it in a bucket of cement and he puts it in the middle of the entrance to the drive. So far so good.

AnniesPaperGarden
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:51:21 AM
The turning around in my driveway wouldn't bother me but the damage done to the mailbox and grass would.

Dalai Mama
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:53:55 AM
I thought no big deal until I saw there was damage. That would make anyone cranky.

Peabay
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:56:08 AM
Another one who wouldn't care - at all- about the turnaround. But the damage? That would bother me.Not sure what you can do though if you've already asked him.

biochemipea
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:56:11 AM

It wouldnt bother me that he was using my driveway to turn around, but the damage he has done would definitely bother me.
This.

devildog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:02:43 AM
Alright, I think it's confirmed, I am crotchety, lol. The damage ticks me off, but it annoys me he does this every single day.

So, dh did say he was going to talk with the dad when we put in the new mailbox. While we have the gut feeling, and know one of the kids, or friends, from there has hit our mailbox, we never saw it, either time. The first time I thought it was the mail lady, or FedEx, or something. But then I started noticing him using the driveway all the time. I don't think it's just a coincidence. Same thing with the grass. We never had problems until this kid started driving.


PierKiss
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:05:47 AM
I would be upset by the damage. I wouldn't care that he turned around in the driveway.

giatocj
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:10:42 AM
The turning, no. The damage, absolutely.

~Alison~
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:33:04 AM
I wouldn't mind the turning in the driveway. The damage anyone would be upset at.

purplepackrat
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:37:23 AM
Can you park at the end of your driveway? That's actually the common practice in neighborhood because all of our driveways go down a huge hill to our back yards. We park at the top end so we can use our front level entry doors. Just made me think perhaps you could do the same, but for a different reason.

devildog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:45:42 AM
We couldn't park at the end of our driveway because there wouldn't be enough room between where our driveway meets the street and the public sidewalk that we can't block (if that makes sense). Plus, we park our cars in the garage.

Maryland
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:49:10 AM
You don't have to be "old" to be bothered by rudeness! So no you are not old and this would bug me also. The turning around wouldn't if he is a nice kid. But the damage would! I can't believe he didn't offer to pay for the damage or you didn't tell his parents. I would maybe place things at the bottom of the driveway to prevent him from going near your mailbox or grass. I can't believe he damaged your yard and mailbox more than once!


Deena714
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Posted: 2/5/2013 9:11:41 AM
Yep, it would bother me. Especially if my property is being destroyed.

We live in a twin and share a driveway. And by share, I mean the driveway is two cars wide with an additional parking spot on each side. Looks like a cross. There is NO REASON to go in the other person's part of the driveway.

Our neighbor is constantly pulling in our parking spot so they can back into theirs. It hurts nothing, but it drives me crazy!!! Stop it!!
Once or twice I have been in my car backing up and the neighbor FLIES in the driveway into our parking spot and I nearly back into her. WHY would you be in MY half of the driveway!!!! STOP IT!!
UGH, had to get that out.

eebud
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Posted: 2/5/2013 9:16:04 AM
Maybe a few decorative boulders in strategic places will stop the damage to your yard and mailbox, regardless of who is doing it.

In our old house, we had alley entrances. Our house was on the corner of the alley in the rear. We had some yard in the back that turned the corner onto the alley street to exit onto the main street. The trash truck was the worst offender about running over our yard and putting large ruts in it, especially if it had been raining. We build a raised (about 1.5 to 2 foot) garden in that area with stone and boulders. It was all reinforced behind the stone and boulders with concrete. One of the largest boulders was strategically placed right at the corner. There is no way anyone could run over it then. There was tons of room to turn properly so there was no reason to run over our yard and this put a stop to it.

lovetodigi
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Posted: 2/5/2013 9:19:48 AM
His turning around in the driveway would not bother me, but the damage certainly would. The disrespect that he showed your DH by ignoring his request to stop using your driveway would really convince me to talk to his parents. Can you get a couple of nice big flower pots to set on either side of your driveway, put hooks in them and string a chain across when you are not using the driveway yourself. After awhile he may break the habit or move away and you can remove the chains. The damage is costing you money and that is not right.

KittenOnTheKeys
PeaFixture

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Posted: 2/5/2013 9:38:18 AM
They make an alarm/chime that notifies you when someone drives up in your driveway. You could use this to look out an witness in the event that he is the one doing the damage (and I believe he is the one).

devildog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 9:48:03 AM

Our neighbor is constantly pulling in our parking spot so they can back into theirs. It hurts nothing, but it drives me crazy!!! Stop it!!


That's exactly how I feel (even though we have had the damage), I just want to say, "STOP IT!" lol.

I think what bugs me so much about this is why doesn't he pull into his own driveway? Yeah, it's easier I guess to swing into ours, but he can swing into his and chooses not to. I guess I just wouldn't use a neighbor's property on a daily basis, sometimes more than once a day, to turnaround when I could (1) use my own driveway, or (2) just go around the block to get out of here.

Again, the damage is another issue. No excuse for it, and it shouldn't be happening. My dh has suggested the possibility of pots or boulders, but I don't know, we'll see. I'm hoping when my dh says something to the dad it'll stop.

mikklynn
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 10:09:05 AM

I thought no big deal until I saw there was damage. That would make anyone cranky.


This! Since the kid is respectful, could you point out the damage to the lawn and ask him again, nicely, to not use your driveway?

gmcwife1
SamFan

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Posted: 2/5/2013 10:24:55 AM
Using the driveway as a turn around wouldn't bother me. But like many others, damaging my property would and I would say something or have them replace the damaged items.


~ Dori ~

jenne94
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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:00:27 AM
Honestly-- yeah, it WOULD bug me. It would bug me a lot. For the same reason that it bugs me to no end that my neighbor can't park that friggin' wreck that he drives in front of his own damn house instead of mine!


It just seems so... entitled I guess. Why can't you use your own damn property to turn around & stay off of mine??

And the damage would make me livid.


So I guess I'm old and crochety too.

Scrapn Nana
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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:42:34 AM
It wouldn't bother me except that there is damage occurring, presumably due to his carelessness.

I have a shared driveway. Our neighbor's teen age son consistently backed down the driveway driving on our lawn half the time. His friends parked on our lawn. Big ruts were being left, since it sometimes happened when it had rained.

My solution: I bought big rocks from a garden center. I positioned them all along the driveway. They were nice looking, so they looked somewhat decorative, but they were also big enough to damage the fender and underside of a car.

Suddenly there was no more parking on our lawn, no more backing down over the grass, and no more deepening of the ruts. I didn't have to talk to the parents for the umpteenth time. It completely solved the problem in a peaceable way.

I suggest you place a big rock on each side of the entrance to your driveway, and especially position one of them in a way that will protect your mailbox at the same time. He'll probably start using someone else's driveway, but at least you won't have to keep replacing your mailbox or fixing the damage.

melanell
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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:46:17 AM
I wouldn't mind at all......if he could drive properly.

However, as it appears that he cannot drive properly, then yes, I would mind.

Ariana_T
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:46:38 AM

It wouldnt bother me that he was using my driveway to turn around, but the damage he has done would definitely bother me.


The above are my thoughts, also!

I'd try talking to his parents since he didn't listen to your husband when he asked him. There's no reason someone who can't control their vehicle well when turning needs to be using your driveway as a turn around!

ilovebuble
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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:47:59 AM
Using my driveway to turn around would not bother me, the damage would.

WorkingClassDog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 11:57:39 AM

Honestly-- yeah, it WOULD bug me. It would bug me a lot. For the same reason that it bugs me to no end that my neighbor can't park that friggin' wreck that he drives in front of his own damn house instead of mine!


I know that feeling!! Get this. Our next door neighbor always parks his two vehicles in the street every single day. Does not use the garage or driveway. Fine. Although the second vehicle is somewhat in front of our house. Whatever, we deal with it. BUT then they moved out (they are renters) and moved in the house next to them, they are now two doors down, but they STILL park in front of the old house. I would have issues if I was the one renting the house they moved out of and see their vehicles there every single day. Why can't they park on the driveway or the garage? (the garage has space cause I have seen it)

auntkelly
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Posted: 2/5/2013 12:10:49 PM
He sounds like a really rotten kid if you asked him not to use the driveway and he continues to do so. You could talk to his dad, but the kid probably doesn't obey his dad either. I'd try out the decorative rocks.

dynalady
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Posted: 2/5/2013 12:17:25 PM
The turnaround wouldn't bother me at all. The damage would, but I wouldn't hurry to accuse him unless you actually see it happen. Too many other people using the driveway to be sure it's him just because the turning bugs you.

Sharl
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Posted: 2/5/2013 12:36:59 PM
Damage or no damage, yeah, it would bother me. So add me to your crotchety old lady list. I can't see why he should do it every. single. day. It is still your property and he should respect that. And actually, why can't he turn around using HIS own driveway? Anyway, I'm on your side. It would definitely bug me and I would say something also.

beachgirl55
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Posted: 2/5/2013 12:44:37 PM
Can you get 2 nice big boulders and put them on either side of your driveway? That's what I'd be tempted to do.

Ann

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Posted: 2/5/2013 1:08:13 PM
The using my driveway to turn around wouldn't bother me.
Has anyone actually SEEN the kid or his friends hit a mailbox?
If nobody has seen it there's nothing that can be done. And you can't be sure it was any of the kids

Honestly, I would watch. Catch him hitting my mailbox and call the police.
Hitting a mailbox is serious.
Did you know that danaging a mailbox is a federal offense and also violates local laws?
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MetalDancer
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 1:10:53 PM

It wouldnt bother me that he was using my driveway to turn around, but the damage he has done would definitely bother me.



Yes, this. If damage to property had been done, he would be either paying for repairs or doing them himself. My mailbox has been hit, too. It's still standing, but the post is split. I liked the Pea who suggested the big rocks!

I frequently have folks turn around in my driveway. I'm the first driveway on a dead end street. Folks turn in, realize they're in the wrong place and I'm the first place to turn around. At night, though, it kind of creeps me out. My bedroom is on the driveway-side of the house and the headlights shine right in my window, right where my bed is. I do have shades; I can see out but you can't see in. But when they swing into your driveway at 11:30pm, it's a little nerve wracking. We're out in the country with just a few houses on our street and a "questionable" new neighbor.

devildog
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Posted: 2/5/2013 1:45:34 PM
No, we have not seen him actually hit the mailbox. The first time the mailbox was hit I thought it was the mail lady, or FedEx, or something. Then, I started seeing the tire marks on our lawn, then neighbor's box was hit also, and then ours was hit again. And as for our neighbor, I've seen the kid use her driveway to turn around, and so has she.

So no, we can't be 100% certain it is him, but I don't believe it's a coincidence either. The 2 driveways he turns around in have damage.

What I am certain of, for a fact, he uses our drive way every single day, sometimes several times. We certainly can't accuse him if we don't see him do it, but when we suspected it was him (or possibly a friend) my dh asked him to please not use our driveway. He continues to do so.

BEF2008
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Posted: 2/5/2013 1:52:54 PM
A possible suggestion for you:

I have a friend who lives next door to a school and runs a business out of her home. She has a MAJOR problem with people parking IN her driveway, ACROSS her driveway, and/or turning around in her driving (and creating the same problems you have with the lawn being driven over, etc.)

She bought those orange cones you see in construction areas and placed 3 of them across the width of her driveway at the end. In order to pull into the driveway you'd have to drive over them. It has also kept the majority of people (not everyone, shockingly) from parking across the end of her driveway.

Of course they have to move them to back out themselves but that's less hassle than trying to find the person who PARKED across their driveway and went into the school when they want to leave.

Shih Tzu Mommy
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Posted: 2/5/2013 3:02:15 PM
He can use your driveway, but he cannot hit your mailbox or ruin your lawn!

I would present his parents with a bill for your new mailbox and landscaping work and I bet you'll find those issues resolve themselves.

Momof1sweet-lil-lad
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Posted: 2/5/2013 3:32:26 PM
Yes, it would bother me and has.

There is a half circle in front of our house (two enterances to our property). The bus stop is at the lower enterance. Our neighbors just drive right around it & wait for the bus to arrive. Irritates the cr@p out of me! There has been far too many times when I have had to wait for the bus to come, so the cars can clear out and I can get out of my driveway and onto my destination. (The way the half-circle is set up, I can't turn the vehicle to go the otherway or I would.)

They aren't the only ones to do so either. Apparently there are these signs that say 'TURN AROUND HERE' and I'm the only one that can't see them.

We've had people, who were just turning around, take out half of one of the bushes. There have also been a few wrecks, because the trespassers do not realize that there is a terrible blind hill when pulling out of the lower end. I'm quite concerned about being sued over someone's accident, when they had the audacity to come on our property uninvited, for the sole purpose of changing directions.

I haven't convinced my husband to put up gates, yet!

kipper
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Posted: 2/5/2013 3:34:28 PM
We are the first house on a dead end street and people use our driveway to turn around in all the time. It is so annoying.

I totally understand your being bothered by it!

I don't know why it bothers me so much, but it does. We have headlights shine in our livingroom every night because of people turning aroung.

UGH!

Good luck with the neighbor. The kid should have had to buy you a new mailbox!!!


Momof1sweet-lil-lad
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Posted: 2/5/2013 3:51:36 PM
Oh, a solution to the mailbox.

Encase that puppy in concrete & brick!

Every once in a while, a group of people decides it will be fun to destroy mailboxes with baseball bats. They like taking out the single mailboxes as they drive by.

There have been a number of interesting solutions, evident as you drive by. But, the most attractive are the nicely done boxes that have brick surrounding them.

busypea
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Posted: 2/5/2013 3:58:34 PM

It wouldnt bother me that he was using my driveway to turn around, but the damage he has done would definitely bother me.

This.

scrapping buckeye
StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 2/5/2013 4:42:38 PM
Yea messing up my mailbox would make me mad - I would just put some giant rocks or pavers around it. That way if he hits it, it messes up his car. That will fix the problem I bet.

transprntbutterfly
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Posted: 2/5/2013 7:48:18 PM
It would bother me.

I live on a corner. My drive is on the side street. My neighbor's drive is on the main street. There is a strip of grass between my drive and the neighbor's drive. People that visit my neighbors use my drive to park in when visiting the neighbor or drive into my drive through the strip of grass and into the neighbor's drive. I have ruts in my yard from this and have been blocked in my garage or out of my drive more than once.

Drives.me.crazy! It's not the neighbor's but people visiting them and I find it horribly rude of people to assume my drive and yard are an access area for the next door neighbor's drive.

So, I don't think you are old and crotchety at all!

scrap4maddie
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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:00:21 PM
You don't even know it was him? Turning around and parking in front of people's houses happen. If you don't want to block off your driveway with cones or something as someone mentioned your only other option is to sit out there and watch the mailbox all day.

I live in the first house on the street. People turn around in my driveway all day. No big deal.

Kate-pea
PeaFixture

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Posted: 2/5/2013 8:05:46 PM
Guess I'm old and crotchety, too. The turning around would bug me, damage or no damage. Now that you say he *could* use his own driveway, I find it even more annoying!

If you're sure that his guests are also using your driveway, maybe you could ask him to "let his friends know" that they shouldn't use your driveway because you're having damage done to your yard and mailbox... That would let him know that there IS damage and you're noticing it, but it stops short of accusing him directly.
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