skeevy or not, 40+ year old men going by -y names :Johnny, Tommy, etc

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Posted 5/9/2014 by old pea new name in NSBR Board
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PeaNut 429,768
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Posted: 5/10/2014 9:26:56 AM
My husbands name is JOEY. Everyone calls him Joey and he's 51 AND DEFINITELY NOT SKEEVY!!!!!!

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PeaNut 429,768
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Posted: 5/10/2014 9:29:18 AM
And for that matter my name is Ann Marie and have always been called that but now many people have started calling me Annie - even a singer in a local restaurant who didn't know me sang "Sweet Annie" to me a few weeks ago.


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PeaNut 36,466
April 2002
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Posted: 5/10/2014 9:30:28 AM
My grandpa was named Andrew, but everyone else called him Andy without even asking his preference.

I'm married to a James. People call him Jim, Jimmy, Jimbo without asking his preference either. His mom and older sister still call him Jimmy.

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PeaNut 341,472
October 2007
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Posted: 5/10/2014 10:38:41 AM
I get that people add -y to names without thinking.

I was asking because in my own, limited experience, the people I know don't add a -y when referring to themselves.

And truth be told, this is prompted by one classmate who married a sugar mama, hits on much younger women, and refers to himself as Tommy. So that's where I'm coming from.

Joey seems like a nobrainer. Dave changing to Davey, Tim to Timmy in your late 40's... kind of odd if you just start calling yourself your little boy name.

Like my Sam.... he doesn't go by Sammy and if he did at 40, that would be weird.

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PeaNut 298,090
February 2007
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Posted: 5/10/2014 11:02:36 AM
Well, I guess I'm weird now and..... skeevy.

Coworkers just started using my shortened name as they got to know me. I think it makes "them" feel more comfortable, rather than using a long formal name.
I went with it rather than to constantly make them feel awkward by correcting them;it doesn't really matter to me.

I started referring to myself as Stephi over the years because of it.

I've jumped to the skeevy and weird side. LOL! Damn.


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PeaNut 168,696
September 2004
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Posted: 5/10/2014 11:25:45 AM
Nope- not weird

I changed my name to have a y ending. more fun.

We know lots of men and women with y endings to their names.

totally normal people. really.

Ancient Ancestor of Pea

PeaNut 168,696
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Posted: 5/10/2014 11:29:54 AM
Of course there is always Billy Bob Thornton. he's a great actor, and I don't know what he is like in real life.


PeaNut 478,947
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Posted: 5/10/2014 11:30:46 AM
Not even a blip on the skeevy radar!
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PeaNut 43,034
July 2002
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Posted: 5/10/2014 11:37:24 AM
Did you consider that the "sugar mama" might have a negative association with his "grown up" name and asked him to use the "y" version?

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PeaNut 124,219
January 2004
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Posted: 5/10/2014 12:41:17 PM
Well, they could go by the names Alice or Sue or Ashley.

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PeaNut 22,327
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Posted: 5/10/2014 1:00:48 PM
I think the situation you're describing is a little weird. Most of what people are talking about on here doesn't even relate to what you posted.

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PeaNut 50,618
September 2002
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Posted: 5/10/2014 2:02:25 PM
What janet r said.

Peas are answering a question you didn't ask.


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PeaNut 486,917
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Posted: 5/10/2014 2:22:23 PM
Johnnie (with an ie at that) Walker Red Whiskey

Tommy Hilfiger, Tommy Bahama, Johnny Depp....

it's all good

Magical Pea

PeaNut 62,544
January 2003
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Posted: 5/10/2014 3:11:39 PM
Not specifically a "y" thing, but my ex suddenly shortened his name (changed to a nickname) after the divorce. I do think it is odd, but I also recognize that it is a distancing/reinventing technique. It is a sign of the other issues in his life.


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PeaNut 26,836
January 2002
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Posted: 5/10/2014 3:19:26 PM
Another reason some people switch is because they always preferred that name, but someone close to them wanted them to use another name.

You know, a guy goes by "Teddy", but his girlfriend thinks it's silly and calls him Ted. The girlfriend becomes the wife, later they divorce, and the guy finally goes back to Teddy.

Most instances of this the person's "name change" happened as a kid, but I can see it happening later, too.

Also, did you ever have a name that one person called you and when they were gone, you missed hearing it?

I had a nickname that only 2 people ever called me, and both are gone, now, and sometimes I kind of wish that there was still people out there calling me that.

Perhaps others might wish it enough to actually ask people to use the name.

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PeaNut 18,741
July 2001
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Posted: 5/10/2014 4:24:33 PM
I think "skeevy" is too harsh. And in a lot of cases, not in the control of the person involved. My husband is a Tom, but there are people he's known since childhood who have called him Tommy all those years and just can't call him anything else. He doesn't like it much but it is what it is.


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PeaNut 283,557
November 2006
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Posted: 5/10/2014 10:28:21 PM
If the guy who has been Bill for the last 20 years suddenly started referring to himself as Billy, I'd wonder why and think it odd.

The most likely reason I can see is there were a bunch of Bills at work and he needed to separate himself from Bill W, Bill R, Will A, Will B, and William M, N, & O. which led to the crossover of Billy into his private life.

But still kind of odd - like a midlife crisis.



PeaNut 218,955
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Posted: 5/11/2014 2:02:33 AM
I have quite a few female friends that have gone the opposite way. Kathy's are all now Kathleen's, Jenny's are now Jennifer's. Not even for professional reasons, they just wanted to. They don't expect old friends to change what they call them, but they introduce themselves now with their given names. As my Grandma used to say.. "It's no skin off my ass". DH both go by the Y nick names of our given names. Always have, always will.

ETA: Adding an O instead of a Y might make me go Stevie did a great job sounds better than Steve-O did.

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PeaNut 172,235
October 2004
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Posted: 5/11/2014 3:21:14 AM

Johnnie (with an ie at that) Walker Red Whiskey

Tommy Hilfiger, Tommy Bahama, Johnny Depp....

it's all good

Yeah, again, not reading the question/thread fully.

No one said that names ending in ie or y are skeevy.

Today, I will be colouring outside the lines.

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PeaNut 159,331
July 2004
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Posted: 5/11/2014 3:22:04 AM
I wouldn't go so far as to call it skeevy. I don't like it, though, and I refuse to abide by it. I call them by the adult version of their name (John, Tom, Rick, Bill, Bob or Rob/Robert, etc). And I start young... a family friend who is the same age (a year younger, actually, I think) as me was Tommy to everyone but me growing up. There was a kid in my hockey league that was Ricky to everyone except me... I think I called him Ricky until about age 13, and then I switched to Rick. In general, I just outright refuse to call a guy by a name that ends in 'y'/'ie.'

The only time I'd be willing to call a man by a name that ends in the 'y' sound is in the case of a Charlie or a Larry or an Andy - and even then, I'd be more comfortable with Charles/Lawrence/Andrew, which are more appropriate names for an adult male.


In the specific case described by the OP, it actually is skeevy. In most cases, it's just not cool and I won't go along with it.

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PeaNut 166,713
September 2004
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Posted: 5/11/2014 3:44:01 AM
I don't find it weird. Mind you, I'm in New Zealand we like nicknames here. I know a lot of people that don't use their birth certificate name. Could be worse. My husband is Australian and lots of the names there end with O. David would be known as Dave-O. Stephen would be known as Steve-O. Jonathon would be John-O etc.


PeaNut 28,992
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Posted: 5/11/2014 6:53:07 AM
Thanks for the definition Gar.


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PeaNut 274,243
August 2006
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Posted: 5/11/2014 6:54:25 AM
The way you describe bit OP, it sounds very midlife.

In general, I believe you call a person what they want to be called. It their name, their life. However, if it's someone you have known for 30 years, making that change is difficult and the person may have to accept that.

My niece changed her name when she started college. Something completely different than her real name. I can't for the life of remember to use it!! Her mother has started to, but not her dad.
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