Do you have a sibling you do not see/speak to?

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Posted 11/9/2013 by CrankyPea in NSBR Board
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CrankyPea
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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:40:46 PM
I don't communicate with my oldest sister. There was never really one big thing that happened, I think she probably tried harder than I did, but over the years there were lots of little hurts and incidents and now we just don't have any use for each other. She lives in another state, so it's easy to keep the distance, and would be hard to change things even if we wanted to, which honestly I don't think either of us really wants bad enough. When she comes to see my mother, it's not like we can't be in the same room together or anything. But still it makes me a little sad.

So that's my sob story. I was looking at old photo albums today and that made me think about this. Anyone else have a sibling they don't have much to do with?


Angie

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*KelleeM*
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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:48:51 PM
Yup. My sister who is two years older than me. Her choice and I'm okay with it. There are seven siblings...I'm close to most of them and would be happy to spend time with any except her.





Luvnlifelady
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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:51:15 PM
Yes, my older brother. It's been 8 years since we last spoke. Everyone still talks to him but I don't. I finally came out with something he had done to me while I was younger and that was the end of the relationship since he denied it.

Kind of sad since he doesn't have kids and was a fun uncle but I really couldn't keep up the facade anymore.

My oldest sister and I barely talk. We are the only two siblings (out of 5) that had kids but she's 8 years older, so we don't have a ton in common. She was always condescending to me and doesn't respect my decision to be a SAHM. She doesn't have much a relationship with most of our family though.




S_cR_aP_Booker
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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:52:12 PM
I have a half sister that is my only sibling that I no longer speak to. It was her decision. I have gone above and beyond to try and build back our relationship, but she chooses to ignore me.

I won't lie. I miss her, but I am not going to put up with her craziness anymore.

*maureen*
Bad Wolf

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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:54:53 PM
Yes, I have a sister that I haven't spoken to since Christmas 2001. She has made poor choices with her life and is a danger to be around.


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CarbLover443
BucketHead

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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:57:50 PM
I have a half sister who is nuts. Has a gimme gimme mentality and feels everyone owes her. I called her out on a few things and she got mad and cut off contact. Can't say I miss her.

I have learned that sometimes you are better off splitting from someone and admiring them/missing them from afar because their issues wreaking havoc on your life isn't worth it.






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Leopardmama
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Posted: 11/9/2013 12:58:45 PM
Yes, I don't speak to my oldest sister. It's been almost 2 years and its her fault. She decided to hit me because I was trying to discipline my step-daughter at my sons b-day party. I feel sad we don't talk but her behavior that day was unreal! I am expecting an apology one day but until then, we won't be talking.

psoccer
PeaNut

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Posted: 11/9/2013 1:03:42 PM
I do, I don't really talk with my brother. We never had a huge fight, but slowly grew apart. We really grew apart as my parents have gotten older. He is adamant that my parents sell their home and move into a care facility. My mom is still able to drive, she just passed the test this year. She can cook, clean, and do simple yard work. Sometimes she tells me the same story, but she doesn't have much going on. My dad is in the early stages of dementia, but has a caretaker come in to help him get dressed and to watch him so that my mom can run errands by herself, or watch him while they all do errands together. My dad is still sharp mentally, but has difficulty walking due to low blood pressure, and is prone to falling. They are about 90 minutes away, my husband stays with them twice a week, due to his commute, and I go up at least once a week in the summer, and every other week once school starts. My brother is the same distance, but comes up every couple of months. My parents wish is to stay in their home, but my brother wants them to sell and move, and he has had strong words to me, and to my parents, regarding my parents wish, so we really have a wedge between us. I do get envious of other people that do things with their siblings, and I really hope my children stay close.

Peasville
PeaNut

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Posted: 11/9/2013 1:05:33 PM
I haven't spoken to my only living brother for over 4 years. His (former) best friend is my DSO and he "doesn't approve" of his little sister dating/living with his friend.

Before this, we hadn't spoken for about 8 years because when my mom passed away, he got mad a my dad and didn't have anything to do with us. I looked him up when my dad passed away and we tried to kindle a relationship, but when DSO and I got together, he hair flipped. He contacted me about 2 years ago via text and asked if DSO was still around. When I told him yes, he called me an idiot and hasn't spoken to me since.

At this point, even if he tried, I'd most likely not return the sentiment. It's his loss. He's missing out on being an uncle to my DS and all our family does.


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lje
BucketHead

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Posted: 11/9/2013 1:28:28 PM
I have an older brother that decided he didn't want anything to do with me, my younger brother, and my parents. He has always felt that he and his kids haven't been treated fairly and there are several incidents that he has been hanging on to for years. We didn't talk for several years. When my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer a year ago, I called him many times and left messages before he called me back. He has come back into my mom and dad's life some...but on his terms. 3 months ago he was diagnosed with lung and brain cancer and is now going through chemo and radation. My mom and dad have been there for him through it all, despite him not being so nice to them. We have always had to tread lightly around him. So sad.....

mlana
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Posted: 11/9/2013 1:33:28 PM
My brother and I aren't estranged, we just don't have much in common. There have been times we've actually been estranged and not speaking because I wouldn't put up with his mess, but that hasn't happened in a long time.

For years we communicated mostly thru his wife, then she flipped out and left. DB reached out to me when he was going thru his divorce, and I supported him, but then we drifted apart again. He was in a motorcycle accident a few years ago, and, again, I supported him, but, again, we drifted apart.

There isn't any animosity, just lack of a real connection, a reason besides blood relation to talk to each other. I'm also not close with my dad and lives with my brother, so I'm not particularly anxious to increase our visits. He knows I'm here if he needs me, and I know I could call on him and he'd be here.

Marcy



NativeNewYorker
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:01:28 PM
Yes, but I'm ok with it.


Staci
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mdoc
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:04:53 PM
I have five siblings and I'm not close to any of them, geographically or emotionally. We're all Facebook friends, and we'd have no problem being in the same room together or anything (there are no hard feelings and we always have a good time on the rare occasions when we're together), but I don't actually speak with or see any of them more than once every couple years. Getting together and staying in touch just isn't a priority for any of us.

Lesleyanne~
BucketHead

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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:17:52 PM
I have an estranged older brother. He didn't come when our mom was dying and treated our dad like $hit during her last week of life. We have little use for each other I guess. We didn't have a blow-out or anything, it just happened.



stittsygirl
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:31:43 PM
I have three brothers who I haven't seen or talked to in nearly three years. We're just not close, emotionally or geographically. One was really offended when I left the LDS church, and they are all very reserved around me now when we do see each other.






Kristen, lucky mom and proud retired Army wife!




RedSquirrel
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:40:38 PM
My only brother lives with my mother, 120 miles from me and my husband. We haven't fallen out, but he only calls me when he wants something, which has been about a handful of times in our lives. He only speaks to me to tease or put me down. He's been the same all our adult lives, as if his relationship with his sister got stuck at a mental age of 13. It used to bother me but it's just the way he is. He's more communicative with my DH, but DH finds him extremely exasperating. I suppose he would be given a label of "social skills problem" these days.

I do worry what will happen after my mother's days though, whether it will still only be me calling him occasionally and having one-sided, mono-syllabic "duty" calls.

deesquared
BucketHead

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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:47:38 PM
Yes, my oldest sister.
She was always a major b***h, her whole life.
When we were young, she treated all of us, including my mom, like trash.
She would tell us to 'drop dead' and f-off if things weren't to her liking.
If anyone called her on her nasty behaviour, she would fly off the handle, and get even more pissy.
My other sisters and my mom have put up with her awfulness for years, pussy-footing around her so as not to make waves.
She has ruined every family get-together from Christmas dinners, family bbq's, etc. At our cousin's wedding, she was pissed off that she had to sit with us, and not at the head table with the Italian cousins. She always maintains that she is 'more' Italian than the rest of us, though I don't know how she comes to that conclusion. She spent the whole reception sitting with her chair turned away from the table so she wouldn't have to socialize with us. What a cow....
The last straw for me was when she ruined my youngest sister's wedding by being a complete b**ch the entire time. She was just a total grump to everyone and it was so embarassing. She then ruined the party the next day by showing up and telling me to f-off when I asked her if she was going to be nasty again.
I completely lost it, told her what I thought of her, and she is no longer welcome in my home or anywhere near my children.
She is a bitter old maid, in her 40s with no boyfriend, husband, children or home of her own. She is reaping what she has spend decades sowing, and she deserves every bit of it.
I have no regrets about cutting her out of my life. She is toxic to everyone around her, especially family. I'm much happier not having to deal with her craziness.

pretzels
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:51:41 PM
Yes. My younger sister. She is 11 years younger than me, and her life is a freaking mess. She blames her mess on the fact that she's trying to measure up to me or some such crap. She's also a diagnosed bipolar who refuses to stay medicated. So I just don't mess with her.

msbee
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Posted: 11/9/2013 2:54:37 PM
Yep.

I have a sister who I won't have anything to do with due to her refusal to take responsibility for her part in what happened to her kids. I was cordial, but distant, when all of us kids got together for mt brothers wedding.



merrick
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:04:05 PM
my brother and i aren't that close but i try. my SIL is nuts and wish we could cut her out but she's great to my kids and i would never suggest that to my DH. i am polite but keep her at arm's length.

my bff has 9 siblings. the youngest brother has not been in contact with any of them or the parents for 16 years. i cannot imagine but she says no drama, he just never felt like he fit in, no matter how hard any of them tried. she is pretty sure there is some undiagnosed mental illness.

kimberly38
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:27:05 PM
Yes, I only have one brother.

He is married and my niece is 19.

My youngest child is in therapy, (depression and anxiety issues) and when she started goinh to therapy, it came out that my niece had done some things not appropriate. No clothing was ever removed, but some kissing on the belly and "dry humping". My daughter was 6-8, (she is almost now 15), and my niece is about four years older.

Niece denied it. Her parents believe her. As they should. I have no problem with that. But, some of the things that my brother said about me, my husband, my family. No way.

My daughter states she is telling the truth. Honestly, in this instance, my daughter was not upset with the deed(s) so to speak. She is upset that my niece is lying and will not admit to what happened.

There is a lot more back story, we were never really close to begin with.

I see my brother occasionally because my mom lives with me on an addition to my home, but we hardly talk, if at all. My mother is in ill health, so I know, at some poing, our paths will cross.

But, there will never be a relationship of any kind ever again.

ireneR
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:29:17 PM
I have No Contact with my entire family (parents, siblings). Although at first it was difficult thru holidays, celebrations, etc. it has made my life happier and less stressful. I can't be in a toxic relationship even if we are related!


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Mary Kay Lady
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:30:00 PM

Yes. I'm one of 5 kids and we were raised in an abusive disfunctional home. I don't have a relationship with any of my siblings. It makes me sad. I get jelous of people who have close relationships with their siblings, but in my case it's just not possible.

I have some "adopted" sisters who I love. We have fun together and they are loving and supportive. Everything that my bio siblings are not.



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_Kristi_
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:33:23 PM
I have 2 half siblings.

My brother has made poor choices his whole life (drugs/jail). I haven't really known him in over 15 years. We are in different states & there is no contact.

My sister & I are very different. We didn't have a falling out or anything - just nothing in common & different values. We are also in different states so I never run into her.

I do hear about both if them from another sister that I am close to.

NLGuy
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:40:23 PM
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SarahYoo
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Posted: 11/9/2013 3:51:56 PM
Yes, my younger sister. She is 7 years younger than me. Even if we lived in the same country, we didn't really speak to each other, and we don't have anything in common. She lived at home until she was 30, has never had a full time job, and lives on welfare benefits. She thinks that if she waits long enough the perfect job will find her. Meanwhile, her and her unemployed boyfriend have just adopted a puppy. Her status updates on Facebook leave me shaking my head, but if I say anything to her, she would just ignore it, or put some passive aggressive statement on Facebook. She only contacts me on if she wants me to look for craft stuff for her.

I have a younger brother too, who also lives in another country, but I speak to him via Skype on a regular basis, and he and my SIL came to visit over the summer. We both can't understand our sister's behaviour, especially as both of us worked part-time jobs from the age of 13 (we each had a newspaper delivery round) and our parents expected that of us - but made an exception for our sister for reasons we are not entirely sure of.


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TXDancermom
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Posted: 11/9/2013 4:03:03 PM
I did. I spoke to my sister usually only at Christmas when she would be at our dad's for the holidays. that or if she really needed something from me.

It was easier on me to keep it that way, I (and others) didn't understand how she could live like she did and every encounter with her was a chore, nothing pleased her and she lived in the past.

It seems like she alienated everyone in her life, she had no friends. After she died, and I had her mail forwarded to my house, there was no personal mail that was received, only bills.

sunluver
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Posted: 11/9/2013 4:22:39 PM
Yes, I have younger brother that decided about 30 yrs ago, he no longer wanted anything to do with our family. Nobody knows why. There wasn't any big blow up, nothing. He just kind of disappeared and stopped communicating. My other brother and I are fine without him around. It's harder on Mom, especially when Dad was dying. Missing brother was informed by an Uncle who knew where he was about Dad dying, but he never even picked up the phone to call. I'll never forgive him for that.

mishkismom
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Posted: 11/9/2013 4:26:33 PM
I actually have 4 half sisters that I don't speak to. Their mother really did a job on them by leaving them when they were young. None of them have any close fiends, family ect. Just their own husbands.

The youngest is 11 years older than me and the oldest is 25 years older so that had a tiny bit of impact but they are really anti social and completely F'd up IMO.


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Darkangel090260
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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:00:26 PM
Ya my older brother K, He has messed up his life to the point of no return. Drug/Drinking, jail/prison time ect. My mom put up with it but i cant deal with he anymore. We are a 180 degrees different however most of my life I get the blamed for stuff he has done or his friend have done.

i moved to New York state 3 weeks later my mom house get broken in to. Try to say it was one of my friend. When I lived there i never had anyone in there part of the house and since they just when for her jewelry and nothing ells it had to be someone who has been upstairs. if they where my friends or people I know they would have been looking for computers.


I have quite a few learing disabilitys that effect my spelling a grammer. I do know my grammer and spelling suck. I have been working on this problem all my adult life.

Luvnlifelady
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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:13:20 PM
I forgot to add that I barely talk to the sister that lives with me (she's 53). She has chosen the life of the victim and it's just disgusting.

She was on unemployment for two years. Not a single interview and barely trying to find work. She didn't take any classes to update any office skills or anything. Now that unemployment ran out, she relies on my 78 year old, widowed mother to pay her rent to me. Ugh.

She has no car, money (but is on food stamps), life, or anything so she is here nearly 24/7. Drives me nuts. I have told her that I don't want to talk to her since she is toxic but every time I try to go downstairs for something, she tries to talk to me about the most random crap. I'm over it.



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AncestralPea

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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:26:00 PM
OP I could have written your post with a few minor changes. I feel the same way especially when I see women who enjoy a close relationship with their sister. But, it is what it is.

dresdendoll
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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:33:56 PM
I am number 4 of seven siblings. We all seven are very close. That does not mean that we agree on everything all the time. We don't. We all have very different personalities and opinions on just about everything, however, we have over the years " agreed to disagree" and not let it affect our sibling relationships. We have a deep respect and love for each other. We all been through a lot in our lives and have always continuted that bond somehow. And for that I am extremely grateful. Our parents instilled in each of us from day one to cherish your family because one day their spot at the dinner table may be empty forever. That always stayed with me and so far we are all here and cherish each other greatly.

Inkerbelle
BucketHead

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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:56:37 PM
Yes, my younger sister. Her controlling, take over, superior attitude had me slowly drift apart away from her until there was no need to be together. I'm okay with it, it's been thirty years since we've seen each other. She has her life and I have mine.

marycain
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Posted: 11/9/2013 5:59:06 PM
I'm the youngest of ten. Four of my brothers are deceased. I'm close to both my sisters, but rarely see or talk to one of my brothers. No falling out or hard feelings; we just don't have anything in common other than being siblings. He's 17 years older, divorced, and doesn't like children or animals, so he's very uncomfortable visiting us. We're on opposite ends of the political spectrum, and are of different faiths, so our conversations tend to be fairly superficial to avoid any hot button issues.

CrankyPea
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Posted: 11/9/2013 6:25:29 PM

OP I could have written your post with a few minor changes.
In so many of these posts, it's clear why the people don't want do deal with that person. But I almost think it's harder when there is nothing really wrong/crazy/toxic about the sibling you're not close to. Like you can't point to something and say, "I can't deal with her because of .... X. " It's not all her fault. It's not all mine. It just is.


Angie

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I don't care." Dave Barry

jerseygirlanne
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Posted: 11/9/2013 7:34:33 PM
I had an older brother who lead a troubled life...drugs, jail etc. We were total opposites. I was the "good" child and he was always in trouble. He was a mess yet my parents always treated him well. He felt like they loved me more. We put an addition on our house so that my parents would be taken care of in their later years. He was always jealous of me and my family and accused me of using his inheritance to build the addition. We were never close. He ended up taking his own life at the age of 58...so, so sad and my mom has never gotten over it. I always wanted a sister until I saw how my three SIL don't get along.


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StuckOnPeas

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Posted: 11/9/2013 7:43:50 PM
My husband has not talked to his half brother in years. There was an issue involving my FIL and FIL doesn't even talk to him. We all live in the same county.


Karen

MergeLeft
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Posted: 11/9/2013 8:21:59 PM
We're not completely estranged, but my brother and I don't see each other very often and we're both fine with that. We're just very different people and it seems any time we are together there is some kind of disagreement or misunderstanding that leaves a bad taste in everyone's mouth.


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Lexica

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Posted: 11/9/2013 8:33:05 PM
Yes, my older sister. She and I have never been particularly close, but we were able to attend the same functions and have a surface relationship without causing a scene. I just made sure I wasn't in a room with her by myself.

When my father passed away, many many things came to light about her mistreatment of my parents, but mostly her mistreatment of my Mom. She was continually mean to my mom, but with my father alive, he was the buffer. She wouldn't say much with my dad in the room, and Mom never told my father how bad it really was for her.

I also learned this sister had been snooping into my younger sister's email. My younger sister wouldn't have anything in her email to be ashamed of, BUT my older sister's daughter confided some very personal things to my younger sis that she could not share with her mom. That is what I was very concerned she would find, so I felt I had no other choice than to warn the younger sister that her email was being read.

I felt very uncomfortable in doing so, but I felt I had to protect my niece's privacy because I knew at least one topic she was sharing and my oldest sister would have really caused some extreme trouble for my niece, possibly even leading her mother to cut her off both physically and financially.

There are many more reasons, but those were the biggest for me. My younger sister also stopped talking to her and, for a while, my mom thought she might have to move her things out of that sister's home to live with me full time. I would have welcomed that and told her so, but eventually my oldest sister realized that Mom was willing to move in with me and she didn't want people to think she was a bad daughter so she pressured Mom into including her in Mom's moving rotation between all three daughters.

It took me a few months to build up my mom's self esteem and confidence in herself and admit that she was the victim of elder abuse while living there. At first she was very nervous to have to stay with that sister again, but I told her I would come and get her out of there any time of the day or night. The oldest sister now realized that she lost her siblings and was very close to losing her mother, so she backed off and Mom says she treats her entirely different now. Not great, but much better.

She still has little patience for Mom, but she has stopped the majority of her ways since Mom stood up to her and told her I would come get her if she needed it.

So yeah, I definitely have a sibling I no longer speak to. I expect some grief from her after Mom passes away and she learns Mom changed her will to have me be the executor since my oldest sister is not trustworthy. After all is divided and dispersed, I don't expect to ever hear from her again.

My youngest sister feels as I do, but with a lot of anger in there due to being spyed upon and a few other things that sister has pulled on her. I wouldn't be surprised to see them get into it if they ever see each other.

scorPEAo
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 181,836
December 2004
Posts: 5,651
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Loc: YouSeeDavis

Posted: 11/9/2013 8:35:54 PM
I have a younger sister who I don't really like. I tolerate her because she's family, and I'm nice to her, but I don't go out of my way to have contact with her. She is just very selfish and entitled, and I have a hard time biting my tongue. I've found it's just better to not have much interaction with her.



yivit
I thought this was an autonomous collective

PeaNut 159,210
July 2004
Posts: 10,482
Layouts: 3
Loc: Houston

Posted: 11/9/2013 10:39:05 PM
I've only seen or spoken to my middle sister (I'm the eldest of 3 girls and a much younger brother) twice in the past several years. She showed up for our grandma's 90th birthday a couple of years ago. She also showed up at Christmas Eve at our grandma's last year - with her SO in tow.

The back story: Her house burned down several years ago (lightning hit the barn and the wind blew the flames into the house). While the house was paid off and they seemed to always have a new vehicle or jet ski or motorcycle, they couldn't be bothered to have insurance on the house, so they had no way to rebuild (or any of the other types of assistance that come with a policy). One of their friends (her, her DH and their DS) took them in since he had an efficiency apartment on his property in the same area. She decided that she would rather be with this guy than her DH and DS and left *them* while all of them were all still living there. She got pissed off at us (the whole family) because we wouldn't just hand her cash to clear the land or rebuild (although we all were ready to set up accounts at Home Depot or wherever and pay for dumpster service, etc. to help out - none of us trusted her (for good reason) to use cash for rebuilding). She got more pissed off when we kept contact with her now-ex (um, our grandson/nephew/great-grandson was with him, duh).

Even though she was behaving like a raving lunatic, I was willing to set that aside for our grandma's sake. Since she couldn't be bothered to come by, call, or even attend my DH's memorial service in September, I don't think I can even be in the same house as her if she shows up this year.



If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln

sunny_day
BucketHead

PeaNut 138,856
March 2004
Posts: 978
Layouts: 12
Loc: Chicago West Suburbs

Posted: 11/9/2013 11:03:00 PM
My brother is two years older than me. We have never been really close. He's super quiet and doesn't talk much. He comes to family events but kinda hides out in another room or goes off and plays with the kids. He'll say hi or answer a question I ask in a monosyllabic way. We don't really talk much. I wish we were closer, but he's just kinda a loner.

Bumpea
PeaAddict

PeaNut 487,882
November 2010
Posts: 1,346
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/9/2013 11:45:12 PM
Yep. Five of them. They're all half-siblings. Had kids of their own by the time I was born. We were never close and I felt hated by most of them the whole of my growing up.

After my mom died, all pretense that we were 'family' died, too.

It's been almost 25 years since I've seen or heard from any of them. I imagine some have died by now. I'll probably never know.


L

theshyone
I'm Alive!

PeaNut 266,636
June 2006
Posts: 11,036
Layouts: 37
Loc: Alberta

Posted: 11/9/2013 11:56:51 PM
I'm from a very dysfunctional family.

The sister 9 years older than me is immersed in the world of drugs and alcohol. Only time we ever see or hear from her is if she is doing a program. She doesn't even know I had sudden cardiac arrests over a year ago or that it's a genetic condition.

The sister 10 years older than me has hated me all my life. I owe her nothing.

The sister 11 years older than me walked into our lives about 6 years ago without us ven knowing she existed. She thinks she was so hard done by having been given to a loving family for adoption as a newborn.

Once my mom passes there will be no family.


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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world. Jack Layton


Margeux
BucketHead

PeaNut 219,867
August 2005
Posts: 894
Layouts: 5

Posted: 11/10/2013 12:07:30 AM
We are 22 months apart, both in our mid 40s, and my brother has hated me since I was 5. It's sad. I still try. It's taken me 20 years to realize, he's just an arse!


**Margeux**



merlot1024
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 55,742
November 2002
Posts: 2,037
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/10/2013 12:58:02 AM
Yes. My older sister and I do not speak. I so wish I had a sister I was close to. She and I have nothing in common. She and her dh don't hold down jobs, he is a total pothead who can't complete a sentence without the f word. We are polar opposites.

The straw that broke the camel's back was my dad's funeral. We were back at the house and BIL and my mom got into it. They were both wrong but he ended up cussing my mother out and my sister backed him up. I felt very strongly that she should not have allowed him to speak to our mother that way even if my mom was being difficult. It was her husband's funeral. I never would have let my husband talk to my mom that way and I would never speak to his mom that way.

It makes me sad because my sister has a son that's 6 months older than my oldest daughter and he is awesome. I miss him and knowing what's going on in his life.


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CMRA
PeaNut

PeaNut 577,483
January 2013
Posts: 136
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/10/2013 1:09:36 AM
I don't speak to my younger sister and have no relationship with my brother.

Their lifestyle choices are an issue. My brother is working on getting his life together. My sister is not and due to her latest chaos, she is unwelcome in my home. She needs serious counseling but sticks to her ways.

It makes me sad but I've tried and everyone makes their own choices. I choose to shelter my children from the madness.
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pas2
BucketHead

PeaNut 28,462
January 2002
Posts: 542
Layouts: 0
Loc: PA

Posted: 11/10/2013 4:15:44 AM
Yes

My oldest brother was a cruel kid and abusive yet felt entitled because he was the oldest. My sister and I chose not to talk or be around him unless it was unavoidable. My parents even cut him out of their will because of his attitude (they never knew about the abuse).
He died suddenly recently and instead of sadness I actually felt relief. I do regret that this affected my relationship with his wife whom I really liked, she is such a warm hearted person.

With my other brother it's been an on/off relationship depending on if he perceived some slight (due to his ex-wife's influence). He is remarried to a very friendly, nice woman and we actually visit/talk. I am enjoying this new found friendship with him immensely since I really missed having him around.

Miss Cleo
StuckOnPeas

PeaNut 55,258
November 2002
Posts: 2,418
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/10/2013 7:11:00 AM


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