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edie3

Member Since August 2001, 22796 forum posts, 425 public projects

Location: nc

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Things you won't see on a Hallmark Card

Original Author: Unknown

Things You Won't See On Hallmark Cards OUTSIDE: As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am... INSIDE: That you're not here to ruin it for me. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: If I get only one thing for Christmas... INSIDE: I hope it's your sister. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. INSIDE: After having met you, I've changed my mind. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: I must admit, you brought religion into my life. INSIDE: I never believed in hell 'til I met you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder... INSIDE: What the fuck was I thinking? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: I always wanted to be rich, powerful and well-respected. INSIDE: And while I'm dreaming, I wish you weren't so damn ugly. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Sex with you is like using drugs: INSIDE: Lots of people do it, but nobody's stupid enough to admit it. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. INSIDE: Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: The holidays are a great time to be with family. INSIDE: Of course, your family won't be with you, since I'm taking the kids and moving in with my sister, you cheating bastard! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: I'm so miserable without you... INSIDE: It's almost like you're here. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: If you ever need a friend... INSIDE: Buy a dog. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Congratulations on your new bundle of joy. INSIDE: Did you ever find out who the father was? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: So your daughter's a hooker and it spoiled your day. INSIDE: Look at the bright side -- it's really good pay. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: My tire was thumping. INSIDE: I thought it was flat. When I looked at the tire, I noticed your cat. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: You had your bladder removed and you're on the mends. INSIDE: Here's a bouquet of flowers and a box of depends. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Heard your wife left you, how upset you must be. INSIDE: But don't fret about it, she moved in with me. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Congratulations on your wedding day!! INSIDE: Too bad no one likes your husband. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: How could two people as beautiful as you .... INSIDE: Have such an ugly baby? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Congratulations on your promotion. INSIDE: Before you go, would you like to take this knife out of my back? You'll probably need it again. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Someday I hope to get married.......... INSIDE: but not to you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: Happy birthday!! You look great for your age...... INSIDE: Almost lifelike! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OUTSIDE: We have been friends for a very long time INSIDE: what say we stop?

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3/16/2007 7:31:07 PM | Comments (0) | Send a Message (PeaMail) | Vote for this PeaSoup

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nginx

PeaSoup

may the sun

Original Author: Unknown

may the sun bring you new energy by day. may the moon softly restore you by night. may the rain was away your worries. may the breeze blow new strength into your being. may you walk gently throught the world and know its beauty all the days of your life.

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6/29/2006 8:35:11 PM | Comments (0) | Send a Message (PeaMail) | Vote for this PeaSoup

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nginx

PeaSoup

A teacher's task

Original Author: Unknown

A teacher's constant task is to take a roomful of live wires and see to it that they're grounded.

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9/10/2005 10:32:11 AM | Comments (0) | Send a Message (PeaMail) | Vote for this PeaSoup

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nginx

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Nothing that is loved

Original Author: Unknown

Nothing that is loved is ever lost... No one who has touched a life, Who has brought beauty into the world is ever truly gone.

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9/9/2005 7:01:34 PM | Comments (0) | Send a Message (PeaMail) | Vote for this PeaSoup

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nginx
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