18 and in High School

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Posted 10/22/2013 by Henny Button in NSBR Board
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Henny Button
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Posted: 10/22/2013 9:51:54 PM
Ugh. My son turned 18 on August 31, just a few days after the start of his senior year. It's something I didn't think of when I started him in kindergarten at 6 instead of 5.

Today, he had a dentist appointment. He needed a treatment on his gums that required a consent form. They handed it to me and I was just about to initial and sign when I remembered that he's 18 and I can't do it for him anymore.

He had a field project for his AP Environmental Science class Saturday and I didn't even think about signing a permission slip. He called me asking for me to text that I knew where he was because his teacher needed to see it. I didn't even think about a permission slip because he's 18.

I'm still not sure about what to do if he gets sick and has to miss school. Does he get to call in the absence himself?

As far as I'm concerned, he may be a legal adult but he isn't an adult until after he graduates high school. Heck, I won't consider him an adult until he graduates college, is working, and is out on his own.

For the record, my daughter is 30, married, has a child and a house. I've considered her a full-grown adult since she graduated college.


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cmpeter
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Posted: 10/22/2013 9:55:33 PM
My son will be 18 in Jan and still in school. For all school related things, he will still need my permission. I would continue to make the calls for absences and sign all the permission slips.


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Knotlazy
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Posted: 10/22/2013 9:56:54 PM
I understand completely! My DS turned 18 the first of Oct of his Senior year of high school...caused all kinds of issues! I couldn't even get his transcript when he graduated! Stupid law....they should not be considered and adult until they graduate high school.....

I had to fight to get to PAY tuition when my DD was in college! They wouldn't give me access to her website to pay! And then, they required her to change her password every 6 weeks or so for security...however I never had access to pay the bill! Gah!

myshelly
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Posted: 10/22/2013 9:58:25 PM


Aren't most people 18 when they graduate?

Here anyone who has a bday after Sept 1 is 18 when he graduates from HS.

I mean, you start school at 5 then have 13 years of school, 13+5 = 18 and in HS even if you start at 5.

I graduated at 17. I started at 5 and then skipped a grade.


Henny Button
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:00:29 PM
Most people are 18 when they graduate. However, most aren't 18 their entire senior year. Heck, my niece was 17 when she started college because of an October birthday.


Sandi
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myshelly
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:03:34 PM
Well there are tons of kids who are 18 their whole senior year here. If you bday is late august, sept, or October you would be 18 your whole senior year here unkess you skip a grade.

You HAVE to be 5 BEFORE school starts.



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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:04:23 PM
Uhhhh, most people turn 18 in HS. That's the way it's supposed to be.



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Henny Button
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:04:38 PM

I had to fight to get to PAY tuition when my DD was in college! They wouldn't give me access to her website to pay! And then, they required her to change her password every 6 weeks or so for security...however I never had access to pay the bill! Gah!



Don't get me going on that. My DD went off to UCLA in 2001. They would mail me the bill for her fees, but it sometimes didn't arrive until 2-3 days before it was due. After two times of her not being able to register because the fees hadn't been applied, I started putting money directly into her bank account from my paycheck so she could pay her college fees and housing herself. It just wasn't worth the hassle for me to do it.


Sandi
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SydneyDeAnn
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:07:29 PM
I was 18 for most of my senior year, a September birthday. Where I went to school your parents still had to sign everything unless they signed a paper saying your 18 year old didn't need your signature on anything. This allowed for students to sign themselves out of school which wasn't always used responsibly

NoWomanNoCry
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:11:01 PM
I turned 18 the month before I started my Sr. year. If I didn't attend school for a day I would have to write my own note saying "please excuse me from school on --- I wasn't feeling well" if I wanted to leave school early I just drove off campus. When I miss school they would call my apt (I had my own apt) just to notify me I wasn't in school lol. Needless to say I enjoyed my last year of high school very much.
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:15:00 PM
I would call the registrar tmw and find out what the protocol is for 18 year old seniors. It could be that each school, county or state has it's own policy.


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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:16:51 PM
I turned 18 a matter of days before graduation, so it wasn't an issue for me, but my high school require parent/guardian signatures/permission regardless of age. You could not excuse your own absence just because you were 18, nor could you sign permission slips for field trips, etc..

Mallie
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:17:06 PM

I had to fight to get to PAY tuition when my DD was in college! They wouldn't give me access to her website to pay! And then, they required her to change her password every 6 weeks or so for security...however I never had access to pay the bill! Gah!


Don't get me going on that. My DD went off to UCLA in 2001. They would mail me the bill for her fees, but it sometimes didn't arrive until 2-3 days before it was due. After two times of her not being able to register because the fees hadn't been applied, I started putting money directly into her bank account from my paycheck so she could pay her college fees and housing herself. It just wasn't worth the hassle for me to do it.
Thirded. PITA.

We ended up switching the account with dd20's college money in it that we created to a credit union at which she has her checking account. My name is on both accounts so that when the tuition bill comes due, I can switch the money from the college account into her checking account so she can pay the bill.

CarolT
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:18:26 PM
Our schools require parental consent for 18 year olds living at home. If they have documentation on file that they are living on their own or with someone other than a parent, they can sign for themselves for field trips, excuse absences, etc. My kids were 17 when they graduated, since they have early August birthdays.

Their colleges had a parental access portal available that they (the students) could give us access to so we could pay bills and add money to their accounts.


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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:25:40 PM

I mean, you start school at 5 then have 13 years of school, 13+5 = 18 and in HS even if you start at 5.



Numbers are a funny thing


5+5=10, right? So if your are 5 when you start kindy and you go to school for 5 years you would be__?
K-5
1st-6
2nd-7
3rd-8
4th-9

9, not 10. Silly numbers



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cmpeter
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:27:27 PM
My dd will be 17 when she graduates. Ds's girlfriend turns 17 this weekend and she's a senior, so she'll be 17 when she graduates.


Cindi

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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:28:28 PM
Well there are tons of kids who are 18 their whole senior year here. If you bday is late august, sept, or October you would be 18 your whole senior year here unkess you skip a grade.

You HAVE to be 5 BEFORE school starts.

---

I believe you're in Texas, and you couldn't be more wrong if you tried.

You don't have to be 5 before school starts. You have to be 5 by Aug. 31. School regularly starts the third or fourth week of August here. My DH was 17 when he graduated and our DS will also be 17.


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myshelly
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:29:09 PM
But most people change ages during the school year so

K = 5/6
1= 6/7
2=7/8
etc
12 = 17/18 Most people turn 18 during their senior year. Meaning they are 18 and in HS.






myshelly
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:32:01 PM

You don't have to be 5 before school starts. You have to be 5 by Aug. 31. School regularly starts the third or fourth week of August here. My DH was 17 when he graduated and our DS will also be 17.



Yes, I'm in TX.

In both the district we live in and the district where DH teaches elementary school, the students have NEVER started that early. The rule here is effectively you have to be 5 on the first day of school bc they don't start before the very end of August.

ETA: DH has been an elementary school teacher in TX for 13 yrs and I taught elementary school before I went to law school. Districts can have different rules. For example, the State says Kindergarten is not required. The school district we live in says if you did not go to kindergarten in this district you cannot go to first grade in this district.

And in any case, how does a difference of a couple of days at most between what you are saying and what I am saying equal "could not be more wrong"? Exaggerate much?

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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:32:25 PM

Aren't most people 18 when they graduate?
I was 17 when I graduated. Didn't turn 18 until the following August. I started Kindergarten when I had just barely turned 5.

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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:33:15 PM
That's why I said most, Jenelle, not all.

The "system" was set up for kids to turn legal age as they prepare to legally go out on their own. Do they all? Of course not. But most do and it's odd that people would consider this a problem.

My dad and I graduated at 18; my sister and mom at 17. We didn't have any problems being 18, no more than they did at 17.



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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:35:10 PM

I'm still not sure about what to do if he gets sick and has to miss school. Does he get to call in the absence himself? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You will need to ask the school administration (secretary) about this. It varies by school district. Some allow them to call in their own absence. Some do not.


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busypea
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:38:28 PM

The school district we live in says if you did not go to kindergarten in this district you cannot go to first grade in this district.

How is that even legal for a public school? What if a family relocates into the district, went to a private kindergarten, or was homeschooled for K?

myshelly
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:41:49 PM

How is that even legal for a public school? What if a family relocates into the district, went to a private kindergarten, or was homeschooled for K?


The rule was designed to keep people who homeschool for kindy out of 1st grade. If you homeschool for kindy you repeat kindy instead of going to first grade. Homeschooling is VERY popular here.

It is also designed to keep people who go to a private school kindy bc of age (child is too young to start kindy at a public school) out of first grade. There is also a rule in this district that you must be 6 to start 1st grade. So if you went to a private school to start kindy early, you have to repeat kindy to go to 1st grade.

I don't know about the moving situation.

I don't like the rule and I'm not saying it's a good one. But it is on the books here.

We homeschool.




Darkangel090260
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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:47:53 PM
The only thing I see a problem could be dating. i would have a long talk about it sine he is 18.


I have quite a few learing disabilitys that effect my spelling a grammer. I do know my grammer and spelling suck. I have been working on this problem all my adult life.

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Posted: 10/22/2013 10:48:04 PM
I was only 17 when I graduated. My son will turn 18 shortly after his senior year starts. My DD won't be 18 until about a month after she graduates. Funny how things work.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 12:07:43 AM
My DD graduated on June 1 and turned 18 on June 7. She was diagnosed with clinical depression her senior year. I was super glad that she was still a minor as we were going through everything to get her treatment. It was just do much easier.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 12:08:41 AM
My oldest DS started school at 4 and graduated at 17. That's why my youngest DS started school at 6. Thar meant he was 18 his entirecsenior year. I think I sent in paperwork that allowed him to sign his own permission slips and notes.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 12:11:36 AM
I was only 17 when I graduated. I started kindergarten when I was 4 .


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Posted: 10/23/2013 12:41:34 AM
Your dr office/ dental office and schools have the appropriate forms you and he can fill out so that you can still access his medical data and determine who will maybe his educational decisions.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 2:15:42 AM
I was living independently a few days after my 17th birthday. (grade 11) Never gave a second thought to anything. I was my own boss. Never ran into issues.
Turned 18 part way through grade 12. Again no issues anywhere.

My kids started kindy at 5 (summer birthdays) and will graduate at 17.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 5:52:54 AM

Aren't most people 18 when they graduate?


Our cutoff date is Dec. 1st for kindergarten in NY. My son and I are September babies,so we were both turning 18 the first or second week of college.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:15:43 AM
When I was a senior my parents had to call in for me or sign any paperwork. About halfway through I got married though so I was my own boss. I would call myself in if I wouldn't make it in that day.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:16:38 AM
Another 17 year old graduate and I have two kids who were/will be 17 year old graduates.

In our district, once you're 18 you can sign yourself out of school if you feel like it. And your parents don't have to know. I get that they're adults, but there still seems to be something weird about it.



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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:27:31 AM

Uhhhh, most people turn 18 in HS. That's the way it's supposed to be.


Another 17 year old here. She was 4 1/2 when she started kindergarten.





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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:30:56 AM
DD was 17 when she started college. I had access to all her grades and medical records for a month until she turned 18. Now all I get is the payment portal. Her college doesn't release grades to parents for students 18 and over for any reason.

She was 4 when she started kindergarten, and perfectly legal here.

OP, I never thought about it, but DS will be 18 in the January of his senior year.

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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:34:40 AM
I have a kid who will turn 18 in about a month, and is still in high school. We actually had this just come up at the beginning of the school year as they sent home a form that allowed the kids to arrange their schedules so as to be able to leave the school a period early.

In the case of our senior, we decided that his behavior was not responsible enough to handle the free time appropriately while waiting around to pick up his brothers. This led to him claiming that 18 he could sign himself out if we signed the appropriate paperwork. Again, we thought that he was not responsible enough to have that kind of freedom.

Lots and lots of arguments ensued, but we never did give permission for him to have free reign to decide if he wanted to go to school or not. I spoke to the school and basically what they said was that school trumps age and that without our permission, he would still be required to have parental permission for all field trips, leaving early, missing school, etc.

Interestingly, the same kid is taking dual enrollment classes (which, by the way, are the ONLY classes he is doing well in.) He is currently a minor and I still can not access his grades at the college without his permission.

I think it is a delicate balance. At 18, he is fully an adult in the eyes of the law so he has the ability to have WAY more freedom than that of a 17 year old senior. He will be able to make his own way out of school with the very real argument that he is an adult. At the same time, he still lives at home and is still bound to us to determine his freedom while here. I hope that we can figure it out without killing each other.

(I have another son with a July birthday so he won't turn 18 until after he graduates.)

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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:38:52 AM

Uhhhh, most people turn 18 in HS. That's the way it's supposed to be.
That would depend largely on when the kindergarten cutoff was. Here, it's December 31st so, while graduating at 18 is fairly common, most kids (by a small margin) graduate when they are 17.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:41:05 AM
It is currently nearly impossible to have 17 year old graduates at our school. You would need to skip a grade to achieve that. No one under the age of 5 may start public school here.

But when I was 18 and in high school (and my siblings as well), our parents still signed permission slips and sent in excuses for absences. That's just how they do it. They still want the parents involved if at all possible.

Now, kids were able to sign themselves in and out of school. But we were able to do that on our own from the point that we had our own vehicles (16 & up). However, a note from the parent saying that we were going to leave the school (or an excuse from a doctor or dentist) was still needed in order for the time to be excused.



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Posted: 10/23/2013 6:41:34 AM
My DD turned 18 in Nov. of her senior year. I still signed her forms etc.

As for the doctor etc. at least here in IL. 17 is the age of consent. They must following wizarding age laws of adulthood!




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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:04:35 AM
Once they are 18, they are adults in the eyes of the law.

A parent cannot access anything if their child is 18.

BEST GIFT to anyone turning 18. A month before their birthday, take them to a lawyer (some do this pro-bono or reduced cost) and prepare a will, a power of attorney for health/medical and a power of attorney for financial.

This paper gives you the authorization so that you can get the information with out it being a PITA.

Also, this gives you the ability to made medical decisions should your child get injured and require medical help.

Be pro-active and get the paper stuff ready BEFORE there is an issue.





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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:10:18 AM

BEST GIFT to anyone turning 18. A month before their birthday, take them to a lawyer (some do this pro-bono or reduced cost) and prepare a will, a power of attorney for health/medical and a power of attorney for financial.


None of which really helps with the school issue.

My son will turn 18 two months into his senior year, our school district requires the parent to sign all permission forms and excuse all absences unless the student was 18 when the school years began.


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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:13:41 AM
It may not help with the school issue but there will be other issues.

In Ontario (Canada), the once a child turns 18 means that the parents have no access to any information and it has been this way since at least 2000, when I required information on my newly graduated son (who had just turned 18).

Check with your state law. The schools may not be following the law to the letter.




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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:15:24 AM
Ok so I started school in Colorado and my school district standards at that time you had to be 5 to start school, so there would be a few 17 year olds when graduating but everyone would be 18 by college. They could sign themselves out, and excuse themselves, at 18. No need for parental permission.

But I moved to Nebraska in high school, same rule to start however it had a big difference. What you ask? Nebraska's age of majority is 19. Therefore at 18 you are a minor. Period. So even though I have an April birthday I went to school with people who turned 18 as school began that year and everyone needed permission. Made school rules easy for administrators I'd say.


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Maryland
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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:24:47 AM
My oldest two won't turn 18 until after they graduate from high school. Our youngest will turn 18 a couple months before she graduates.

My husband didn't turn 18 until 5 months after he started college!

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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:47:39 AM

I was only 17 when I graduated. I started kindergarten when I was 4 .



Same here...and I didn't turn 18 until nine months AFTER I graduated from high school.

DS will 18 in December and one of the things that I need to check on is his car insurance. I just paid our policy (all three of us) for 6 months so I need to find out if it needs to be separated out into a policy for him and one for DH and I.

One thing I'm glad about though is he'll now be able to pick up his prescription for his ADD, something that a minor can't do. That will save me or DH a trip and he'll be able to go to the walk in clinic by himself if needed.





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Posted: 10/23/2013 7:52:01 AM
My husband and I were both 17 when we graduated from high school.

He joined the Navy after graduation. His parents had to sign consent forms for him to join since he was still a minor. He turned 18 in boot camp.

I was still 17 when I started college.

My oldest and youngest sons attend college in Alabama where the age of consent is 19. They couldn't apply for dorm rooms for their sophomore year without my signature on the paperwork as well because they weren't old enough, being that they were only 18 at the time.


~~Kaye~~

My Blog

OSUBuckeyeFan
When does football season start?

PeaNut 182,623
December 2004
Posts: 7,038
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Loc: USA

Posted: 10/23/2013 7:54:47 AM
I was 17 when I graduated high school! My birthday is in August so I started kindergarten RIGHT after turning 5. I did very well in school my entire career.




LisaLisa
PeaFixture

PeaNut 67,553
February 2003
Posts: 3,142
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Posted: 10/23/2013 8:28:39 AM
Both of my DDs have summer birthdays, as did my sister and I, so they will be 17 when they graduate. Cutoff here is December.

Don't forget, there are kids who have taken Pre-K before entering Kindergarten, so they are a year older than most K kids.

DD1 was 13 this summer, so she started 8th grade as a 13 year old. Her BFF did a year of Pre-K and her birthday is in May. So she started 8th grade as a 14 year old, and will turn 15 in May 2014. So she will actually be 19 during her senior year in HS!

Plus, driver's training can start at 15 here, so she thinks she will be doing that before 8th grade is up!!! HAHAHA Don't think her parents will go for that!



Miss Ang
I'm a Toilet Paper Pea. Are you?

PeaNut 26,443
January 2002
Posts: 12,621
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Loc: Illinois

Posted: 10/23/2013 8:29:21 AM

I was only 17 when I graduated. I started kindergarten when I was 4 .
As did I.


-Angela
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