Who else has a small drama-free Thanksgiving?

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Posted 11/28/2013 by Monklady123 in NSBR Board
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Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 475,028
July 2010
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Loc: Northern VA

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:07:33 AM
I'm sorry for those of you who have family drama at the holidays.

Before we had kids dh and I alternated families for the holidays -- Thanksgiving with my parents, Christmas with his, then the next year we switched. I think we took ds for a year or two but not after that. Dh said he wanted his kids to have Christmas in their own homes because he remembered being dragged all over creation (large Irish Catholic family) when he was a kid. That was just fine with me, and my parents didn't care. They just want to see us at some point, but if it was the week after Christmas they were happy with that. I figured dh could deal with his mother, especially since it was his idea to begin with that we not travel. lol

So it's just the four of us and the dog. For a few years dh's brother lived here so he came, sometimes with a current girl friend. My sister lives in DC but she goes home to our parents for Thanksgiving and comes to us for Christmas. This year my dog is inviting a friend over for dinner. hehehehe We're taking care of her while the owners are away and my dd didn't want her spending the day alone. lol.

So here we are. Calm, peaceful, no drama. I don't like to cook but really Thanksgiving is easy when you're living with a bunch of non-gourmands. Stove Top stuffing, mashed potatoes (from scratch, thank you very much ), pie with store-bought crust, the turkey isn't much trouble...some kind of green vegetable probably green beans since everyone likes them.

Someone will no doubt watch football, I'll play online while I'm cooking, we'll go out in an hour to watch a local Turkey Trot that goes right by my house....that's it.

Tell me about your drama-free holiday.

pea'rific teacher Union President

PeaNut 164,125
August 2004
Posts: 23,833
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Loc: Western NY

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:14:00 AM
Our holidays are always drama free....always. I cringe when I read some of the crap that goes on with peas' families. Makes me thankful for mine.

Today we ---my parents and I---are headed to my cousin's house. My two brothers are doing today with their inlaws. My cousin's wife lost both parents within the last three months and will be sorely missed today. There will be 9 of us....we will reminisce about Bob and Anne and how they are so badly missed today.

Some people only dream of angels, I have held one in my arms.


PeaNut 498,237
February 2011
Posts: 3,407
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Loc: SW

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:25:08 AM
Not much drama here. We will have 1 senior entering dementia who won't wear his depends but we will try to get those on.

We have a couple other families coming, all who are not attending their family meal because of drama.


PeaNut 370,566
April 2008
Posts: 1,459
Layouts: 0
Loc: Minnesota

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:25:33 AM
Quiet day here. We are finally going to get the leaves picked up. This is the first day all of us has had off to get it done.

My Dad called last night and said the plans he had got changed and asked if he would still come over -- I said of course.

With just Dad coming over I don't stress about my house being spotless.He does not expect a grandiose(sp) meal; meat, potatoes and stuffing and he is happy.

I would love to have my sisters join us, but they have made the choice to be with just their family so I let it go.

It is the same thing at Christmas - just my family and Dad.


PeaNut 536,949
January 2012
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Loc: The middle of the middle of nowhere

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:52:26 AM
Very quiet and drama free day here. It's just us (DH, myself, my mom who lives with us and youngest DS). Oldest DS is with his dad and grandparents for the weekend, so we won't actually do our "real" thanksgiving dinner until Sunday when he gets back.
DH is out hunting, I've got a cake in the oven...we're going to the community thanksgiving dinner where DS#2 is volunteering (I would but I have a broken ankle and can't stand that much!) Tonight we'll come home and have movie night...
No black Friday plans, just plans to enjoy a quiet evening resting my foot and relaxing with my loved ones...
We could have had drama...but I chose NO! and for that, I'm thankful!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!


PeaNut 220
April 1999
Posts: 3,815
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Loc: Upstate NY

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:54:09 AM
Hubby is deployed so we had our chat last night while he ate his MRE. I got up at 5 to start the pork roast for our annual Thanksgiving tamales. My three girls all pitch in and we make them together while listening/watching movies. I really do love these quiet stress free holidays.

However I do miss my family terribly, especially my mama. Her driving me batty, amping the stress level up trying to get the food on the table in time. LoL Goodness how much I hated that and how I'd give anything to see her vibrant driving me crazy self again.

Enjoy your day and enjoy that precious time with your families.



PeaNut 407,137
January 2009
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Loc: New Jersey

Posted: 11/28/2013 6:59:21 AM
Blissfully drama free here. I't just DH and the kids and I so we don't have a tight schedule. No one gets worked up over any of it. It's always a very relaxed day here.


Helen *Mc
Gone Walkabout

PeaNut 4,068
April 2000
Posts: 10,438
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Loc: Aussie in SC. USA

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:03:15 AM
Ours are pretty well drama free and always have been. There's just the 4 of us. Dh's parents were older and passed on when we were in our early 20's, within 3 years of us being married. My family is in another country, so either way, it wouldn't have been the deal with inlaws etc that others may have.

This year dds boyfriend is coming over, so my biggest drama is not having any 'special' holiday dinnerware or a decent table cloth lol!

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Peaing From Podunk

PeaNut 45,443
August 2002
Posts: 16,554
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Loc: North Dakota

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:07:09 AM
No drama here. It's just my brother, my DD and SIL, my 2 grandsons, my late DH's nephew and myself.


Mother Goose's Meandering Mind


PeaNut 157,667
July 2004
Posts: 4,403
Layouts: 15
Loc: Upstate NY

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:10:17 AM
Drama free here. My daughter's fiancé has a larger family to coordinate, so I just have her let me know if they are eating early or late, then I'll host the opposite. They usually do around 1 pm, so we'll have ours late. Poor kids eating two dinners. LOL


PeaNut 187,030
January 2005
Posts: 2,098
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Loc: Eastern Shores of Mobile Bay

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:12:04 AM
Just two of us so drama free. Spent the night at the beach and going home to cook a turkey breast with simple fixings.

Don't ever remember a drama-filled holiday

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PeaNut 588,353
May 2013
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Posted: 11/28/2013 7:16:44 AM
The only drama here is that one of the dogs helped herself to an entire loaf of bread so there will be less stuffing for the five of us.

I teach, therefore I am a teacher

PeaNut 25,495
December 2001
Posts: 9,463
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Loc: Stuck in the 80's

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:19:09 AM
Ours is always drama free.

Thanksgiving is at my house every year. Mil comes and helps me however I need once she gets here.

This year my brother is out of state for training, so his family is going to his mil's. my father isnt coming because my brother won't be here.

So, we invited a dear friend and her family. Her mother just moved out of town. I am really looking forward to it.

"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome." Hope Floats


PeaNut 4,089
April 2000
Posts: 1,312
Layouts: 0
Loc: DE

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:22:45 AM
Our holidays have always been drama free thank goodness. I usually have Thanksgiving and Christmas and just do a head count about 2 weeks iin advance to see who is coming and who has other plans.

Today it will just be me, DH, my dad and DB and SIL. We'll go visit mom at the convelesant home then come back here for dinner. DS and his fiancé have tickets for the Ravens game tonight so they will come down tomorrow. They're cooking their first Thanksgiving for her family and burning up my phone LOL.

I just go with the flow and if someone else offers to do the holiday at their house one year I silently yell YES!!!!, offer to bring a dish and happily drive to wherever.


PeaNut 183,117
January 2005
Posts: 3,838
Layouts: 24
Loc: Middle of the USA

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:23:11 AM
I'll tell you tonight!

Just kidding! We cut out the drama about 12 years ago ... We have good friends and good family over now instead of obligations. I realized just because we're family, we don't have to spend time with you.

Works like a charm!


Oh good...the world needs more bee keepers.

PeaNut 27,167
January 2002
Posts: 11,149
Layouts: 21
Loc: Just barely on the edge of reason in Allen, Tx

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:30:10 AM
I love spending Thanksgiving with my family, but it just did not work out this year. So it is just dh, ds, dsd and myself and that will be just fine too. We are going to eat our gratefulness meal around 1:00pm and then spend the rest of the day decorating the Christmas tree!

Motto of a powerful woman:

Live your life in such a way that when you get up in the morning and your feet hit the floor...Satan shudders and says "Oh shit...she's awake!"


PeaNut 401,157
November 2008
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Loc: Virginia is for Lovers

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:34:30 AM

Drama free here. My daughter's fiance has a larger family to coordinate, so I just have her let me know if they are eating early or late, then I'll host the opposite. They usually do around 1 pm, so we'll have ours late. Poor kids eating two dinners. LOL

That's pretty much the most stress we go through during the holidays, coordinating which house is going to host feast #1, and then try not to do too much damage so we can make it through feast #2.

Here's to keeping the peace for Thanksgiving! Is it too early for a cocktail?


Pride of the Peas

PeaNut 25,575
December 2001
Posts: 19,818
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Loc: Stuck in the Middle With You

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:34:47 AM
As long as my mom isn't here, it is drama free. We have a calm day and often invite someone without family. Our town has fireworks tonight and we have people come over for coffee and pie afterwards.

Proud Wife and Mom to four big goons!
I cannot be old enough to have three teens and a tween.

God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially formed you to
go through it, not without pain but without stain.
-- C. S. Lewis

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PeaNut 595,029
September 2013
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Posted: 11/28/2013 7:48:23 AM
There are twenty five of us, but no drama. We all get along and like to spend time with each other. There are three turkeys, more side dishes than people, and at least one ugly pie.

I am getting ready to head over to my moms, who lives next door to her sister. We will drift back and forth all day, and sit for dinner at my aunts. The only drama will be what dessert to choose.


PeaNut 276,270
September 2006
Posts: 577
Layouts: 10

Posted: 11/28/2013 7:58:41 AM
Calm here too. It is just me, my husband, his mom and our 2 boys (ages 15 & 9). My MIL and I are not close. She is always on the couch watching football with my husband. I cook it all and wash all the dishes afterwards...no one helps....stinkers. I'm actually pretty lonely because it is all boys and sports.....I'm the only girly-girl around here....but it's all good. I am very thankful for my boys!


Miss Ang
I'm a Toilet Paper Pea. Are you?

PeaNut 26,443
January 2002
Posts: 12,621
Layouts: 398
Loc: Illinois

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:04:13 AM
We are lucky enough to have both sets of parents within a mile of us; actually dh's parents live across the street. Our holidays are drama free. However, we don't get together with a lot of family outside of our parents and siblings (and their families, of course). My dad's parents and brother have all passed away but if we were to get together with my mom's mom and her sisters ... well, THAT would be drama. But we know that so we just don't do it.

Lunch today will be our family of 4 with dh's parents, one of his brothers and his wife and kids and two aunts (not married; no kids).

Dinner tonight will be with my parents (without my dd, she has to work. ) and my sister and her girls.

That's it. The only stress will be my mom cooking way too many dishes trying to make every single persons very favorite. I keep telling her that she doesn't have to do that, but she insists.



PeaNut 511,446
June 2011
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Loc: Saint Louis

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:12:01 AM
No drama here either. Going to a small family gathering at my sister's. Just seven adults, mimosas, wine, food and games.
I just have to finish making the cranberry salad.

It will be a good day!

froggy one

PeaNut 479,242
August 2010
Posts: 2,520
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Loc: In my own mind

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:15:00 AM
Quite drama free here. Dad moved into a veterans home a few months ago. The staff made dinner for some selected patients yesterday and he was invited. Today is another one for all.

One ds is woorking and the other is at the new inlaws. I am making Cornish game hens for DH and then football!



PeaNut 155,589
July 2004
Posts: 3,230
Layouts: 81
Loc: San Diego, CA

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:39:38 AM
No drama here, except for whatever my 13 year old DD might decide to dish out. We live 3,000 miles away from our family, and I detest traveling over the holidays, so it's just the 3 of us. This year, we decided to spend the holiday weekend at a fantastic resort an hour away from home, so I won't even have to cook. I can just focus on how much I have to be thankful for.


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"Where I'm from, we believe all sorts of things that aren't true. We call it - 'history'." -- The Wizard, Wicked

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PeaNut 407,137
January 2009
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Loc: New Jersey

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:43:00 AM

The only drama here is that one of the dogs helped herself to an entire loaf of bread so there will be less stuffing for the five of us.

That's a tragedy. The stuffing is my favorite part of the meal.



PeaNut 263,868
June 2006
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Loc: South Alabama

Posted: 11/28/2013 8:53:22 AM
I sure hope our day is drama-free. Thankfully, we have a small-ish family, so the day includes up to 3rd and 4th cousins on one side, and aunts and uncles on the other side of my family as well. It's the only time of year that we all get together, and it's always fun and relaxed. We will have a new baby this year, too.

The only possible drama will be that I will be late. I'm going to have to drive about 1 1/2 hours to pick up my sister. She doesn't have a car and was able to find a ride to that point. Of course, I'll be picking her up right about the time that the meal starts. I love her, but that's just so typical of my sister. I only see her twice a year, though, so I'm thankful for a safe vehicle that will accommodate her and my yellow lab-mix "niece". There will be plenty of food left, I just hope that everyone is still there when we arrive.


PeaNut 574,604
December 2012
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Posted: 11/28/2013 9:00:03 AM
It's just us, so it's usually drama free. However, this morning I discovered that my dh -- who did the shopping for me -- forgot to buy gravy. I made no complaints, but simply suggested that I would go out and get it and he's now in full-on sulk/pout mode.


PeaNut 15,108
May 2001
Posts: 3,301
Layouts: 1

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:08:12 AM
We are just having my parents, who are un dramatic, and my nanny, maybe, if she shows (her brother cancelled Thanksgiving dinner). Totally drama free. We used to travel to dh's parents for Thanksgiving, but it involved a plane flight the day before Thanksgiving and a cab ride from Newark into Manhattan in the worst traffic that ever trafficked. When we moved cross-country to an even longer plane flight, we decided to start staying put. It is pretty awesome, I have to say.


PeaNut 386,153
August 2008
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Loc: Friendswood, Texas

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:10:31 AM
We are drama free. Was not always that way, but a few deaths and divorces have removed the people who created the stress. (Not trying to make light of it, we miss these people dearly, but it is what it is)

We are spending today with DH's family and this evening with my sister and her family.


Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 465,849
April 2010
Posts: 5,354
Layouts: 0
Loc: Southern, CA

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:12:43 AM
Yes, drama free this year!!
We are going out to dinner w/SO and his parents this afternoon.

While I was invited to other family members' houses, I am passing this year on their brand of drama. BTDT and not going there again.


Best Cat Evahhh!

PeaNut 18,741
July 2001
Posts: 14,109
Layouts: 200
Loc: Maryland

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:16:02 AM
We used to have alternating dinners at my in-laws house (we alternated Christmas and Tday with his brother...long story). Since my MIL passed away in 2002, we have just the four of us each year. It's generally drama free, but I tend to get over uptight trying for "perfect" which has caused some minor drama in years past. I've been working on that in recent years and I'm much better

I sometimes wish we had a big "to-do" to attend but then I read the family holiday drama filled threads here and once again am happy for my quiet holidays


boring + nerdy

PeaNut 52,817
October 2002
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Layouts: 145
Loc: Oregon

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:20:02 AM
We do. One of the many things I am thankful for!

People not perfection

PeaNut 35,457
April 2002
Posts: 30,024
Layouts: 0
Loc: Right where I should be

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:28:55 AM
We do! We go to my moms 30 mins away and spend 4-5 hours there, share in meal prep, have a great day and than come home. There is usually 8-10 of us there and never drama.

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 34,233
March 2002
Posts: 5,640
Layouts: 100
Loc: MN

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:50:58 AM
Going to my IL's today. It's just the 4 of us, 2 of them, and maybe one or two guests.

No drama. My FIL might say something provocative like during the prayer on the 4th of July "God our country has gone down so far we don't deserve all our freedoms." None of us engage so he stops at one or two comments.

- Renee
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PeaNut 6,447
September 2000
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Loc: Georgia

Posted: 11/28/2013 9:54:47 AM
I'm hoping for one!!

ca angel

PeaNut 400,602
November 2008
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Layouts: 36
Loc: So Cal

Posted: 11/28/2013 11:11:48 AM
We do! I come from a HUGE extended family BUT we don't live near any of them. My Dh comes from a tiny family (1 uncle 3 cousins). There is no expectation to celebrate with DH or my cousins/Aunts/Uncles.

Today we will be going to my IL's house, with DH's brother and my parents. My Bro's family will celebrate Christmas with us, but are at SIL's for Thanksgiving. Small and simple!

The most drama we have is with my BIL, or his SO actually. When he was married we never knew if his wife was going to join us or not. Now he has a girlfriend (for the first time) and we are not sure how she will be included with the holiday celebrations since it is new. She has a couple of kids and some health issues that make it hard for her to commit to events. But we are so happy for him!
ca angel

Happy now?

PeaNut 156,993
July 2004
Posts: 46,562
Layouts: 13
Loc: Connecticut

Posted: 11/28/2013 11:14:48 AM
We're having 13 people and it should be drama free. We're pretty low on the drama scale in this household.


PeaNut 539,539
January 2012
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Posted: 11/28/2013 11:17:04 AM
It's only my immediate family for Thanksgiving and Christmas. We live locally too so there's not even travel drama.

Some of the stories I read on here makes me wonder why more people don't just stick to their immediate families for holidays. Some family members sound down right abusive. I wouldn't put up with it.


PeaNut 370,129
April 2008
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Posted: 11/28/2013 11:21:22 AM
Drama free Thanksgiving here too! Small family gathering this year, but even our larger ones are pretty drama free. Very thankful for that.

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Mary Kay Lady
I'm thinking . . .

PeaNut 367,913
March 2008
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Loc: The state of Confusion!

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:08:13 PM

I'm with you. My house is a drama-free zone. I love it this way. Nice and peaceful. Happy Thanksgiving!



PeaNut 146,748
May 2004
Posts: 4,306
Layouts: 1

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:14:59 PM
here. dd came home she is in her room studying (law student) and dh and i are on line.

You know what grinds my gears?

PeaNut 242,768
January 2006
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Loc: Where the rabbits roam free....

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:15:41 PM
we have no local family, so it's just the 3 of us every year. no drama, easy peasy. a nice relaxed day all day long. I LOVE it.

chatty chatty

PeaNut 120,522
December 2003
Posts: 19,817
Layouts: 546
Loc: San Jose, CA

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:26:45 PM
Mostly. There will be 11 of us. One brother and family are going to SIL's for dinner but is coming by to take the Christmas photo first. If he can show up on time, it will be a completely drama free day.


it rhymes with banana

mom to a 21 yo dd, 14 yo ds, and 11 yo ds and a scrapper for 13 years


PeaNut 506,197
April 2011
Posts: 3,298
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:33:55 PM
No extended family locally, so it's just the 4 of us at Thanksgiving for the past 6 years or so. Very relaxed and drama-free


PeaNut 9,640
January 2001
Posts: 9,044
Layouts: 131
Loc: Deep in the heart of...

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:34:55 PM
Us. Just me, DH, and the kids. Our nearest family members are five hours away, and we're not really close, so it's nice and quiet and peaceful .

Kristen, lucky mom and proud retired Army wife!

What if everything is an illusion & nothing exists

PeaNut 82,319
April 2003
Posts: 15,081
Layouts: 39

Posted: 11/28/2013 12:44:06 PM
No drama here!


PeaNut 170,734
October 2004
Posts: 360
Layouts: 0

Posted: 11/28/2013 1:01:30 PM
Me Me Me! So happy this morning! No drama! Just me, my DH and my kids. We have had a lovely breakfast and we are watching football.

Helen *Mc
Gone Walkabout

PeaNut 4,068
April 2000
Posts: 10,438
Layouts: 214
Loc: Aussie in SC. USA

Posted: 11/28/2013 1:04:35 PM
I think I spoke to soon lol. I'm outside with a glass of wine avoiding the drama or what it could become inside. Dh expected the turkey to go 5 hrs, it took 3. So now everything is off kilter. Dd 1 has decided she is in a bad mood and 'no one needs to know why', but she's being a total bitch. Dd 2 has been in a bad mood since she got up. Since everything is off kilter with food, dh is a little pissy, which has all upset me, because I wanted it to be nice in our new house... And we have our first guest ever coming today, and I have no dishes and one stained table cloth because dh put the good ones somewhere and can't find them.

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Restless Spirit
Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 218,419
August 2005
Posts: 6,279
Layouts: 4

Posted: 11/28/2013 1:09:25 PM
I am happy to report we have been blissfully drama free since all of our parents died.

We are now "the grandparents" and the five of us (DH & I, our daughter and Son-in-law and only grandchild) will have our "feast" around 4 pm at the kid's house, clean-up, then the four of them will head to a hockey game.

I, also blissfully, we go home and spend a quite, Christmas movie filled evening snuggled up on the couch with my 3 dogs.


PEAceful Pea

PeaNut 14,521
April 2001
Posts: 37,572
Layouts: 31
Loc: Washington State

Posted: 11/28/2013 1:14:34 PM
Drama free since 1985.

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